Talk:Nausicaa (opera)/GA1

Latest comment: 1 year ago by Jonathanischoice in topic GA Review

GA Review

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The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.


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Reviewer: Jonathanischoice (talk · contribs) 22:11, 10 October 2023 (UTC)Reply


Hi, I'm planning to review this over the next few days; it looks like it will be straightforward though, given Cinadon36 has already done most of the work! Jon (talk) 22:11, 10 October 2023 (UTC)Reply

I will assess some of the GA criteria and add comments below over the next while, and then leave some time for discussion/editing (I'm fascinated now to track down the Athens recording; duet here)
@Jon, I am glad to see that you, a fellow music-related Wikipedian, are genuinely interested in this article! Recently, I found an Internet Archive link where the whole recording is availabe. I asked User: Diannaa about the copyrights, and whether I could include the link at the External links section, but she knew not. I also found a probably safer to use link, with samples from the official recording. What do you think? Are we to include any of these in the article as "External links"? L'OrfeoSon io 14:37, 20 October 2023 (UTC)Reply
Rate Attribute Review Comment
1. Well-written:
  1a. the prose is clear, concise, and understandable to an appropriately broad audience; spelling and grammar are correct. Minor concerns addressed below
  1b. it complies with the Manual of Style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation. Lead ok; layout ok; w2w ok; fiction n/a; lists, okay as a table (Roles).
2. Verifiable with no original research:
  2a. it contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline. Satisfactory.
  2b. reliable sources are cited inline. All content that could reasonably be challenged, except for plot summaries and that which summarizes cited content elsewhere in the article, must be cited no later than the end of the paragraph (or line if the content is not in prose). Citations are good; § Synopsis is cited once as needed.
  2c. it contains no original research. I'm satisfied there's nothing novel or controversial here that isn't covered in the sources.
  2d. it contains no copyright violations or plagiarism. The copyvio report returns nothing alarming; the 58% match is due to a quotation, which is cited; Synopsis avoids violation.
3. Broad in its coverage:
  3a. it addresses the main aspects of the topic.
  3b. it stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail (see summary style).
  4. Neutral: it represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each.
  5. Stable: it does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute. There's nothing controversial in the talk page; no sign of edit-warring etc.
6. Illustrated, if possible, by media such as images, video, or audio:
  6a. media are tagged with their copyright statuses, and valid non-free use rationales are provided for non-free content. Image tags are sufficient and valid.
  6b. media are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions. Satisfactory use of images.
  7. Overall assessment.

Review comments

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Lead
@Jon, I added {{Use dmy dates}} and {{EngvarB}; do you think that the latter contradicts the {{British English} tag placed at the article's talk page? L'OrfeoSon io 13:41, 20 October 2023 (UTC)Reply
  Done
  Done
The libretto
  • Graves accepted the composer's proposal; from 1956 to 1958 the two of them collaborated to write the opera's libretto could be improved, perhaps "Graves accepted the composer's proposal, and they worked together from 1956 to 1958 on the opera's libretto"
  Done
  • Having established the period 1956-1958 in the previous sentence, "For this purpose" would be clearer as "During this time"
  Done
Music
  • The paragraph discussing the composer's connection of melody to prosody could perhaps link to prosody (music) which covers similar concepts.
@User:Jonathanischoice. In the passage cited, Glanville-Hicks focuses on the linguistic prosody (as expressed in "she had made it possible for every word to be "heard pretty well""), so, in a literal sense, the article to be linked is prosody (linguistics); however, for every word to be "heard pretty well", a certain compositional technique is required, which means that the matter also pertains to musical prosody. So, what wikilink do we go with? L'OrfeoSon io 14:09, 20 October 2023 (UTC)Reply
Perhaps on second thoughts we can leave it as is.
  • thus hinting at the much more massive Greek-speaking audience... is a bit awkward; perhaps "which (appealed to? resonated with?) the primarily Greek-speaking audience of the première"
Oh my, I badly misused the phrase!   Done L'OrfeoSon io 14:16, 20 October 2023 (UTC)Reply
  • "published on Time" should be "in" not "on" (I'm sure it was published in a timely fashion!)
  Done
Athens Festival premiere
  • Link to first instance in prose of Nausicaa (the character) per MOS:L
  Done
  • I think the article undersells the audience reception of the opera by describing it as "well received" (para 4). We could make more of its success, given the description in the recording liner notes: It received three performances at the Festival and was a major success in the international press. Variety wrote: “A ten minute ovation greeted the world premiere of Peggy Glanville-Hicks new opera Nausicaa in the ancient Theatre of Herod Atticus at the Acropolis in the heart of Athens. The cast of 150 won eight curtain calls from the capacity crowd of 4,800 which overflowed into the aisles.” (NWCR695, p. 1)
It's not needed for GA, but it might be fun to track down the 1961 Variety review, perhaps in the IA archive.
  • I think this sounds a bit too final: However, in spite of all its success, the opera was never again produced; perhaps something like "Despite its success, the opera has not yet been produced since its premiere" sounds a little more hopeful; it may be worth noting that Mario Dobernig's 2014 PhD thesis (Trove) involved creating a performance edition of the score.
@Jon, I tried my best; what do you think? L'OrfeoSon io 22:26, 20 October 2023 (UTC)Reply
Good I think - I added a little about the audience reception too.
Synopsis
  Done
  Done
  • Link Greek city state to Polis
  Done
  Done
  Done
  Done
  Done
  Done
  • I suspect "Hercules" should link to Heracles the Greek hero, since Hercules is about the Roman one
  Done

Jon (talk) 22:40, 19 October 2023 (UTC)Reply

@Jon, I couldn't have hoped for a more detailed and insightful review! That is exactly what I wanted, all my errors and omissions traced and listed so that I can spot and fix them, plus some exciting new info to further enrich the article. Thank you! Responding soon. L'OrfeoSon io 13:26, 20 October 2023 (UTC)Reply
All up excellent work! Thanks also for highlighting a sadly neglected opera, and a composer whose works certainly deserve more performances, and no doubt helping with Wikipedia:WikiProject Women too. — Jon (talk) 05:38, 21 October 2023 (UTC)Reply
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.