GA Review
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Reviewer: Adog (talk · contribs) 19:27, 7 August 2023 (UTC)
Good Article review progress box
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I will do one more review this week. An educator is back in session, plus a new side gig. I will have this done for sure, definitely, absolutely, by Tuesday, August 8, and if not, you are backed by my back-bone guarantee. If I do not, you may fire me on live on KDVR. Adog (Talk・Cont) 19:27, 7 August 2023 (UTC)
Good afternoon (from my locale) Sammi Brie! Again, the following are suggestions for grammar or sentence structure for the editor-at-large. If said suggestions are not appropriate or improper, feel free to ignore them:
Prose
editLead
edit- The two stations are owned by Nexstar Media Group alongside CW station KWGN-TV (channel 2). could be written as
Nexstar Media Group owns the two stations alongside CW station KWGN-TV (channel 2).
The original permittee had intended to make channel 31 a Spanish-language station, but when census figures revealed fewer Hispanics lived in Denver than estimated, the group sold the permit, and Centennial Broadcasting built the station as Denver's second English-language independent station.
I am thinking a new sentence can start at "Centennial" since the first half is a complete thought. Unless these two sentences work better together.... sold the permit. Centennial Broadcasting ...
The station was sold twice in the early 1990s, to Chase Broadcasting in 1989 and to Renaissance Broadcasting in 1992.
the second "to" may be omitted, up to you.- For better clarity, the sentence As part of a trade, Fox Television Stations, the owned-and-operated stations division of the Fox network, acquired KDVR in 1995. could have the statement "as part of the trade" at the end for a better flow:
Fox Television Stations, the owned-and-operated station's division of the Fox network, acquired KDVR in 1995 as part of a trade.
- The following sentence:
It moved the station out of cramped facilities and into its present studios in 2000, which allowed for the long-awaited debut of a local 9 p.m. newscast on the station
, the phrase "which allowed" could be "allowing" and "on the station" may be omitted.
History
editEarly history
In late 1981, it sold 80 percent[4] of the construction permit to Centennial Broadcasting Corporation, a subsidiary of Camellia City Telecasters and majority-owned by Business Men's Assurance Company (BMA) of Kansas City, Missouri (with Sandoval staying as manager), and plans were changed to operate a full-service English-language independent station incorporating programming for Hispanics in Denver.
could be split into two sentences as the first part is a complete thought:... (with Sandoval staying as manager). Plans ...
- Regarding the next sentence or half sentence, readers might need clarity as to who changed plans. I assume, La Unidad. Phrase: "and plans were changed to operate a full-service".
... and denied Camellia City the ability to bid on syndicated shows for their own stations.
"Own" may be omitted.
Chase and Renaissance ownership
- in order to to "to".
Fox Television Stations ownership
- ... NBC filed a request to the FCC to reject the trade, on the grounds that the company was in violation of foreign ownership rules ... might read better as
... NBC filed a request to the FCC to reject the trade because the company violated foreign ownership rules ...
... after an objection was filed on ownership grounds
Readers might need clarity as to who filed an objection in Phili.On February 21, 1998, the company announced that it would build ...
"that" may be omitted.- Same sentence:
the very site from which KWGN-TV and KDVR had started broadcasting, 30 years apart
"very" could be omitted. Omit comma before 30 years?- Left the comma in here.
Local TV and Tribune ownership
... Fox Television Stations entered into an agreement to sell ...
"entered into an agreement" to simply "agreed"?Two months later, on September 17 ...
"Two months later" may be redundant as September 17 is stated thereafter. The preceding date to match with September is at the end of the previous sentence.
Local programming
editNews operation
- For sentences
The first step in organizing the news department was made ...
andMore hires were made ...
, readers might need a refresher on who did these actions. Presumably Fox. So it could readFox made the first steps ...
or KDVR, or someone else.
Other programming
From 2009 to 2010, KDVR aired Everyday with Libby and Natalie, a daytime lifestyle program hosted by Libby Weaver and reported Natalie Tysdal.
Insert "by" before "Natalie"?- Should be "reporter". Oops.
Other comments or concerns
edit- At the end of the first paragraph in "History", I believe reference [3][1] should be flipped numerically.
- In "Chase and Renaissance ownership", I feel like you could merge these small paragraphs into two proportional narratives. One paragraph could start with "BMA put its Denver and Sacramento television stations ..." and end at "It was cramped, isolated, and suffered from cellular interference issues." Next one "Chase closed on its purchase of KDVR in March 1990." and ending with "... expanding coverage to parts of northern Colorado and far southern Wyoming".
- Implemented differently because I want the KFCT info to stand alone in this section.
- MOS:DUPLINKs for "Denver Broncos" in subsection "Sports programming", original in subsection "News operation" and "KWGN-TV" in subsection "Subchannels", original in subsection "Early history".
- Not touching the one in the table.
Highlighting some more comments for your viewing and should be passed after these are adjusted:
- In "History" subsection "Early history",
... station met with an unexpected dose of reality
does not feel right. Maybe an unexpected snag/obstacle/complication/drawback? - In the "Fox Television Stations ownership" subsection, I would also consider merging the first two paragraphs since they are pretty small.
- In the subsection "Local TV and Tribune ownership", there is a "the" with a lowercase:
Local TV LLC.[49] the sale was finalized on December 27.[50]
- In the subsection "News operation" under "Local programming", not sure if "chatter" is the right word here. Maybe discussion/rumor/talk/discourse and more clarity as to who was talking about this first newscast for the station? I assume members in the industry, or possibly the general public, but I do not have access to the article.
- In the same subsection, the sentence
Two months later, on March 30 ...
could also trim "Two months later" because the previous and current sentences do stick with the date. - For the MOS:DUPLINK above, my mistake for not clarifying. There is also an additional link for "KWGN-TV" below the table in the sentence starting with "In December ...".
@Sammi Brie: As far as the article is looking, it is looking good! I have some suggested edited above for my first skim-through. I will be back later in the day to read the article more thoroughly and provide any additional suggestions for corrections as needed! Adog (Talk・Cont) 20:04, 8 August 2023 (UTC)
- @Adog: Most changes made. One or two interpreted differently. Sammi Brie (she/her • t • c) 23:58, 8 August 2023 (UTC)
- @Sammi Brie: How is it going! Finished reading the article. Only have some minor concerns listed above in the other section. Other than that, I can pass! Another good read, this time about the Denver station. Got some perspective on how the morning news show began and how they broadcasted certain segments for air time. Adog (Talk・Cont) 02:30, 9 August 2023 (UTC)
- @Adog Done. Sammi Brie (she/her • t • c) 02:34, 9 August 2023 (UTC)
- @Sammi Brie: How is it going! Finished reading the article. Only have some minor concerns listed above in the other section. Other than that, I can pass! Another good read, this time about the Denver station. Got some perspective on how the morning news show began and how they broadcasted certain segments for air time. Adog (Talk・Cont) 02:30, 9 August 2023 (UTC)
Prose + verifiability
editThe prose of the article is well-written, with some minor grammatical or sentence structure issues noted above. The article has a list of verifiable references in proper formatting. I will AGF on the offline sources that I cannot access. Spot checks that I performed were all clear. The article does not have issues with original research, and Earwig similarly does not pick up anything on copyright issues. I did not see any close paraphrasing in spot checks worth exploring. Adog (Talk・Cont) 02:30, 9 August 2023 (UTC)
Broadness + focus + neutral
editThe article has a broad range of contextual content and focuses well on the station's relevant history and programming. The article is written in a neutral tone. Adog (Talk・Cont) 02:30, 9 August 2023 (UTC)
Images + stability
editThe article is illustrated with proper images that are relevant to the article and are properly licensed. I had a good laugh at the "ermission is granted to do what the fuck you want to with this document under the terms of the WTF Public License, Version 2." Who knew that was a thing? The article is stable, no ongoing or active edit wars or content disputes. Adog (Talk・Cont) 20:04, 8 August 2023 (UTC)