Talk:Nadia Hamza
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Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment
edit
This article is or was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Sunesune123. Peer reviewers: QueenBegonia13, Rainyflower, Genderrights.
Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 01:23, 18 January 2022 (UTC)
Article Draft Feedback
editSome revisions needed.
- You have found great information about this important filmmaker.
- However, much of the information should be reorganized.
- The first paragraph should be re-written to discuss the filmmaker and her importance in more general terms. The detailed information there should be moved into a new “Career” section. Collect all the information about her filmmaking into this “Career” section.
- The Filmography should simply list all the films she has worked on and her role.
- Put all the comments about her style and opinion together, either in the career section or a new section.
Chronophoto (talk) 01:03, 20 February 2018 (UTC) (course instructor)
Article Draft Feedback
edit- This was a very good draft overall. The information was interesting and written in a neutral perspective.
- Try adding in some external links to make the page more accessible for the reader.
- For the Filmography section, just list the films and the year. The other information that you have in this section can be reorganized into the career section.
- I would also suggest separating the early life section and the career section into 2 more organized sections.
- The leading section can be shortened and much of the information from there can be moved into the career section.
- References are good.
Peer Review
editThe very first sentence of 'Early Life and Career' probably does not need to be there since you have already stated in the beginning intro where and when she was born.
It seems that you are missing a citation at the end of the last paragraph of Early Life and Career. Who are you referencing or where did this information come from?
Since we know who the article is about you can refrain from directly stating her last name throughout the article unless it is needed for clarification purposes. However, this is just a personal thought.
Overall, it is very nicely organized and researched! Just make sure to add those references :)