Talk:Nicole Haislett/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Mike Christie (talk · contribs) 15:15, 24 January 2015 (UTC)

I'll review this. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 15:15, 24 January 2015 (UTC)

• Thanks, Mike. I look forward to your comments and suggestions. Dirtlawyer1 (talk) 15:52, 24 January 2015 (UTC)

• To avoid a single sentence paragraph, how about moving her graduation to the section on her life after swimming, since it does postdate her retirement?

 Done Moved college graduation text to "life after" section. Dirtlawyer1 (talk) 17:15, 24 January 2015 (UTC)

• The lead is a touch short -- I think a sentence or two could be added, perhaps mentioning her world records.

 Done Re-arranged and expanded lead section, including mentioning her American and world records, as well her international medal totals. Dirtlawyer1 (talk) 17:15, 24 January 2015 (UTC)

• "Afterward, she studied to be a chef at the Florida Culinary Institute in West Palm Beach, Florida, and she formerly worked as the dining room manager and activities director at an assisted living community for seniors": this would read more naturally in chronological sequence.

 Done Tweaked sentence to clarify that sequence of events was already in chronological order. Dirtlawyer1 (talk) 17:15, 24 January 2015 (UTC)

That's everything I can see -- the article is in great shape. I'll put the nomination on hold. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 16:26, 24 January 2015 (UTC)

@Mike Christie: Please let me know if you have any other comments, questions or suggestions. Dirtlawyer1 (talk) 17:15, 24 January 2015 (UTC)