Talk:Metellina segmentata
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Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment
editThis article was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment, between 15 September 2020 and 17 December 2020. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Shutaro.hayashihara. Peer reviewers: Katherine.handley, Keremyucebas, Sandeep525.
Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 03:57, 17 January 2022 (UTC)
Info/Student Edit
editHello! I edited the article and just wanted to breakdown what I did, let me know if there are any confusions. I edited some of the wording within most sections. I removed the common names section, as I did not see it as a category in the layout, and felt it fit better within the lead. I also changed the title of taxonomy to Population structure, speciation, and phylogeny. I rearranged quite a bit of information so that it follows the template given on the WikiSpider project article format. I removed the category anatomy and placed this information under description, as I feel this information is describing the spider. I would maybe look over all the different categories you have both within the mating and reproduction sections and see if there is any way to separate this information into more categories? It has a lot of good information, but I think it can be split up into different subsections that follow the format. I started to do this, but did not want to change a significant amount of your wording without you first taking a look. you had mentioned briefly within diet that this spider has observed sexual cannibalism, I think removing this from the diet section and addressing it under female/male interactions or mating would be more appropriate. Katherine.handley (talk) 16:46, 1 November 2020 (UTC)
Student Edit
editHi there! The major changes I made to the article included making the sentences less choppy and flow better. I made the sentence structure more varied in order for the information to read better and feel less like bullet points. I also reorganized some of the information in order to make the most related information closest to each other.
I also added more details to make your sentences more descriptive. For example, I changed “two legs stretch in front of them while the other legs stretch backward” to “two legs stretch to the front while the other six legs stretch towards the back”
I also changed your formatting of data such as “4-6mms long” to “4-6 mm long”.
I also removed a few small typos.
In your diet section, you mention female cannibalization. I think this could be discussed further in the Mating sections, and maybe you could add a Male-Female Competition section. Additionally, the aggression category could be broken up into Male-Male aggression and Female-Female aggression.
Lastly, your section titled “Bites to Humans and Animals” only mentions human bites, so I changed the title to “Bites to Humans”.
sandeep525 (talk) —Preceding undated comment added 23:56, 2 November 2020 (UTC)
Peer Student Edit
editI really liked your page. I made a few edits to make it even better: I added two new images. One of them displays the description of the spider more clearly, and the other one shows how the webs spun by these spiders look. I also added some more links (courtship, cocoon, habitat, etc.) and corrected grammatical and punctuation errors. I also moved the Webs header lower in the page because there wasn’t much information in it and I felt like it was disrupting the flow.
One thing I think you could add is providing more detail on what kind of animals it predates. You only said moth and fly but there are hundreds of species of these animals. Specifying will make the article sound more legitimate.