Talk:Peter Hall (RNZAF officer)/GA1
Latest comment: 1 year ago by Pickersgill-Cunliffe in topic GA Review
GA Review
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Reviewer: Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk · contribs) 16:06, 19 September 2023 (UTC)
I'll take a look at this shortly. Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk) 16:06, 19 September 2023 (UTC)
Prelim
edit- Medal bar is duplicated in the lede
- Fixed. Zawed (talk) 09:57, 29 September 2023 (UTC)
- Article is stable
- File:Peter Hall, RNZAF (cropped).jpg needs USPD
- Added. Zawed (talk) 10:13, 29 September 2023 (UTC)
- Earwig reports copyvio unlikey
Lede and infobox
edit- Main text does not say he died in Cumbria
- Initially removed, then re-added when I found a source for it. Zawed (talk) 10:13, 29 September 2023 (UTC)
- Hall spent about half his service in 140 Sqn, I think it appropriate to add it in the infobox
- Done. Zawed (talk) 10:13, 29 September 2023 (UTC)
Main text
edit- Clergyman, not clergy man
- Done. Zawed (talk) 10:13, 29 September 2023 (UTC)
- Where was 140 Squadron based?
- My print sources for RAF squadrons only cover the fighter units so I have added a little bit from an online source. It doesn't have much. Zawed (talk) 10:13, 29 September 2023 (UTC)
- Link sorties (and where were they?)
- Linked. Zawed (talk) 10:13, 29 September 2023 (UTC)
- "Hall and his navigator were credited"
- Fixed. Zawed (talk) 10:13, 29 September 2023 (UTC)
- "but also carrying out"
- Fixed. Zawed (talk) 10:13, 29 September 2023 (UTC)
- "His success was accidental" any more details available? How does one accidentally shoot down an aircraft?
- Have added a little more on this. Zawed (talk) 10:13, 29 September 2023 (UTC)
- "award of a Bar" no need to capitalise
- I'm not sure on this. The template for postnominals captalises it and I think I have been pinged on another article for rendering it as lower case. Zawed (talk) 10:13, 29 September 2023 (UTC)
References
edit- References look good. AGF with print sources.
@Zawed: Hi, that's all I've got. Will await your reply. Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk) 14:53, 27 September 2023 (UTC)
- @Pickersgill-Cunliffe: thanks for the review, I have made a number of edits in respond to your feedback and replied above. Cheers, Zawed (talk) 10:13, 29 September 2023 (UTC)
- @Zawed: Passing this article as satisfying the GA criteria. Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk) 13:33, 29 September 2023 (UTC)