Talk:One Kiss/GA1
Latest comment: 4 years ago by Kyle Peake in topic GA Review
GA Review
editThe following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 07:23, 15 September 2020 (UTC)
Good Article review progress box
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I will start reviewing the article later today, love this track! --K. Peake 07:23, 15 September 2020 (UTC)
Infobox and lead
edit- Can't 2018 be a recording date in the infobox since the body says about this?
- WP:OVERLINK of Calvin Harris under songwriter(s)
- "and record producer, Calvin Harris, and" → "and record producer Calvin Harris, and"
- "Dua Lipa, released for" → "Dua Lipa. The song was released for"
- "standalone single through" → "standalone single, through" with the appropriate target
- "also handling the production." → "solely handling the production."
- ""One Kiss" spans" → "It spans"
- "genres, while also incorporating UK garage," → "genres, with UK garage,"
- "It features horns, organs, and a synth-line," → "Horns, organs, and a synth-line are featured within the song,"
- Target house to House music
- "and being both's" → "and standing as both's"
- "It also peaked at number 26" → "It further peaked at number 26"
- "and is certified triple and" → "and has since been certified triple and"
- "respectively in the United Kingdom and" → "in the United Kingdom and" since respectively should only be used once in this sentence
- "and it is certified multi-platinum in 13 countries," → "and has been certified multi-platinum in 13 others,"
- "The accompanying music video for "One Kiss" was directed" → "An accompanying music video was directed"
- "premiered exclusively on Apple Music on" → "premiered through Apple Music exclusively on" with the appropriate wikilink
- "It features Lipa in front a green screen" → "The video features Lipa in front of a green screen" with the target
- "appears as her waiter." → "appears as the singer's waiter."
- "Critics praised the visual's aesthetics" → "The visual received praise from critics, who highlighted the aesthetics"
- "and Spotify vertical video." → "and Spotify-released vertical video."
- "promoted the single with" → "promoted "One Kiss" with"
- "including ones on" → "including ones for"
Done
Background and release
edit- "shortly after Lipa released" → "shortly after Lipa released her single" with the target
- "Shortly after he contacted" → "Shortly afterwards, he contacted"
- Remove wikilink on Jamaica
- "asking if she would like" → "and asked if she would like"
- "which she agreed to. Lipa" → "which Lipa agreed to. She"
- "to get a feel for" → "to get a feeling for"
- "was written by Harris, Lipa and" → "was written by the two and"
- "although, Harris stated that he" → "although Harris stated that he had"
- "God's Eyes Studios, in Los Angeles, with" → "God's Eyes Studios in Los Angeles, with him handling"
- Target mixing to Audio mixing (recorded music)
- "also by Harris at the same studio, and mastering by" → "as well at the same studio, while the song was mastered by" with the target
- "to one that features a QR code" → "to one featuring a QR code" with the wikilink
- "When scanned, it reads" → "When scanned, the code read:"
- "On 2 April, both artists" → "The following month, both artists"
- "and release date." → "and the release date."
- "on 6 April 2018 and" → "on 6 April 2018, and later released as a"
- "both through" → "with both releases being through"
- "It was sent to" → "It was also sent to"
- "The song was included" → "The song was ultimately included"
- "eponymous debut studio album," → "eponymous debut studio album"
- "released 19 October 2018" → "released on 19 October 2018"
Done
Music and lyrics
edit- You should add ref(s) on the audio sample to back up the text
- Should the brass also be mentioned?
- ""One Kiss" is a" → "Musically, "One Kiss" is a"
- "while also incorporating" → "while incorporating"
- Remove wikilink on instrumental
- Remove wikilink on piano
- "which were also categorized as that," → "that were also categorized as such,"
- "instrumental intro containing" → "instrumental intro, containing"
- "before Lipa begins singing" → "before Lipa begins to sing"
- "and tropical house horns," → "alongside tropical house horns,"
- "which are first heard" → "which are initially heard"
- "sound as though they have" → "were described as sounding as though they have"
- Target section to Section (music)
- "before just Lipa's vocals are heard for the first part of the hook." → "before solely Lipa's vocals are heard on the first part of the chorus."
- Target should only be to the G note wiki once
- "using a kiss to trigger" → "mentioning a kiss being used to trigger"
Done
Remixes
edit- Move this to being the section directly below Live performances
- "The first remix released was one" → "The first remix was one"
- "earlier at the" → "earlier at the 2018"
- "as his sound" → "as reminiscent of his sound"
- "The final result is a house" → "The remix is a house"
- "while also featuring bass house" → "while it also features bass house"
- "an underground basement" → "has an underground basement"
- No source calls it tech house; maybe just call it a house track?
- My mistake, I forgot to cite a source there. I added it there. LOVI33 18:33, 18 September 2020 (UTC)
- "it includes ominous" → "the remix includes ominous"
- "He also changed" → "Zhu also changed"
- "with it being released" → "with his remix being released"
- "It reimagines the song" → "The remix reimagines "One Kiss""
- "with Heldens' signature bass sound and organic elements." → "with organic elements and Heldens' signature bass sound."
- "It adds ghostly horns," → "It also features ghostly horns,"
- Mention that the contrast of Lipa's voice is on the hook/chorus (whichever you want to call it)
- "organ synths to the original." → "and organ synths alongside her voice."
- "on 8 June 2018 and 15 June 2018," → "on 8 June and 15 June 2018,"
- "The r3hab remix features" → "The R3hab remix features"
- None of the info from this sentence is backed up by [57]
- Source: "Big synth horn hits and shimmering atmospheres". LOVI33 18:33, 18 September 2020 (UTC)
- Oh sorry, my bad there! --K. Peake 16:11, 19 September 2020 (UTC)
- Can you add any info on Khan's remix?
- No, I haven't been able to find any reliable sources covering that remix. But its worth mentioning since it was released for the song's promotion. LOVI33 18:33, 18 September 2020 (UTC)
- Remove target on EP
- "The stripped down Patrick Topping remix" → "Topping's stripped down remix"
- "as tech house and" → "as a tech house track and"
Done
Critical reception
edit- "regarded it as" → "regarded "One Kiss" as"
- "in 2016"," → "in 2016,""
- "writing that it" → "writing that the song"
- "stated it will" → "stated the song is"
- Dancing Astronaut should not be italicised
- "Of the same magazine," → "For the same magazine,"
- "vocals complimenting the song's" → "vocals and complimented the song's"
- "concluded by writing" → "concluded by admitting that"
- "as well as labelling the beat" → "while labelling the beat"
- Target Complex to Complex (magazine) per MOS:LINK2SECT
- Remove Forbes contributor review per WP:RSP
- Third para can be merged with the second since it will be of a relatively short length once Forbes has been removed
- Add the name of the Vice reviewer
- "despite its inability to" → "despite an inability to"
- Either remove the brackets release year or add it with [] around
- The Glamour ranking belongs in the Accolades section instead
Done
Accolades
edit- This can stay as its own section despite the above being trimmed somewhat, since it is very large on its own
- The year-end lists should be written out in prose, since five do not warrant a table and add the Glamour ranking to the same para, directly after them in it though
- A second para should be added to this section, which should be used to summarise some of the main awards and nominations but keep that table, however
- All columns should be sortable apart from the ref one
- Category → Award
Done
Commercial performance
edit- The term "dethroning" is not encyclopedic; try using something else like "replacing", for example
- ""Nice for What" (2018), becoming" → ""Nice for What" (2018) while becoming"
- "single following "New Rules" (2017)." → "single, following "New Rules" (2017) for the latter artist."
- "in the top spot, being dethroned by" → "at the top spot, ultimately being succeeded by"
- "Because of that," → "Due to the eight consecutive weeks,"
- "both artists longest running" → "both artists' longest running"
- "of 53 weeks on the chart," → "of 53 weeks on the UK Singles Chart,"
- "departing it" → "departing the chart"
- "from the" → "by the"
- "for selling 1.8 million track-equivalent units." → "for selling 1.8 million track-equivalent units in the UK."
- "reached the summit of charts" → "topped the charts"
- "to eventually peak at" → "going on to peak at"
- "its eight week, keeping that position" → "its eighth week, remaining at the position"
- "It was certified 5x platinum" → "The song was certified quintuple platinum by the Australian Recording Industry Association (ARIA)"
- "350,000 track-equivalent unit sales in the country." → "sales of 350,000 track-equivalent units in the country."
- "number 6" → "number six"
- New Zealand and Canada should be swapped in their sentence, since Oceania comes before North America in this order as the third para is the US
- Mention that the New Zealand position was on the NZ Singles Chart with the target
- Identify Canada's chart as the Canadian Hot 100 and wikilink
- "In the United States, "One Kiss" debuted" → "In the US, "One Kiss" debuted"
- "to a peak of 26," → "to a peak of number 26,"
- "On American radio charts," → "On US radio charts," with the target, since America is two entire continents not just the US
- "and 32 respectively on the Adult Top 40, Mainstream Top 40, Rhythmic charts," → "and 32 on the Adult Top 40, Mainstream Top 40, Rhythmic charts," since "respectively" is only needed once in this sentence
- "It additionally topped the" → "The song additionally topped the US"
- "and reached number 2 on the" → "and reached number two on"
- "for track-equivalent sales of 2 million units." → "for sales of 2,000,000 certified units in the US."
Done
Music video
editRelease
edit- Retitle to Background
- "and a Spotify vertical video." → "and a vertical video, the latter of which was released via Spotify."
- "playing two couples" → "which plays two couples"
- "premiered exclusively on" → "premiered exclusively through"
- "and then on" → "later being released to"
- Write out here who the video was directed by since this is known; also, is there any background info such as how the director became involved with Harris?
- All I could find is that he previously directed many visuals of Harris'. LOVI33 23:50, 18 September 2020 (UTC)
- That is fine for background info, nice job. --K. Peake 16:11, 19 September 2020 (UTC)
Done
Synopsis
edit- Img looks good
- "standing a blue robe" → "standing in a blue robe"
- Target green screen to Chroma key
- "seen swaying behind her" → "seen swaying in the background"
- "wearing teal sequin tops" → "while wearing teal sequin tops"
- "She is then seen dancing" → "Lipa then dances"
- "as a sun rises" → "as the Sun rises" since there is only one Sun in the sky
- "In the next scenes," → "In the following scenes,"
- "on a fluffy white rug and sits" → "when lying on a fluffy white rug and also sits"
- "lounge chair, wearing" → "lounge chair and wearing"
- "and sunglasses, watching" → "and sunglasses as she watches"
- "sits on the diving board," → "sits on the board,"
- Target martini to Martini (cocktail)
- "which she later takes an" → "which Lipa goes on to take an"
- "which he shuts off." → "who shuts it off."
Done
Reception
edit- "while summarizing it writing that it" → "while summarizing by writing that it"
- "Of the same magazine, Hannah Mylrea named it" → "In the same magazine, Hannah Mylrea named the video"
- "by writing it is" → "by writing that the music video is"
- Wikilink Instagram on this first mention
- "praised the puppets, writing they" → "praised the puppets in the video, writing that they"
- Target Missguided.co.uk to Missguided
- Remove wikilink on Instagram
- The awards and nominations should be written out in prose, since four do not warrant a table
Done
Credits and personnel
edit- Any specific order here?
- The order shown is the order that appears in the source. LOVI33 23:50, 18 September 2020 (UTC)
Live performances
edit- "first time on" → "first time during an episode of"
- "She wore she wore" → "For the performance, she wore"
- "with matching-colored tights" → "with matching-coloured tights from"
- "opening ceremony preceding the" → "opening ceremony that preceded the"
- "on 26 May in" → "on 26 May of that year in"
- Target Kiev to Kyiv
- "of Lipa's Self-Titled tour (2017–2018)." → "of The Self-Titled Tour (2017–2018) by Lipa."
- "Lipa performed the song as a mash-up with St. Vincent who performed "Masseduction" (2018) at the 61st Annual Grammy Awards." → "Lipa performed the song as a mash-up with St. Vincent at the 61st Annual Grammy Awards, who performed his single "Masseduction" (2018)."
- "medley with Sam Smith performing "Promises" (2018) and" → "medley that saw Sam Smith perform "Promises" (2018), and"
- "on 20 February 2019." → "on 20 February."
Done
Track listings
edit- Under the track listings (not the titles of them), shouldn't capitalisation be applied to words like Remix where it is present under the citations?
- The first remixes release should not be identified as an EP, only the second should
- Remove target on 12-inch vinyl
Done
Credits and personnel
edit- The sub-sections are pointless; split the three different types of info by using sub-headings instead
- Wikilink Los Angeles
- Wikilink Devon
- Target Warner Bros Records to Warner Records
- Is Universal Music GmbH a typo or not?
- That is what is said in the liner notes. I'm not really sure what it means. LOVI33 02:53, 19 September 2020 (UTC)
Done
Charts
editWeekly charts
edit- Should both of the Columbia charts be included or only one?
- Both seem notable. LOVI33 03:04, 19 September 2020 (UTC)
- Target HRT to Hrvatska radiotelevizija
- Remove the Czech Republic and Slovakia radio charts
- Greece (IFPI Greece) → Greece International Digital Singles (IFPI)
- Israel peak is not displayed by the citation... or is there something to press that I missed?
- Not displayed for me either and I can't find a source to back it up so I'm going to remove it. LOVI33 03:04, 19 September 2020 (UTC)
- Target Mexico Airplay to List of Billboard Mexico Airplay number ones
- Target Airplay 100 to Romanian record charts
- Russia Airplay (Tophit) → Russia (Tophit)
- Not done per Template:single chart
- Are you sure that the year-end chart isn't Russia Airplay too? --K. Peake 16:11, 19 September 2020 (UTC)
- Kyle Peake, it looks as though it is. I have changed it. LOVI33 17:03, 19 September 2020 (UTC)
- Yeah that was why I initially questioned the chart; the lack of consistency was somewhat confusing to be honest and thanks for clarifying! --K. Peake 17:57, 19 September 2020 (UTC)
- Target RIAS to Recording Industry Association (Singapore)
- South Korea International (Gaon) → South Korea Download (Gaon)
Done
Year-end charts
edit- Wikilink Galgalatz
- Poland (ZPAV) → Poland (Polish Airplay Top 100)
Done
Decade-end charts
edit- Good
Certifications
edit- Good
Release history
edit- Label → Label(s)
- The releases named as various need to have multiple citations to verify that claim
- Not done. For services like Beatport and Tidal, when one goes onto their website, they don't have a specific country/territory defined. You can also see with the link of the iTunes ones that no territory is defined as this is from iTunes 2018. So therefore it is kind of universal. Even if it wasn't I couldn't have multiple citations as all have been removed from all platforms after the remix EP release. There was one Apple Music one that I have done though. LOVI33 13:33, 19 September 2020 (UTC)
- Thanks for the clarification, this is relatively good. --K. Peake 16:11, 19 September 2020 (UTC)
- Wikilink Jauz
- Wikilink Zhu
- Wikilink Oliver Heldens
- Wikilink R3hab
- Wikilink Valentino Khan
- Remixes and Remixes EP should be in two separate rows for the versions; identify the first as Remixes and the second as Remixes EP sine only one is an EP
Done
See also
edit- Good
References
edit- Copyvio score looks fine at 21.3%
- Make sure all of these are archived by using the tool
- Target Nova FM to Nova (radio network) on ref 3
- Target Complex to Complex (magazine) on ref 4
- MOS:CAPS issues with refs 8 and 89
- Target MTV to MTV (British and Irish TV channel) on ref 9
- Wikilink BBC on ref 19
- Remove or replace refs 24 and 77 per WP:RSP
- I have doubts regarding the reliability of ref 26, since they have very few editors
- Removed. LOVI33 14:07, 19 September 2020 (UTC)
- Cite Much as publisher instead for ref 34
- Cite Dancing Astronaut as publisher instead for refs 36, 59, 65, 71 and 75
- Cite Your EDM as publisher instead for refs 40 and 56
- Ref 41's title is not formatted correctly; there is a missing space between Calvin and Harris
- Hot New Hip Hop → HotNewHipHop on ref 46
- Are you sure ref 50 doesn't violate WP:RSSM?
- Apparently it is just "aimed" for students, not written by them so I would say no. LOVI33 14:07, 19 September 2020 (UTC)
- Remove or replace ref 51 per WP:RSSM
- Refs 55, 60, 63, 67, 68, 153, 154, 155 and 156 should cite in the same format as ref 15
- Not done per above. LOVI33 14:07, 19 September 2020 (UTC)
- Target DJ Magazine to DJ Mag on ref 72
- MTV UK → MTV on ref 73
- WP:OVERLINK of BBC on ref 84
- Cite Gulf News as work/website instead for ref 88
- MOS:QWQ issues with ref 92
- WP:OVERLINK of Popjustice on ref 94
- WP:OVERLINK of Sony Music on ref 99
- Target HRT to Hrvatska radiotelevizija on ref 108 and fix MOS:CAPS issues
- Remove Greece from the title of ref 112 and cite IFPI Greece as publisher with the wikilink
- Media Forest Israel → Media Forest on ref 115 with the wikilink, and if there isn't any way to access the peak that you know which I haven't found yet then remove or replace this; just hoping there is an explanation though
- I removed it above. LOVI33 14:07, 19 September 2020 (UTC)
- The official lebanese Top 20 → The Official Lebanese Top 20 (as publisher instead) on ref 117 with the wikilink
- Remove SloTop50 from the title of ref 125 and cite as the publisher, with the wikilink
- Cite United Press International as publisher instead for ref 139
- WP:OVERLINK of Australian Recording Industry Association on ref 159
- WP:OVERLINK of National-Report on refs 166 and 198
- Fix the accessdate of ref 168
- MOS:CAPS issues with ref 171's publisher
- WP:OVERLINK of Billboard on refs 173 and 181
- WP:OVERLINK of Monitor Latino on refs 183 and 188
- Wikilink Recording Industry Association (Singapore) on ref 190
- Target Gaon Chart to Gaon Music Chart on ref 192
- Remove Monitor Latino from the title of ref 199 and fix WP:OVERLINK
- Remove PROPHON from the title of ref 204
- Cite GfK Entertainment as publisher instead for ref 210 and target to GfK Entertainment charts
- Target Mahasz to Association of Hungarian Record Companies on ref 211
- WP:OVERLINK of Mahasz on refs 212, 213, 214 and 236
- WP:OVERLINK of Kiss FM on ref 223 and delete the trans title since that is not used anywhere else in this article
- WP:OVERLINK of Tophit on refs 224 and 229
- Remove SloTop50 from the title of ref 225 and fix WP:OVERLINK
- Target PROMUSICAE to Productores de Música de España on ref 226
- MOS:CAPS issues with ref 241
- Fix the title of ref 252
- promusicae.es → PROMUSICAE on ref 253
- Remove Hung Medien from ref 254
- Not done per Template:Certification Table Entry
Done
External links
edit- Live on The Graham Norton Show → "One Kiss" (Live on The Graham Norton Show)
Done
Final comments and verdict
edit- On hold after a long review, this article is very large but you have some good writing skills. If you are confused about any of the changes that I requested or have reasons they should not be implemented, do not feel free to reach out! --K. Peake 14:16, 17 September 2020 (UTC)
- Hey Kyle Peake, thanks for another amazing review. I have addressed all your comments. Let me know if you have any concerns or if there is anything else I need to do. LOVI33 14:09, 19 September 2020 (UTC)
- LOVI33 One chart query, that is it. Good job here mostly, though! --K. Peake 16:11, 19 September 2020 (UTC)
- LOVI33 ✓ Pass now after you have made that one final fix, great job on such a quick response for this large article and I am honoured that you feel so highly of my review itself!!! --K. Peake 17:57, 19 September 2020 (UTC)
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.