Talk:Patriot Games (Family Guy)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: The Flash ^{talk} 20:00, 14 November 2009 (UTC)

Opening comment: As requested. The Flash ^{talk} 20:00, 14 November 2009 (UTC)

Lead

• "It originally aired on Fox on January 29, 2006. The episode has a sports-theme and originally aired around the time of Super Bowl XL." -> "[...]January 29, 2006, around the time of Super Bowl XL, which fit the sports theme of the episode."
• "Peter goes to his high school reunion and meets Tom Brady." -> "In it, Peter goes[...]"
• "Stewie becomes a bookie and Brian loses[...]" -> "Meanwhile, Stewie becomes[...]"
• "Peter wins many games for the Patriots but is fired for showboating and is traded to a team in London called the Silly Nannies. Peter plays versus the Patriots and loses, and returns home." -> move this to before the Stewie and Brian stuff.
• "Jay Leno, Tom Brady, Carol Channing, Bob Costas and Troy Brown all guest star as themselves." -> "[...]all guest starred as themselves."
• All done--Pedro J. ^{the rookie} 20:41, 14 November 2009 (UTC)

Plot summary

• "Peter is soon fired for showboating: i.e. driving on to the field then performing a massively-choreographed version of the song "Shipoopi" after making one touchdown[...]" -> this is just un-neutral, to me. Try something like this: "Peter is soon fired for showboating, driving on to the field then performing a massively-choreographed version of the song "Shipoopi" after making one touchdown."
• done--Pedro J. ^{the rookie} 20:38, 14 November 2009 (UTC)
• [...]and he is traded[...]" -> "He is traded to the[...]"
• done--Pedro J. ^{the rookie} 20:38, 14 November 2009 (UTC)
• "Stewie becomes a sports bookie[...]" -> "Meanwhile Stewie becomes[...]"
• done--Pedro J. ^{the rookie} 20:38, 14 November 2009 (UTC)
• Combine the last two paragraphs (too short alone)
• done--Pedro J. ^{the rookie} 20:38, 14 November 2009 (UTC)

Production

• Move the Mike Henry image to the right, please.
• done--Pedro J. ^{the rookie} 20:34, 14 November 2009 (UTC)
• You list three directors here, but only one in the template. Add the other two to the template.
• done--Pedro J. ^{the rookie} 20:34, 14 November 2009 (UTC)
• You already linked to Mike Tyson in the Plot summary.
• done--Pedro J. ^{the rookie} 20:34, 14 November 2009 (UTC)

Cultural references

• The thing about the Dallas Cowboys at the end of the section is unsourced — cut it.
• done--Pedro J. ^{the rookie} 20:35, 14 November 2009 (UTC)

That scene in which Brian tells Tom Brady he fell down the stairs is a White Chicks (2004 movie) reference, isn't it? —Preceding unsigned comment added by LupusRexRgis (talk • contribs) 11:39, 7 May 2011 (UTC)

It's not specific to that movie. It's a common euphemism for being beaten up and not wanting to implicate the person who did it that long predates White Chicks. Daniel Case (talk) 21:10, 20 December 2017 (UTC)

Reception

• This whole thing needs expansion. Can you please add to what the two reviews actually say? Take, for example, The Great Wife Hope or Survival of the Fittest (The Spectacular Spider-Man).

Is that better i can't find any more recep.--Pedro J. ^{the rookie} 21:33, 14 November 2009 (UTC)

Images

• All good.

Final say

GA review (see here for criteria)

1. It is reasonably well written.

   a (prose): b (MoS):

   I've done a copyedit of the reception section, but I'd suggest moving the note Seth makes to right after the ratings info.

Done--Pedro J. ^{the rookie} 00:14, 15 November 2009 (UTC)

1. It is factually accurate and verifiable.

   a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):

2. It is broad in its coverage.

   a (major aspects): b (focused):

   Both this and this list the episode on a top ten list. They should be included for this article to contain all info available.

• done--Pedro J. ^{the rookie} 00:34, 15 November 2009 (UTC)

• Refs 9 and 10 are still missing author info, though. The Flash ^{talk} 01:15, 15 November 2009 (UTC)

• done.--Pedro J. ^{the rookie} 01:20, 15 November 2009 (UTC)

1. It follows the neutral point of view policy.

   Fair representation without bias:

2. It is stable.

   No edit wars, etc.:

3. It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.

   a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):

4. Overall:

   Pass/Fail:

   Almost there. The Flash ^{talk} 00:03, 15 November 2009 (UTC)

Thanks for the review--Pedro J. ^{the rookie} 01:22, 15 November 2009 (UTC)

No prob; thanks for taking care of the issues, consider the article passed. The Flash ^{talk} 01:32, 15 November 2009 (UTC)