Talk:R2K: The Concert/Archive 1
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Archive 1 |
Did you know nomination
- The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
The result was: promoted by SL93 (talk) 13:52, 19 June 2022 (UTC)
... that Regine Velasquez's aerial performance (pictured) during R2K: The Concert was inspired by the opening segment of Paula Abdul's Under My Spell Tour, which she saw at the Folk Arts Theater in Manila?Source: February 19, 2019. " Regine Velasquez-Alcasid looks back on her R2K concert".'Jeepney TV interview (in Tagalog) – via YouTube. 00:05 minutes in. Translation "I saw Paula Abdul’s concert and she was flying [with wires], it was at the Folk Arts Theater, and I was so impressed, so I told myself, I’ll do that too"; Long, Ernie. (August 2, 1992). Paula Abdul's show, short but spellbinding. "She began the event singing the title song to her recent hit album "Spellbound" by being pulled from beneath the stage to the top of the stage by wires"
Created by Pseud 14 (talk). Self-nominated at 17:56, 15 May 2022 (UTC).
- The article is new enough, has no unsourced claims or any issues otherwise, AGF about the Tagalog source and video. I do think the hook could be shorter so I would suggest ALT1.--NØ 10:07, 6 June 2022 (UTC)
ALT1: ... that Regine Velasquez's aerial performance (pictured) during R2K: The Concert was inspired by the opening segment of Paula Abdul's Under My Spell Tour?
Source: February 19, 2019. " Regine Velasquez-Alcasid looks back on her R2K concert".'Jeepney TV interview (in Tagalog) – via YouTube. 00:05 minutes in. Translation "I saw Paula Abdul’s concert and she was flying [with wires], it was at the Folk Arts Theater, and I was so impressed, so I told myself, I’ll do that too"; Long, Ernie. (August 2, 1992). Paula Abdul's show, short but spellbinding. "She began the event singing the title song to her recent hit album "Spellbound" by being pulled from beneath the stage to the top of the stage by wires"
- Suggesting an ALT for @Pseud14 and MaranoFan :) theleekycauldron (talk • contribs) (she/they) 09:37, 15 June 2022 (UTC)
- ALT2: ... that during R2K: The Concert, Regine Velasquez was lifted by wires (pictured) as if she were flying towards the audience?
- Bad ping to Pseud 14 theleekycauldron (talk • contribs) (she/they) 09:38, 15 June 2022 (UTC)
- Works for me @Theleekycauldron and MaranoFan: Thanks. Pseud 14 (talk) 12:54, 15 June 2022 (UTC)
I'm doing a re-review to let preppers know if this article is ready to be promoted:
General: Article is new enough and long enough |
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Policy: Article is sourced, neutral, and free of copyright problems |
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Hook: Hook has been verified by provided inline citation |
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Image: Image is freely licensed, used in the article, and clear at 100px. |
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QPQ: Done. |
Overall: ALT2 approved Z1720 (talk) 15:19, 18 June 2022 (UTC)
Copyedit request
Hey Pseud 14, doing my thing as usual here:
—Tenryuu 🐲 ( 💬 • 📝 ) 19:49, 7 June 2022 (UTC)Announced in January, and held during two consecutive nights in April 2000 at the Araneta Coliseum in Quezon City, the concerts were part of Velasquez's campaign in support of her tenth studio album R2K (1999).
Looking at the concert synopsis, was it just the same concert being performed twice? The subject seems to be about one concert rather an actual series.
- Actually your right, I was ambivalent on whether to treat as one or not. Should just be treated as singlar then.
- Done. —Tenryuu 🐲 ( 💬 • 📝 ) 01:34, 9 June 2022 (UTC)
—Tenryuu 🐲 ( 💬 • 📝 ) 19:49, 7 June 2022 (UTC)[T]he concerts were her first performance in a large-scale indoor arena production.
Similar to above. Should this be treated in the singular?
- Agree with above to be treated as singular.
- Done. —Tenryuu 🐲 ( 💬 • 📝 ) 01:34, 9 June 2022 (UTC)
Concert synopsis: This seems too detailed, especially with all the costume changes. Unless there's something notable about costume pieces, I think those can be omitted.—Tenryuu 🐲 ( 💬 • 📝 ) 19:49, 7 June 2022 (UTC)
- I've made a few edits to remove the costume changes that are not necessary. But feel free to edit as you find fit.
- Done. I removed most of them. The airborne suspension seems fine to mention, so I left the costume talked about there in. —Tenryuu 🐲 ( 💬 • 📝 ) 01:34, 9 June 2022 (UTC)
—Tenryuu 🐲 ( 💬 • 📝 ) 19:49, 7 June 2022 (UTC)In retrospect, Elvin Luciano from CNN Philippines called it "the most iconic image" of the singer, while Lo termed it a "decidedly daring or risky action".
Emphasis added, wikilink removed. I'm not sure the emphasised phrase is being used correctly; what are you trying to convey by saying in retrospect? It means to look backwards (at a past event).
- I meant it to be a reference to the CNN source as being retrospective, since this was a description years later looking back at her career. But I agree this can be removed so it doesn't sound ambiguous, as I have also added a separate review by Lo.
- Done. I switched the two around and added a time phrase, which should get the point across clearly. —Tenryuu 🐲 ( 💬 • 📝 ) 01:34, 9 June 2022 (UTC)
—Tenryuu 🐲 ( 💬 • 📝 ) 19:49, 7 June 2022 (UTC)Cited by a foreign magazine as one of the best shows in Asia in the last 25 years [...]
This is closely paraphrased from the synopsis of the source video. Which magazine? As it is it comes off as promotional.
- I could not find the actual source, I do know it was from an article of New Strait Times, so we can probably just remove then if it comes off being promotional.
- Done. I removed it as I'm not sure what value the sentence had encyclopedically. Interested readers will see it if they click on the reference, anyway. —Tenryuu 🐲 ( 💬 • 📝 ) 01:34, 9 June 2022 (UTC)
—Tenryuu 🐲 ( 💬 • 📝 ) 01:34, 9 June 2022 (UTC)It is not representative of all concerts for the duration shows.
What's a duration show?
- My bad, I meant to write duration of the shows.
- Done. I removed it as the previous sentence is enough. —Tenryuu 🐲 ( 💬 • 📝 ) 17:14, 10 June 2022 (UTC)
Velasquez commissioned Rajo Laurel [...]
Wikilink removed. Not a copyediting issue, but the subject doesn't appear at the page provided. —Tenryuu 🐲 ( 💬 • 📝 ) 19:49, 7 June 2022 (UTC)
Looking forward to your answers. —Tenryuu 🐲 ( 💬 • 📝 ) 19:49, 7 June 2022 (UTC)
- @Tenryuu: thanks for your detailed review and copyedits. I have addressed the above points listed. Let me know if there's something that needs clarification. Thank you! Pseud 14 (talk) 20:22, 7 June 2022 (UTC)
- @Pseud 14:: I've addressed most of the points, though I added a new question as I just noticed it. —Tenryuu 🐲 ( 💬 • 📝 ) 01:34, 9 June 2022 (UTC)
- @Tenryuu: thank you for the additional edits! The synopsis def reads so much better . I have provided my response to the additional question as well. Pseud 14 (talk) 02:30, 9 June 2022 (UTC)
- @Pseud 14: All right, I think that's everything! —Tenryuu 🐲 ( 💬 • 📝 ) 17:14, 10 June 2022 (UTC)
- @Tenryuu: always grateful for all your help and expertise. Very much appreciated. Thank you! Pseud 14 (talk) 17:30, 10 June 2022 (UTC)
GA Review
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Reviewing |
- This review is transcluded from Talk:R2K: The Concert/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 10:04, 25 June 2022 (UTC)
Good Article review progress box
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I will review this one tomorrow! --K. Peake 10:04, 25 June 2022 (UTC)
Infobox and lead
- Pipe Araneta Center to Araneta City in the infobox Done
- The alternate title is not sourced anywhere in the body -- removed
- Add a comma after tenth studio album Done
- The first para is only three sentences long; maybe add another notable sentence, like the one about Velasquez being nervous? -- I've added another sentence providing information on the producer/promoter and sponsors instead. Perhaps it is also notable to include it in the lead similar to other concert articles.
- "Buttefly" → "Butterfly" Done
- The inspiration sentence should be the second sentence of the second para instead Done
- The set list including songs from her previous albums is not directly mentioned in the body's prose Done -- I've added in the synopsis
- "as well as covers of pop hits" → "It also featured covers of pop hits" with the pipe Done
- "during the shows." → "during the concert." also, this should be next to the critical reception in the third para instead Done
- Pipe music critics to Music journalism Done
- The best shows in Asia accolade(s) is not sourced Done Removed. Forgot it was still in the lead, after I have removed it in the body from prior a copyedit
Background and development
- Img looks good, apart from the sold out part not being sourced anywhere in prose
- "The cover album contained remakes" → "The cover album contains remakes" with the pipe Done
- Wikilink music videos Done
- [1] is invoked too much per WP:OVERCITE; apart from the first sentence because that is non-consecutive, only cite after the fourth Done
- "a commercial success: it sold over" → "a commercial success, selling over" Done
- "in its second week of release and earned a" → "in the second week of release and earning a" also, add the organization that certified it Done -- added music certification organization
- "she performed in small venue tours[3] which" → "Velasquez performed in small venue tours,[3] which" Done
- Only invoke [6] after the second sentence Done
- Brian Mcknight → Brian McKnight with the wikilink Done
- Remove commas around Viva Concerts Done
- [9] should only be cited once in the sentence Done
- Pipe Folks Art Theater to Tanghalang Francisco Balagtas Done
- "big show coming up"." → "big show coming up."" per MOS:QUOTE, if this is a full sentence Done
- [10] should not be invoked after the first sentence of the second para; the others are fine per them being quotes and one the last sentence Done
- Video looks good!
- [15] should only be invoked once in the Paul Abdul sentence Done
- Pipe Rajo Laurel to Laurel family (Philippines) Done
- [18] should only be invoked once in the two consecutive sentences solely citing this ref Done
Concert synopsis
- Apart from the sentence where two refs are used, [12] should only be invoked once after a group of consecutive sentences Done
- ""Larger than Life" before" → ""Larger than Life", before" Done
- "of "One Love" then went directly" → "of "One Love", transitioning directly" with the pipe per MOS:LINK2SECT and shouldn't you mention who all the songs covered are by? Done I have attributed/mentioned the artists where possible, except for when it's a medley/mash-up, to avoid WP:SEAOFBLUE
- Img looks good!
- "falling out of love before" → "falling out of love, before" Done
- ""For the Love of You" where Velasquez" → "For the Love of You", where Velasquez"
- [12][19] duo should only be invoked once for the first two sentences Done
- The third sentence should cite [19] after the comma, followed by [12] after the full-stop Done
- "of "Sana Maulit Mulit" before continuing" → "of "Sana Maulit Mulit", before continuing" Done
- Remove wikilink on pyrotechnics Done
- After [20], [12] should only be invoked at the end of the closing sentence Done
Reception and recordings
- Wikilink pyrotechnics on the quote box, also do not use double quotation marks inside other ones -- the term referred by Lo in the quote actually describes "vocal pyrotechnics" (an alternative to vocal abilities, etc). So I did not link. Also removed double quotation marks
- "The concerts received positive responses from critics who" → "The concert was met with positive responses from critics, who" Done
- The second sentence of Ricky Lo's review should be put into your own words more, especially when there is a quote box from him Done reworded this to avoid quoting the paragraph in the article
- "began his review with" should have a comma after it if the sentence from the original source begins at this point Done
- "pop artist has"." → "pop artist has."" per MOS:QUOTE Done
- Remove wikilink on Celine Dion Done
- "called it "the most" → "noted "the most" Done
- "her costumes as "grand and lavish" while" → "Velasquez's costumes as "grand and lavish", while" Done
- Mention the writer instead of attributing the comments to the Manila Standard, also the speech marks are not ended Done
- Same as above for attribution of the Philippine Daily Inquirer comments Done
- "It previewed multiple snippets of" → "The film featured previews of multiple snippets of" Done
- [23] should only be invoked after the second of the two sentences per WP:OVERCITE Done
Set list
- Good
Personnel
- Use
{{spaced ndash}}
so there is the right space between personnel and roles Done
See also
- Good
References
- Copyvio score looks slightly high at 45.2%; cut down direct quoting from Ricky Lo in reception Done cut down on direct quoting per reception comments above
- For any citations that are through Google Books, add the via parameter only wikilinking on the first instance Done
- WP:OVERLINK of Philippine Daily Inquirer on refs 4, 7, 8, 10, 11, 17 and 19 Done
- WP:OVERLINK of Viva Concerts on ref 9 Done
- WP:OVERLINK of The Philippine Star on refs 14, 18 and 22 Done
- Use two separate parameters for the authors and cite last name followed by first on ref 20 Done
- WP:OVERLINK of Vivamax on ref 23 Done
External links
- Good
Final comments and verdict
- On hold until all of the issues are fixed; nice work on this! --K. Peake 09:04, 26 June 2022 (UTC)
- Thank you for your thorough review @Kyle Peake: I have addressed the above points and provided a few comments in blue to support changes made. Let me know if I may have missed anything or if there are items that remain unaddressed. Thanks Pseud 14 (talk) 14:03, 26 June 2022 (UTC)
- ✓ Pass now, good work from you even though I made a couple of copyedits! --K. Peake 16:27, 27 June 2022 (UTC)
- Thank you Kyle Peake! Much appreciate your review and the improvements/edits you've made. Cheers! Pseud 14 (talk) 17:16, 27 June 2022 (UTC)
Inappropriate images
Can someone please remove the pictures of literal sh*t posted by a guy called "scatman". And also ban the user? This is today's featured article so millions of people are seeing this????? 78.18.215.167 (talk) 13:12, 8 April 2023 (UTC)