Talk:Mission Mountain Wood Band/GA1
Latest comment: 7 years ago by Cwmhiraeth in topic GA Review
GA Review
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Reviewer: Cwmhiraeth (talk · contribs) 06:14, 18 August 2017 (UTC)
- I propose taking on this review and will read the article in detail soon. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 06:14, 18 August 2017 (UTC)
First reading
editThe prose is generally good. The layout seems suitable, but I must admit to having little knowledge about this type of article. I read the main body of text first, finishing up with the lead. I found one statement in the lead (the last bullet point below) not covered by the main text. Can you find any more images?
- "The Band was formed in 1971" - I'm not sure why this band has a capital letter.
- Fixed. --MTBW
- Is "Jubileers" a real word?
- Yes, at least it was the name of the chorale. Rephrased --MTBW
- "The elder Riddle had been in a touring folk band" - this is presumably Dick, but you did not mention whether he was older or younger than Steve when you introduced him.
- Fixed --MTBW
- " and became something of a party anthem" - What is a party anthem?
- American slang for song sung at the sorts of adult parties where imbibing intoxicating substances is encouraged. (Such as Sammy Hagar's Mas Tequilla) --MTBW
- "Each member had their own private space on the bus" - I prefer "his".
- OK, after all, the band members were all male. --MTBW
- "Assorted personnel changes included " - If these people are additions you need to say so, and if they replaced other people, you need to say that.
- Not always certain who replaced who, but did a minor rephrase -- MTBW
- "Their fan base and concert experience was compared favorably to that of the Grateful Dead." - In lead but not in main text.
- Added to main text. -- MTBW
- That's all for now. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 17:51, 18 August 2017 (UTC)
- @Montanabw: Have you forgotten this? Cwmhiraeth (talk) 18:41, 14 September 2017 (UTC)
- Oops, yes, I'd forgotten! Addressed issues above. Hope this works. Montanabw(talk) 18:40, 20 September 2017 (UTC)
- I'm going to pass this as I consider it meets the GA criteria. The prose is good, the single image is appropriate, the article is broad enough, neutral and stable and it is cited to reliable sources. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 10:13, 21 September 2017 (UTC)