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Talk:My Mother, the Fiend/GA1

< Talk:My Mother, the Fiend
Latest comment: 9 years ago by BenLinus1214 in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Latest comment: 9 years ago2 comments1 person in discussion
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Reviewer: Metal121 (talk · contribs) 06:00, 8 August, 2015 (GMT).

The Lead
  • The lead is well written. The only thing I would suggest changing is the part that says "co-written by Phil Klmer and Dayne Lynne North and directed by Nick Marck". If you read it to yourself, it sounds a little exhaustive with "and" in the sentence twice without no comma's. It may sound better like this: "Directed by Nick Marck, the episode was co-written by Phil Klemmer and Dayna Lynne North.
  • done
  • Where the last section of the lead says "the episode received mostly positive reviews", you could give an example of what one of the critics said. And also, I'd suggest including some information on the viewer ratings this episode received. Although not wholly needed, I'd suggest placing some references in the final paragraph of the lead itself.
  • done However, per WP:LEADCITE, citations are not needed in the lead if they are redundant in the sense of duplicating citations in the body of the article. So I didn't add those refs. Everything else is done though.
Plot
  • The plot is straight forward and fairly detailed. There aren't no issues here.
Arc Significance
  • Can you explain what to me what is mean't by this section? and why it is relevant?
Production
  • Again, the sentence about who it was written by and who directed the episode could do with a comma or some re-wording.
  • done
  • On Hannigan wanting to appear in another episode, I suggest you write it like this: "Hannigan was open to appearing in another episode, but she was unsure whether or not her busy schedule would allow it. She also felt that the character's arc had come to a natural close in this episode".
  • done
  • In the section where Rob Thomas speaks of Hannigan's busy schedule, a semicolon should be used in your sentence, like this: "In an interview, Rob Thomas said that it was difficult to write an episode featuring Hannigan; due to her busy schedule".
  • I don't think that makes sense grammatically--"due to her busy schedule" isn't an independent clause. I changed it to "…Rob Thomas said that due to her busy schedule, it was difficult to write an episode featuring Hannigan."
  • The information underneath the picture of Hannigan could do with some re-wording. I suggest (although its optional): "Thomas said it was difficult trying to write an episode for Hannigan, because of her busy schedule".
  • done
  • Also on the part about the alternate ending, I suggest you rewrite it like this: "Thomas commented that the alternate ending was never going to be the actual conclusion to the episode. He said: "We never seriously considered having that be the ending". I find that by doing this, it is more understandable.
  • done
  • The image with executive producer Joel Silver could do with being made smaller (so that it fits better in the article). But don't worry if you don't know how to do it, I can do that afterwards if you like? I don't feel it will affect the GA nomination of the article, but it will improve the article's layout.
  • done I reduced it--let me know if that looks good.
Reception
Ratings
  • All good, but I'd suggest writing it like this: "marking an increase from "Ahoy, Mateys!" and ranking 101st (out of 112) in the weekly rankings".
  • done
Reviews
  • The critical reception is fine, but it can do with some rewording and alterations to the grammar. I starting the first paragraph like this: "Price Peterson, of TV.com, gave the episode a positive review, writing that he "[l]oved this episode. That reveal was simultaneously shocking and heartbreaking. Plus it took one of the show's most annoying characters (Trina) and made her both sympathetic and heartbreaking." When you go on to mention the other critics, I also suggest putting a comma in between their names, the company that they represent, and their comments. For example, "Rowan Kaiser, of The A.V. Club, lauded Veronica's...", etc.
  • done
Additional comments

BenLinus1214, this article is super close to qualifying for GA status! I have read and re-read through the , and as stated above, the main problems are some issues relating to grammar. The layout of the article is really good and I can see that you've been following the MoS. It shouldn't take you long to do the improvements needed. I'll give you several days, but if you need longer time to do the edits, feel free to message me. Good luck. P.S. Great job on the article! -- Metal121 (talk), 07:30, August 08, 2015 (GMT).

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose, no copyvios, spelling and grammar):   b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):  
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (reference section):   b (citations to reliable sources):   c (OR):  
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects):   b (focused):  
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:  
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:  
  6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales):   b (appropriate use with suitable captions):  
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:  
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