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External links modified
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- Added archive https://web.archive.org/web/20140111064931/http://www.fimi.it/4111 to http://www.fimi.it/4111
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External links modified
editHello fellow Wikipedians,
I have just modified 2 external links on L'essenziale. Please take a moment to review my edit. If you have any questions, or need the bot to ignore the links, or the page altogether, please visit this simple FaQ for additional information. I made the following changes:
- Added archive https://archive.is/2013.05.19-210016/http://www.sorrisi.com/2013/04/20/marco-mengoni-allo-stadio-di-verona-dietro-le-quinte-del-video-pronto-a-correre-intervista-e-gallery/ to http://www.sorrisi.com/2013/04/20/marco-mengoni-allo-stadio-di-verona-dietro-le-quinte-del-video-pronto-a-correre-intervista-e-gallery/
- Added archive https://web.archive.org/web/20130610045512/http://www.rockol.it/news-501629/Concerti%2C-Marco-Mengoni-la-recensione-dello-show-di-Torino to http://www.rockol.it/news-501629/Concerti%2C-Marco-Mengoni-la-recensione-dello-show-di-Torino
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External links modified
editHello fellow Wikipedians,
I have just modified one external link on L'essenziale. Please take a moment to review my edit. If you have any questions, or need the bot to ignore the links, or the page altogether, please visit this simple FaQ for additional information. I made the following changes:
- Added archive https://archive.is/20130519093532/http://www.sorrisi.com/2013/04/24/marco-mengoni-taglia-30-secondi-della-sua-lessenziale-per-leurovision-song-contest/ to http://www.sorrisi.com/2013/04/24/marco-mengoni-taglia-30-secondi-della-sua-lessenziale-per-leurovision-song-contest/
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GA Review
editGA toolbox |
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Reviewing |
- This review is transcluded from Talk:L'essenziale/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: Kyle Peake (talk · contribs) 19:39, 4 May 2020 (UTC)
Good Article review progress box
|
Will give a review of this tomorrow. --Kyle Peake (talk) 19:39, 4 May 2020 (UTC)
Infobox and lead
edit- The writers should be placed in the infobox using a list made up of asterixes on separate lines
- Under lyricists in the entry infobox, Casalino and Mengoni should only be mentioned by the surnames on the second mentions and no wikilinking by then
- The lead does not need to be four paragraphs since they are incredibly short; will help you fix where paras are below
- References should not be in the lead at all
- "The essential" should be in bold
- "is a song recorded by" → "is a song by"
- Continue the first sentence with "from his second studio album, #prontoacorrere (2013)
- "Written by" → "While written by" to flow better with the production mention in prose
- "Benedettis and Mengoni himself" → "Benedettis, and Mengoni"
- The single release sentence should directly come after this
- Second para should not begin at this point
- "After winning the" → "After it won the"
- Says here RAI but Rai 2 in the body; what's up with that difference?
- Remove wikilink on Sweden
- "finished 7th among" → "finished seventh among" per MOS:NUMBERS
- Change the release sentence to "The song was released in Italy as the album's lead single on 13 February 2013."
- The lead single release should be written out in prose as well as listed under release history
- Begin new para after the finalists sentence
- "the song was commercially successful in Italy," → "In Italy, "L'essenziale" was commercially successful,"
- Target FIMI to Federazione Industria Musicale Italiana
- Add the certifications table to cite the Italy certification so this ref shouldn't be needed here.
- "2013 in Italy" → "2013 in the country"
- Use this sentence's ref in the body to write out that it was the top selling Italian music artist song in the performance section
- "becoming a top-twenty hit in Italy" → "reaching the top 20 of the FIMI Singles Chart" and keep this as part of the above para
Background and composition
edit- "The song was written by Italian singer Marco Mengoni" → ""L'essenziale" was written by Mengoni"
- "in Fano, in the" → "in Fano, of the" to avoid repetitive wording
- "playing guitar and he wrote" → "playing guitar and wrote"
- "Francesco De Benedittis later contributed" → "Benedittis later contributed"
- "In the beginning of 2012" → "Early in 2012"
- "for his following album" → "for his then-upcoming album"
- A lot of the text here is not backed up by ref 8
- "lyrics and music" → "music and lyrics"
- "idea on the track" → "idea towards the track"
- "he was living a moment" → "Casalino was living a moment"
- "and he started" → "and had started"
- "like those people he really loved and who really counted in his life" → "like those people who Casalino loved and really counted in his life"
- "released to Italian magazine" → "released to the Italian magazine"
- "described the song as" → "described "L'essenziale" as"
- "expressing" → "with the expression of"
- The third para is only one sentence; either exp this para or move the sentence somewhere else to a legitimate para - maybe the following section?
Music video and promotion
edit- "Milan and Brescia, in" → "Milan and Brescia of"
- "the music video for" → "the video for"
- "The video was released on" → "It was released to"
- "On 28 March 2013" → "On 28 March of that year"
- "of the official music video was also released" → "of the visual was released" since also implies something else was released on the same date
- "the principle of life"." → "the principle of life."" since WP:QUOTEMARK says quoted full sentences should have punctuation inside quotes
- "and launching the album #prontoacorrere" → "and launching #prontoacorrere"
- "performed the song" → "performed the former"
- Wikilink on Sanremo Music Festival 2013
- Add what month the TV show performance was "of that year"
- "he performed the song during" → "Mengoni performed the song during"
- "as a duet with" → "for a duet with"
- "During the last episode" → "That same month, during the last episode"
- "on the set list of his tour with" → "on the set list for Mengoni's tour of"
- "On 13 April 2013, Mengoni sang" → "On 13 April 2013, he sang"
- "while on 11 May 2013" → "while on 11 May of that year"
- "performed it during" → "performed it as part of"
Chart performance
edit- Retitle to Commercial performance
- "the Italian Top Digital Downloads chart during" → "the Italian FIMI Singles Chart for" since that is the name even though sales are counted by downloads
- "four days after the release of the song" → "four days after its release"
- "mid April 2013, completing" → "mid-April 2013, spending"
- "and three weeks later it fell outside the top ten" → "and it fell outside the top ten three weeks later"
- "On 21 February 2013" → "On 21 February of that year"
- "while on 2 April 2013 it went multi-platinum" → "while it went multi-platinum by 2 April 2013"
- Change Federation of the Italian Music Industry to Federazione Industria Musicale Italiana with no wikilink though since that's already been done
- How many download units does quadruple plat indicate? Note it...
- "and Pharrell Williams and Avicii's" → "and Pharrell Williams, and Avicii's"
- "also entered the top 40" → "further charted within the top 40"
- "charts both in Wallonia and the Flanders" → "charts for both Wallonia and the Flanders"
- Cite Swiss chart by using a refname from the singlechart format of the chart table instead, do the same with the Belgium charts, separately though.
- "it also debuted at number" → "it debuted at number"
- "and at number 69 on" → "and number 69 on"
Song contests
editSanremo Music Festival
edit- Img needs alt text and wikilink 63rd Sanremo Music Festival to Sanremo Music Festival 2013 on it
- However, remove the wikilink to the former within the first para solely in prose, since that has already been wikilinked in the body
- "the first time during the" → "the first time at the"
- "night, "L'essenziale" won against "Bellissimo" as" → "night, "L'essenziale" won against the latter as"
- "performed by Mengoni during" → "performed by Mengoni for"
- Target music journalists to Music journalism
- "during the last round" → "in the last round"
- "beating the remaining top three entries" → "beating the remaining entries within the top three"
- "During the same night" → "That same night"
- Add the sentence below to the end of this sub-section's second para, rather than having its own para
Eurovision Song Contest
edit- Img needs alt text and a wikilink on Eurovision Song Contest 2013
- As I said before in the lead review, I'm confused if it's RAI or Rai 2?
- Remove wikilink on Eurovision Song Contest 2013 in the text of the sub-section, since you already wikilinked to that in the body
- "The last time Italy was represented in the Eurovision Song Contest by the winning song of the Sanremo Music Festival was in 1997" → "This marked the first time Italy was represented in the Eurovision Song Contest by the winning song of the Sanremo Music Festival since 1997"
- "decided to perform the song" → "decided to perform the track"
- "the version of the song performed" → "the version of the track performed"
- "to a length of 3 minutes" → "to a length of three minutes"
- Remove wikilink on Sweden
- "the 23rd during the night" → "the 23rd of the night"
- "movements and colours and wearing" → "movements and colours, while wearing"
- Remove wikilink on suit
- "While commenting on this choice, Mengoni" → "While commenting on this choice, he"
- "the air to hear it"." → "the air to hear it.""
- Remove the wikilinks on those countries within the final para
Track listing
edit- This needs a ref to verify itself
Credits and personnel
edit- Good
Charts
editPeak positions
edit- Retitle to Weekly charts
- Appears you have cited a ref archived from 2012 of the chart for Italy; this is incorrect since the song peaked in 2013
Year-end charts
edit- Good
Certifications
edit- Create this section for the Italy certification; see "Black Skinhead" as an example of how to enter one
Release history
edit- Change Region to Country
- Format should come after Date, then follow the former on with Version
- The label(s) used to release the song should be included in the table as the fifth entry
- Give the ref(s) their own separate col as the last one, and centre them
- Target Digital download to Music download
- Add wikilink on Airplay
References
editSeem alright, will look at them once you have made the other fixes though since that will change the ref order, technically- Copyvio score is good
- Archive all of these using the tool
- Refs 1, 9, 20, 23, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 44, 55 and 56 are missing accessdates
- Ref 12 should be italicised
- Refs 52 and 53 shouldn't music.apple.com as well as Apple Music
External links
edit- Good
Final comments and verdict
edit- On hold for now, but I will have minor comments once you have complied. --Kyle Peake (talk) 06:16, 5 May 2020 (UTC)
- @Kyle Peake: I believe I've addressed your concerns so far, though I didn't always reword each phrase exactly as you wrote. Grk1011 (talk) 15:49, 6 May 2020 (UTC)
- @Grk1011: ✓ Pass for this article now, good co-operating with me on this review page though. --Kyle Peake (talk) 20:42, 6 May 2020 (UTC)
Further comments
edit- Grk1011, So I looked for any further fixes, I'll fix in the refs within their sub-section but here's ones for any remaining issues. --Kyle Peake (talk) 18:53, 6 May 2020 (UTC)
- The title in brackets in the lead should be in bold since that is done for alternate titles of tracks
- RAI/Rai 2 is still confusing; only one is mentioned in the body so either change that or the one in the lead to make sense
- When I have requested to change to "the track", that is because using "the song" too much is repetitive in the article
- Release history doesn't have uses of multiple rowspan that should have be done.
- It's not an alternative title, it's the English translation, so I've left it unbolded. Calling it a "track" is too technical, so it should really be one or the other. Are there instances where I could cut down on the use of "song"? Rowspan and RAi are now done. Thanks! Grk1011 (talk) 19:09, 6 May 2020 (UTC)
- Grk1011 Within the Eurovision Song Contest sub-section, understand? --Kyle Peake (talk) 19:53, 6 May 2020 (UTC)
- Sure, I reworded it a bit. Grk1011 (talk) 20:04, 6 May 2020 (UTC)
- Grk1011 Within the Eurovision Song Contest sub-section, understand? --Kyle Peake (talk) 19:53, 6 May 2020 (UTC)
- It's not an alternative title, it's the English translation, so I've left it unbolded. Calling it a "track" is too technical, so it should really be one or the other. Are there instances where I could cut down on the use of "song"? Rowspan and RAi are now done. Thanks! Grk1011 (talk) 19:09, 6 May 2020 (UTC)