Talk:Sergio Pellissier/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: QatarStarsLeague (talk · contribs) 04:16, 6 January 2015 (UTC)

I will take this one. My first review of the new year! QatarStarsLeague (talk) 04:16, 6 January 2015 (UTC)
1a. I altered some things for the better, but here are some further changes you can make:
He remained at the club after Chievo were relegated to Serie B in 2007 and became the squad's captain. The same year he became captain?
Pellissier has achieved historical records for the club and became an idol for Chievo. This statement is unclear and unverified.
Pellissier was born in Aosta; he moved to Turin where he trained at the Torino F.C. youth academy. He alone or his family along with him?
He also appeared in a Coppa Italia match[4] before leaving the Torino squad. Reference at end of sentence. Also, under what circumstances did he depart?
Hyperlink SPAL in the Early career section
On 9 November 2014, Pellissier came as 46th substitute and scored two goals on a 2–1 victory against Cesena after more than a year of his last goal. 46th minute I imagine?
He said, "It's a dream that came true. L'azzurra is the cherry on the cake of an extraordinary season. But the merit is not mine, but all of Chievo." I think this quote is not entirely contextual.
1b. Seems compliant here.
2a. Yes, it does.
2b. Complies
2c. Pellissier has achieved historical records for the club and became an idol for Chievo. This I believe is original research.
3a. An ample proportion of GA Association football biographical articles contain personal life sections. Can one not be added here? Another section I have seen elsewhere but not here is an Honours section.
3b. It is concentrated nicely, but again I am concerned that is is entirely concentrated on his professional career.
4. Article is not biased.
5. No such thing is happening.
6a. Very good here.
6b. Is there another image that can be added in the later section(s) of the article? If so, I think the article merits another.

Just a few things to alter, very nice work on this article. QatarStarsLeague (talk) 02:20, 12 January 2015 (UTC)

Thank you very much for the review!

My replies:

• Rewrote to "He remained at the club after Chievo were relegated to Serie B in the 2006–07 season and became the squad's captain in the following one".
• Along the text there's some samples like winning the "Cangrande del Bentegodi" four times, setting a record for goals in a single season, 100 goals and over 400 appearances. It is not that necessary, though, and I can remove it if you feel that is innapropriate.
• As a kid, I'd assume his family went with him. However, I can't assume what it's not in the source. I could find too much on his early life...
• No reference should not be at the end of the sentence since it doesn't source it but only his appearance in that match. I could find too much on his early career... so I can't tell you.
• I've only linked his clubs in the lea per WP:OVERLINK: "Generally, a link should appear only once in an article, but if helpful for readers, links may be repeated in infoboxes, tables, image captions, footnotes, hatnotes, and at the first occurrence after the lead." However, if you think it's useful I can add. But should I link only SPAL, or Torino, Varese and Chievo too?
• Yep. Added "minute".
• Added "About reaching the national squad"
• About an Honours section I just don't think he won too much thins. Do you think it's necessary to add something like this
• About personal life, well, sources are somewhat scarce on it... But I'll see what I can do.

-- Gabriel Yuji (talk) 05:16, 12 January 2015 (UTC)

About images, there's no other image available. Gabriel Yuji (talk) 19:40, 12 January 2015 (UTC)

Hi, QatarStarsLeague, I could find a little (really, little) on his personal life and I've added it. I could add a bit on his early career too but as I said before it's kind of difficult to find more. He's an important player to Chievo, but has not received too much mainstream media coverage... Gabriel Yuji (talk) 02:48, 13 January 2015 (UTC) Yes, very good. I now see that such an honours section would be perfunctory, and thusly unnecessary. That covers it all then. Nice work! QatarStarsLeague (talk) 04:26, 13 January 2015 (UTC)