Talk:Rise of Mana/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: IDV (talk · contribs) 14:46, 11 February 2016 (UTC)

I'll do this one.--IDV^talk 14:46, 11 February 2016 (UTC)

Review

• Japanese artists Taiki and Ryudai Murayama [...] Japanese singer-songwriter Kokia You introduce a lot of people, but only these three's nationalities are mentioned. Is it particularly noteworthy that these are from Japan?
• mixed to positive opinions This phrasing has never made sense to me - mixed means that there were both negative and positive opinions, right?
• During gameplay and battle, Is there a difference between "gameplay" and "battle"?
• navigation and actions occur in real-time within to-scale battlefields AFAIK real-time is an adjective while real time is a noun. Also, what does "to-scale" mean here?
• After its initial release, It almost looks like "it" refers to the Final Fantasy series. Maybe change it to Rise of Mana's.
• Oyamada also initially tried to bring Takehiro Ando on board, Who is Ando?
• It was constructed using the Unity game engine. The game was constructed, not the development.
• some NPCs were designed by Japanese artist Taiki, Same as above, what is it about these few people that warrant a mention of their nationality?
• within a two month period Again, two-month would be the adjective.
• rather than appearing as "ghosts". What does this mean?
• Some tracks, such as "The Drip Drip Drip of Memory", being fairly weak and forgettable. This sentence doesn't seem to be complete. Additionally, it lacks a space after the period.
• a 2.5-star rating Out of 5? 10?
• Overall, Green felt that, while it had good production value and was substantially better than other mobile game soundtracks, but lacked the emotional impact Is the comma after "that" needed? Also, "but" should probably be "it".
• , originally scheduled for that winter. Try to avoid using seasons to indicate when something happened - while it's winter right now where I live, it's summer in the southern hemisphere. "The end of the year" or something similar should work.
• the company is looking into alternative ways of distributing the title. This seems quite important. Maybe it should be mentioned in the lead?
• Within the first few days of operation, Rise of Mana had 500,000 active players.[32] Within a month of its release, the iOS version had one million registered players. A month after the initial release, the Android and Vita versions had not been released yet, so do we really need to specify that it was the iOS version that had the one million players?
• Japanese reviews of the title have been mixed to positive. Same as above.
• Is the AppGet writer's family name Takano or Tanako? It's rendered as one in the prose and as the other in the ref.
• saying his last experience of this kind was when playing The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time Might be good to mention when Ocarina of Time came out.
• and hoped that Square Enix would both handled it wisely Something went wrong in this sentence.
• I guess this is not a requirement for GA, but I want to note that you use the word "echoed" a lot in the last paragraph.

Other than this, it's looking good. Placing this on hold for now. --IDV^talk 15:41, 11 February 2016 (UTC)

@IDV: I've addressed all the points above. And about Tanako's name: I used the English version of his name (Japanese names have surnames and first names in reverse order from a western perspective). --ProtoDrake (talk) 16:00, 11 February 2016 (UTC)

Thank you for the fixes. About the name: yes, I know - I was referring to how you spelled the name differently in the prose and in the {{cite web}} template, but never mind, I fixed it myself. I now believe this satisfies the GA criteria. Congratulations! --IDV^talk 17:52, 11 February 2016 (UTC)