Talk:On the Low/GA1

GA Review

Latest comment: 2 years ago15 comments2 people in discussion

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Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 07:31, 5 April 2022 (UTC)Reply

Good Article review progress box

Criteria: 1a. prose ( ) 1b. MoS ( ) 2a. ref layout ( ) 2b. cites WP:RS ( ) 2c. no WP:OR ( ) 2d. no WP:CV ( )

3a. broadness ( ) 3b. focus ( ) 4. neutral ( ) 5. stable ( ) 6a. free or tagged images ( ) 6b. pics relevant ( )

Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed

This article is nearly two months old, making a review wholeheartedly due! --K. Peake 07:31, 5 April 2022 (UTC)Reply

Replace hlist with bullet points per Template:Infobox song
List as Elof Loelv under producer(s) since this is not a track listing
"who produced the track." → "who handled the production." and this should be the second sentence of the lead instead
Add a sentence inbetween credits and release here mentioning that the song was one of the first written for the album and when the singer previewed it
""On the Low" is a downtempo" → "it is a downtempo"
Pipe minimal to Minimal music
"the single appeared below" → "the song appeared below"
"chart at number twelve on" → "chart, reaching number 12 on" per MOS:NUM
Wikilink lyric video to itself per MOS:LINK2SECT
"on Nyhetsmorgon and a session" → "on Nyhetsmorgon in 2018 and a 2020 session"
Pipe acoustic to Acoustic music

Done. Let me know if the added sentence works or not. Pancake (talk) 15:23, 6 April 2022 (UTC)Reply

That is a proper addition to the lead, though I copyedited the preview part to avoid overusage of it. --K. Peake 06:43, 8 April 2022 (UTC)Reply

Remove comma after third studio album
"for the album,[2] and" → "for the album and" moving [2] solely to the end of the sentence
The two tracks being the only ones written by her and Loelv is not sourced
"said that the two spent long days" → "said that the two spent heavy time" per the source
Pipe minimal to Minimal music
"out of all tracks" → "out of all the tracks"
Pipe chorus to Refrain
"when it came to melody." → "in terms of melody."
"she labelled it" → "she labelled the track"

Wikilink falsetto on the audio sample text
"minimal and detailed production backed" → "minimal and detailed production, backed" on the audio sample, with the pipe
Pipe bird calls to Bird vocalization
Pipe drums to Drum kit
Remove comma after percussion
Remove speech marks for minimalistic since this is an encyclopedic term
"and NME writer Hannah Mylrea characterized" → "whereas NME writer Hannah Mylrea characterized
"in lines such as" → "in lines such as,"
"the closing bird calls "transform Styrke's" → "the closing bird calls transform "Styrke's" per the source's wording

The skateboard being over a yellow background is not sourced
Wikilink lyric video to itself per MOS:LINK2SECT
The source mentions her performing the song in a small room and no bottom part is sourced for the lyrics
"Lisa Hultengren directed the video with" → "Lisa Hultengren directed the video, with"
Pipe acoustic to Acoustic music
"She learnt how to" → "Styrke learnt how to"

"gave it a "Song of the Day" designation while writing," → "gave the track a "Song of the Day" designation, writing,"
Mention how Mylrea highlighted the vocals in the NME review
Start a new sentence at the Simon Österhof review because the NME one will be long enough on its own once expanded
"found it "irresistible"" → "found the song "irresistible""
"whispering working well" → "whispering work[s] well" in this context, as otherwise it does not read correctly
"He wrote, "The careful" → "He wrote that "the careful"
"more to discover."" → "more to discover"." per MOS:QUOTE (this is not a full sentence as the source shows)
"the song suffered from" → "the song suffers from"
"below the top 100 at number twelve on" → "at number 12 on" per MOS:NUM (previous part removal because it has already been stated)

Use {{spaced ndash}} so there is the right space between credits and personnel.

Are you sure programming is listed before synthesizer under credits; I can't check since I don't have an account?

I'm fairly inactive on Wiki these days. What tool is this? Pancake (talk) 15:23, 6 April 2022 (UTC)Reply

On hold until all of the issues are fixed and in all honesty, that went quick because this is a quality article; congrats! --K. Peake 09:13, 5 April 2022 (UTC)Reply

✓ Pass now, very good job and I would have checked through this sooner if you'd have given me a ping! --K. Peake 06:43, 8 April 2022 (UTC)Reply