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Latest comment: 9 years ago1 comment1 person in discussion
Under "Early career and success," you wrote that the Elite Model Look competition is "one of the most influential modeling contests in the world." I suggest citing a source that calls it one of the most influential competitions -- otherwise, it sounds like it might be your opinion that this competition is so influential. I think just adding a reference for this statement would make it sound unbiased.
It also says "Ming won a third by end of the competition" -- if this means to say that she won third place, I suggest rewriting this as: "Ming placed third in the competition."
I think "Early life" and "Early career and success" could be merged into just one section. The heading "Early life" could be deleted, and move that paragraph to be the first paragraph under the heading "Early career and success." They go together, and it is all really talking about the beginning of her career.
In the first paragraph of your article you state, “Same year, she modeled Givenchy ready-to-wear collections and appeared as the face of Givenchy's Fall/Winter publicity advertising campaign.” I would change that sentence to say, “In the same year, Ming Xi modeled the Givenchy ready-to-wear collection and appeared as the face of Givenchy’s Fall/Winter publicity advertising campaign.” The rest of the article is very organized and looks great!-HortonV (talk) 00:00, 7 April 2015 (UTC)Reply
