Talk:Sydney Gardens/GA1
Latest comment: 7 years ago by The Rambling Man in topic GA Review
GA Review
editGA toolbox |
---|
Reviewing |
Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch
Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 09:45, 16 August 2017 (UTC)
- "Bath Vauxhall Gardens" could be created as a redirect to this article, plus I'd expect to see alternate names in bold as well in the lead.
- Please forgive my ignorance, but by "pleasure gardens (or Vauxhall) in the country" are you saying that Vauxhall means pleasure gardens? I don't seem to be able to find anything with a quick Google about that.
- It seems to be that after the Vauxhall Gardens in London, those "pleasure grounds" elsewhere were given the title (see for example this piece in the Guardian and this from Parks and Gardens UK which calls it "Sydney Gardens Vauxhall"). For the use of the term in the UK and elsewhere see "Vauxhall" Pleasure Gardens which mentions Manchester, Denmark and USA.— Rod talk 20:35, 16 August 2017 (UTC)
- Rodw I think this is the only sticking point for me, can we somehow explain this usage with sources in the text? The Rambling Man (talk) 11:58, 17 August 2017 (UTC)
- I've added a couple of sentences at the start of the history section to try to explain this.— Rod talk 13:22, 17 August 2017 (UTC)
- "Bath & North East Somerset Council" doesn't seem to use an ampersand.
- Both are used locally but I've changed it.— Rod talk 20:35, 16 August 2017 (UTC)
- "Kennet and Avon Canal " likewise.
- Likewise— Rod talk 20:35, 16 August 2017 (UTC)
- "In 1908 the .." and "Since 2015 work..." I would prefer to see commas after the years here.
- I'm often accused of abusing commas. Done— Rod talk 20:47, 16 August 2017 (UTC)
- "in the 1790s opening in 1795 as" I'd definitely expect a comma after 1970s.
- "It was funded by selling £100 shares.[6] " any idea how many?
- Forsyth p184 doesn't give a number.— Rod talk 11:13, 17 August 2017 (UTC)
- "a maze or labyrinth" one or the other.
- Both Forsyth & Downing say labyrinth so I have gone with that.— Rod talk 11:13, 17 August 2017 (UTC)
- "A plan of Sydney Gardens, Bath as part of the plan" comma after Bath. Wow, am I comma-obsessed? I think you get my feeling on this by now so I won't mention it again, but all instances could be fixed if you agree.
- I'm happy to agree and by guided by you, but when I'm reading it I don't notice these.— Rod talk 20:47, 16 August 2017 (UTC)
- "semi-circular Orchestra with a wide covered loggia " you link "maze" but not "Orchestra" (which is curiously capitalised) or "loggia"... Suggest it be t'other way round.
- I've changed cpaitalisation & wikilinked "loggia", wp doesn't seem to have an article on orchestra as an architectural feature - but the terms is used by Historic England in their record.— Rod talk 11:13, 17 August 2017 (UTC)
- "In 1836 the Hotel was" not its formal name so no need to capitalise it.
- "when the Empire Hotel was built instead" where was that built, not in Sydney Gardens by the look of it, worth noting.
- Its about a quarter of a mile away on the opposite side of the Avon so I have added a note to that effect.— Rod talk 11:34, 17 August 2017 (UTC)
- "a grant, of £332,000, from " now, I see no need for commas to separate the grant amount here!
- Ahhhh commas. Done.— Rod talk 20:47, 16 August 2017 (UTC)
- "The grant will be used to.." it looks like it was awarded January this year, is "will be used" still right?
- I've not seen anything in local press or from the council to say work has been done so yes. (Likely to be completed in winter months when less tourists around).— Rod talk 11:34, 17 August 2017 (UTC)
- " for a larger grant" about ten times the size so worth noting.
- Added.— Rod talk 11:34, 17 August 2017 (UTC)
- "Sketch of the Fancy Fair at Sydney Gardens, Bath for " comma after Bath.
- Ahhhh commas. Done.— Rod talk 20:47, 16 August 2017 (UTC)
- Also, needs a full stop after "Painted around 1836 by an unknown artist"
- "The 12 metres (39 ft) high" use "adj=on" in the convert template to avoid the odd "metres ...high".
- "a gardeners cottage" would that be "a gardener's cottage" or "a gardeners' cottage"?
- Now you are having a go at apostrophes - I've revised (based on my wife's advice)— Rod talk 20:47, 16 August 2017 (UTC)
- "bargees below" barges?
- No Bargees were the men who worked on the boats & had to pay a toll.— Rod talk 20:47, 16 August 2017 (UTC)
- Last two "paragraphs" are too short, and listed building is linked on its second use in that section.
- Changed & two sentences merged
Interesting article, well written, a handful of trivial points raised above, so it's on hold so we can go through them. Cheers. The Rambling Man (talk) 10:11, 16 August 2017 (UTC)
- Thanks for your comments, I have tried to respond but will admit I have been accused of comma and apostrophe abuse in the past , so if you see any more please change or point them out.— Rod talk 11:34, 17 August 2017 (UTC)
- All good, thanks for addressing my pickiness, promoted. The Rambling Man (talk) 14:06, 17 August 2017 (UTC)