Talk:L'essenziale

Latest comment: 4 years ago by Kyle Peake in topic GA Review
Good articleL'essenziale has been listed as one of the Music good articles under the good article criteria. If you can improve it further, please do so. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can reassess it.
Article milestones
DateProcessResult
May 6, 2020Good article nomineeListed
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GA Review

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This review is transcluded from Talk:L'essenziale/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Kyle Peake (talk · contribs) 19:39, 4 May 2020 (UTC)Reply


Good Article review progress box
Criteria: 1a. prose ( ) 1b. MoS ( ) 2a. ref layout ( ) 2b. cites WP:RS ( ) 2c. no WP:OR ( ) 2d. no WP:CV ( )
3a. broadness ( ) 3b. focus ( ) 4. neutral ( ) 5. stable ( ) 6a. free or tagged images ( ) 6b. pics relevant ( )
Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked   are unassessed

Will give a review of this tomorrow. --Kyle Peake (talk) 19:39, 4 May 2020 (UTC)Reply

Infobox and lead

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  • The writers should be placed in the infobox using a list made up of asterixes on separate lines
  • Under lyricists in the entry infobox, Casalino and Mengoni should only be mentioned by the surnames on the second mentions and no wikilinking by then
  • The lead does not need to be four paragraphs since they are incredibly short; will help you fix where paras are below
  • References should not be in the lead at all
  • "The essential" should be in bold
  • "is a song recorded by" → "is a song by"
  • Continue the first sentence with "from his second studio album, #prontoacorrere (2013)
  • "Written by" → "While written by" to flow better with the production mention in prose
  • "Benedettis and Mengoni himself" → "Benedettis, and Mengoni"
  • The single release sentence should directly come after this
  • Second para should not begin at this point
  • "After winning the" → "After it won the"
  • Says here RAI but Rai 2 in the body; what's up with that difference?
  • Remove wikilink on Sweden
  • "finished 7th among" → "finished seventh among" per MOS:NUMBERS
  • Change the release sentence to "The song was released in Italy as the album's lead single on 13 February 2013."
  • The lead single release should be written out in prose as well as listed under release history
  • Begin new para after the finalists sentence
  • "the song was commercially successful in Italy," → "In Italy, "L'essenziale" was commercially successful,"
  • Target FIMI to Federazione Industria Musicale Italiana
  • Add the certifications table to cite the Italy certification so this ref shouldn't be needed here.
  • "2013 in Italy" → "2013 in the country"
  • Use this sentence's ref in the body to write out that it was the top selling Italian music artist song in the performance section
  • "becoming a top-twenty hit in Italy" → "reaching the top 20 of the FIMI Singles Chart" and keep this as part of the above para

Background and composition

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  • "The song was written by Italian singer Marco Mengoni" → ""L'essenziale" was written by Mengoni"
  • "in Fano, in the" → "in Fano, of the" to avoid repetitive wording
  • "playing guitar and he wrote" → "playing guitar and wrote"
  • "Francesco De Benedittis later contributed" → "Benedittis later contributed"
  • "In the beginning of 2012" → "Early in 2012"
  • "for his following album" → "for his then-upcoming album"
  • A lot of the text here is not backed up by ref 8
  • "lyrics and music" → "music and lyrics"
  • "idea on the track" → "idea towards the track"
  • "he was living a moment" → "Casalino was living a moment"
  • "and he started" → "and had started"
  • "like those people he really loved and who really counted in his life" → "like those people who Casalino loved and really counted in his life"
  • "released to Italian magazine" → "released to the Italian magazine"
  • "described the song as" → "described "L'essenziale" as"
  • "expressing" → "with the expression of"
  • The third para is only one sentence; either exp this para or move the sentence somewhere else to a legitimate para - maybe the following section?

Music video and promotion

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  • "Milan and Brescia, in" → "Milan and Brescia of"
  • "the music video for" → "the video for"
  • "The video was released on" → "It was released to"
  • "On 28 March 2013" → "On 28 March of that year"
  • "of the official music video was also released" → "of the visual was released" since also implies something else was released on the same date
  • "the principle of life"." → "the principle of life."" since WP:QUOTEMARK says quoted full sentences should have punctuation inside quotes
  • "and launching the album #prontoacorrere" → "and launching #prontoacorrere"
  • "performed the song" → "performed the former"
  • Wikilink on Sanremo Music Festival 2013
  • Add what month the TV show performance was "of that year"
  • "he performed the song during" → "Mengoni performed the song during"
  • "as a duet with" → "for a duet with"
  • "During the last episode" → "That same month, during the last episode"
  • "on the set list of his tour with" → "on the set list for Mengoni's tour of"
  • "On 13 April 2013, Mengoni sang" → "On 13 April 2013, he sang"
  • "while on 11 May 2013" → "while on 11 May of that year"
  • "performed it during" → "performed it as part of"

Chart performance

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  • Retitle to Commercial performance
  • "the Italian Top Digital Downloads chart during" → "the Italian FIMI Singles Chart for" since that is the name even though sales are counted by downloads
  • "four days after the release of the song" → "four days after its release"
  • "mid April 2013, completing" → "mid-April 2013, spending"
  • "and three weeks later it fell outside the top ten" → "and it fell outside the top ten three weeks later"
  • "On 21 February 2013" → "On 21 February of that year"
  • "while on 2 April 2013 it went multi-platinum" → "while it went multi-platinum by 2 April 2013"
  • Change Federation of the Italian Music Industry to Federazione Industria Musicale Italiana with no wikilink though since that's already been done
  • How many download units does quadruple plat indicate? Note it...
  • "and Pharrell Williams and Avicii's" → "and Pharrell Williams, and Avicii's"
  • "also entered the top 40" → "further charted within the top 40"
  • "charts both in Wallonia and the Flanders" → "charts for both Wallonia and the Flanders"
  • Cite Swiss chart by using a refname from the singlechart format of the chart table instead, do the same with the Belgium charts, separately though.
  • "it also debuted at number" → "it debuted at number"
  • "and at number 69 on" → "and number 69 on"

Song contests

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Sanremo Music Festival

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  • Img needs alt text and wikilink 63rd Sanremo Music Festival to Sanremo Music Festival 2013 on it
  • However, remove the wikilink to the former within the first para solely in prose, since that has already been wikilinked in the body
  • "the first time during the" → "the first time at the"
  • "night, "L'essenziale" won against "Bellissimo" as" → "night, "L'essenziale" won against the latter as"
  • "performed by Mengoni during" → "performed by Mengoni for"
  • Target music journalists to Music journalism
  • "during the last round" → "in the last round"
  • "beating the remaining top three entries" → "beating the remaining entries within the top three"
  • "During the same night" → "That same night"
  • Add the sentence below to the end of this sub-section's second para, rather than having its own para

Eurovision Song Contest

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  • Img needs alt text and a wikilink on Eurovision Song Contest 2013
  • As I said before in the lead review, I'm confused if it's RAI or Rai 2?
  • Remove wikilink on Eurovision Song Contest 2013 in the text of the sub-section, since you already wikilinked to that in the body
  • "The last time Italy was represented in the Eurovision Song Contest by the winning song of the Sanremo Music Festival was in 1997" → "This marked the first time Italy was represented in the Eurovision Song Contest by the winning song of the Sanremo Music Festival since 1997"
  • "decided to perform the song" → "decided to perform the track"
  • "the version of the song performed" → "the version of the track performed"
  • "to a length of 3 minutes" → "to a length of three minutes"
  • Remove wikilink on Sweden
  • "the 23rd during the night" → "the 23rd of the night"
  • "movements and colours and wearing" → "movements and colours, while wearing"
  • Remove wikilink on suit
  • "While commenting on this choice, Mengoni" → "While commenting on this choice, he"
  • "the air to hear it"." → "the air to hear it.""
  • Remove the wikilinks on those countries within the final para

Track listing

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  • This needs a ref to verify itself

Credits and personnel

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  • Good

Charts

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Peak positions

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  • Retitle to Weekly charts
  • Appears you have cited a ref archived from 2012 of the chart for Italy; this is incorrect since the song peaked in 2013

Year-end charts

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  • Good

Certifications

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  • Create this section for the Italy certification; see "Black Skinhead" as an example of how to enter one

Release history

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  • Change Region to Country
  • Format should come after Date, then follow the former on with Version
  • The label(s) used to release the song should be included in the table as the fifth entry
  • Give the ref(s) their own separate col as the last one, and centre them
  • Target Digital download to Music download
  • Add wikilink on Airplay

References

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  • Seem alright, will look at them once you have made the other fixes though since that will change the ref order, technically
  • Copyvio score is good
  • Archive all of these using the tool
  • Refs 1, 9, 20, 23, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 44, 55 and 56 are missing accessdates
  • Ref 12 should be italicised
  • Refs 52 and 53 shouldn't music.apple.com as well as Apple Music
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  • Good

Final comments and verdict

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@Kyle Peake: I believe I've addressed your concerns so far, though I didn't always reword each phrase exactly as you wrote. Grk1011 (talk) 15:49, 6 May 2020 (UTC)Reply
@Grk1011:  Pass for this article now, good co-operating with me on this review page though. --Kyle Peake (talk) 20:42, 6 May 2020 (UTC)Reply

Further comments

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  • Grk1011, So I looked for any further fixes, I'll fix in the refs within their sub-section but here's ones for any remaining issues. --Kyle Peake (talk) 18:53, 6 May 2020 (UTC)Reply
  • The title in brackets in the lead should be in bold since that is done for alternate titles of tracks
  • RAI/Rai 2 is still confusing; only one is mentioned in the body so either change that or the one in the lead to make sense
  • When I have requested to change to "the track", that is because using "the song" too much is repetitive in the article
  • Release history doesn't have uses of multiple rowspan that should have be done.
It's not an alternative title, it's the English translation, so I've left it unbolded. Calling it a "track" is too technical, so it should really be one or the other. Are there instances where I could cut down on the use of "song"? Rowspan and RAi are now done. Thanks! Grk1011 (talk) 19:09, 6 May 2020 (UTC)Reply
Grk1011 Within the Eurovision Song Contest sub-section, understand? --Kyle Peake (talk) 19:53, 6 May 2020 (UTC)Reply
Sure, I reworded it a bit. Grk1011 (talk) 20:04, 6 May 2020 (UTC)Reply