Talk:The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom/GA2

GA Review

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Reviewer: TrademarkedTWOrantula (talk · contribs) 03:05, 3 March 2024 (UTC)

Link is sooooooooooooooooo hot!!^[hyperbole] <3 <3 <3 TWOrantula^TM (enter the web) 03:05, 3 March 2024 (UTC)

Also, I have time to review this article now. Yay me! TWOrantula^TM (enter the web) 03:05, 3 March 2024 (UTC)

I'm gonna pass this GA review over to @Vrxces. I have to go somewhere, and unfortunately I have to sleep early. TWOrantula^TM (enter the web) 03:11, 1 April 2024 (UTC)

Apologies @Dcdiehardfan: and @The Night Watch: I was not aware this was handed to me, although I note the nominator reached out, did ask and I replied, perhaps too ambiguously. I do not have the capacity to complete a GAN of an article of this complexity and re-read and re-evaluate the sourcing. However, I don't want to hold it up further. If you are comfortable with the proposed approach that I complete the review on the basis that TTWO has performed a review, and provided significant comments, I'm happy to pass provided the comments have largely been actioned and addressed. On a very cursory look I would say the only additional conspicuous fix is that the review template could be condensed to ten items as is the norm, particularly omitting those reviews that are not mentioned in the article. Let me know if this is a fair direction to close the GAN in a timely manner. ＶＲＸＣＥＳ (talk) 08:08, 5 April 2024 (UTC)

Thanks @Vrxces. I think TTWO has provided a good amount of comments and I think it would be fair to close the review since most of them have been actioned. I have made the changes to the review template that you requested. If you notice anything else you can post about it here, though I'm taking a self-mandated break from enwiki, and I probably won't be readily around to address anything else. Dcdiehardfan might be able to action any further comments you have if he is not busy. The Night Watch (talk) 19:33, 5 April 2024 (UTC)

No worries, given this I'm happy to pass. Thanks to @TrademarkedTWOrantula: for undertaking the original review. ＶＲＸＣＥＳ (talk) 21:00, 5 April 2024 (UTC)

Rate	Attribute	Review Comment
1. Well-written:
	1a. the prose is clear, concise, and understandable to an appropriately broad audience; spelling and grammar are correct.
	1b. it complies with the Manual of Style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation.	Lead section adequately summarizes article. Fiction is out-of-universe. List incorporation policy does not apply.
2. Verifiable with no original research:
	2a. it contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline.	No bare URLs spotted. Reference section easy to spot.
	2b. reliable sources are cited inline. All content that could reasonably be challenged, except for plot summaries and that which summarizes cited content elsewhere in the article, must be cited no later than the end of the paragraph (or line if the content is not in prose).	The article uses some sources considered to be situational per WP:VG/S. However, they are rarely ever used. There are way more reliable sources than situational sources.
	2c. it contains no original research.
	2d. it contains no copyright violations or plagiarism.	According to the Earwig report, the top result is a Discord page. Most of the pages, if not all, are reported as a false positive; game names are highlighted in red.
3. Broad in its coverage:
	3a. it addresses the main aspects of the topic.	The gameplay, plot, development, and reception are covered - material that is adequate for a video game article.
	3b. it stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail (see summary style).	Article stays focused.
	4. Neutral: it represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each.
	5. Stable: it does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute.	No recent edit wars. Development is at a steady pace.
6. Illustrated, if possible, by media such as images, video, or audio:
	6a. media are tagged with their copyright statuses, and valid non-free use rationales are provided for non-free content.	Cover art and gameplay(?) screenshot have a valid non-free use rationale. Image of Aonuma is correctly licensed.
	6b. media are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions.	The gameplay screenshot gives a clear visual on what a crucial part of the gameplay looks like. Obviously, the cover art is relevant for a video game article, but I have mixed feeling about using the Aonuma image in the development section.
	7. Overall assessment.

Quickfail?

• Y This Earwig report isn't concerning (see comments above).
• Y Stable.
• Y No outstanding issues in previous GA review (because I had no time to come back to it).
• Y No cleanup tags or lots of citation needed tags.
• Y Skimmed over the article: nearly all sources are reliable, and no unreliable sources were used at all! Article is most certainly broad and neutral.

Lead

• ...and features a sky...

Done

• access to various devices

Done

• Remove comma between "exploration" and "and"

Done

• "Runes"? - It's been a while since I've played BotW (and I have legit no clue what to do after I get off the plateau)

Took that part out of the lead, the gameplay section goes into better detail I think. I also reworded the "Rune" part to be more in line with how the BOTW article refers to the powers as those of the Sheikah Slate, not as runes.

• Remove comma between "experimentation" and "and"

Done

• Why'd they struggle? Or how?

The source says that they struggled but didn't really go into detail on how, just that they struggled at differentiating the two games while they were developing TOTK.

• "for release" "to release"

Done

• Remove comma between "2022" and "but"

Done

• could further refine it

Done

• Tears of the Kingdom received acclaim, with reviewers considering it to be of similar quality to Breath of the Wild and some calling it a superior game. -> "'Tears of the Kingdom was acclaimed to be of similar or superior quality to Breath of the Wild."

Done

TrademarkedTWOrantula, replied to your comments. The Night Watch (talk) 00:15, 5 March 2024 (UTC)

@The Night Watch: I have added new comments for gameplay and development. TWOrantula^TM (enter the web) 00:06, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

@The Night Watch I helped you out on some of the stuff below as marked. Feel free to let me know if there are any issues and good luck on getting the article to GA! -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

Thanks for helping ^_^ TWOrantula^TM (enter the web) 03:58, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

I'm glad to! There was some stuff that I feel I couldn't address but it should be easy for the OP to do so I think. This is actually a game I really like, so I'm honored to have contributed to the GAR. Dcdiehardfan (talk) 04:32, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

Gameplay

• Shouldn't it be "the player" instead of "players"?

 Done -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• Semicolon at "areas" should be a colon

 Done -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• The game retains many of the characters and locales from Breath of the Wild - Kind of repeating the same sentence of the first paragraph. Change to "Characters and locales from its predecessor were kept and modified to fit the new storyline."

 Done -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• I don't get why mentioning that Link can ride horses is important.

It was mentioned in the previous game as a core aspect of gameplay, so I decided to mention it again to reiterate how it is similar to its predecessor.

• I was confused about the word "environ" - maybe try something like "climate"?

Changed to "Region"

• Usually when I hear the word "boss" I expect something powerful (cut "powerful" in "powerful boss enemies")

 Removed -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• Remove comma between "illuminate" and "and"

 Done -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• Treasure is valuable... isn't it?

 Removed -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• until the player removes this effect by returning to the surface of Hyrule - Returning to the surface implies the cure (change sentence to "Inside the Depth is a harmful substance called gloom, which reduce Link's maximum hearts until the player returns to the surface of Hyrule.").
• for various purposes such as combat and exploration, or for solving puzzles -> "for combat, exploration, or solving puzzles"

 Done -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• "and include" -> "including"

 Done -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• Might want to mention what the Sheikah Slate did in the previous game

Any particular way how I could word this?

• to a shield or a weapon to change its attributes

 Removed -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• • Just read the next sentence. I'm not sure how to reword this; my brain at this point of the night just schlumps...
• Why is the word rewind quoted?

 Comment: Not OP, but I assume it's a scare quote. -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

Removed

• by causing a falling rock to move skywards -> "recoiling a falling rock"

Replaced -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• Is there a limit to what solid surfaces the player could pass through using the Ascend power?

There are some surfaces that are impossible to pass through.

• Remove comma between "Hyrule" and "and"

 Removed -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• "these items" -> "them"

 Done -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• I think you could cut "In addition these other features"

 Removed -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• Optional: add alt text for cover art and gameplay screenshot

Development

• When was development of BoTW completed?

Not specified in the cited articles but I assume in either 2018 or 2017.

• Also, is "BoTW" an acceptable acronym?

In the article it probably wouldn't be appropriate, but yes it is a common acronym for the game.

• Recommend changing "involvement" to another word

 Comment: I just reworded a bit of the prose all around -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• "has held" -> "had held"?

 Done -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• "the end of the 2000s" -> "the late 2000s"

 Done -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• Not sure why there's a "Game name (year of release)" thing

 Comment: I've seen it as a convention across Wiki articles for media projects in general, and I practice it too. I removed it to remain consistency. -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• said that he was inspired by Wii Sports Resort (2009) to use the same world but add new mechanics. -> ...said that he took Wii Sports Resort and added new mechanics. - IDK but this sentence sounds really unclear to me

 Partly done I changed the syntax to more closely align with the suggestion, but omitted the "same world" part as I'm not sure what that meant -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• "diving from the sky" -> "skydiving"?

 Done -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• Aonuma cited inspiration from the open-world games... - Also, I think a wikilink would be sufficient here. Not sure which one, though.

 Done Wikilinked open world since that had an article -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• surface; Instead, - Hold up. Wait a minute...

 Comment: I'm confused what the comment is alluding to, I altered the syntax a bit, is it good? -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

Should've been more clearer. There's a semicolon and the letter is capitalized. TWOrantula^TM (enter the web) 03:56, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

Ahh, I believe it should be fixed by now. -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:44, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• The team extended the exploration areas into the sky and underground. -> The team expanded the world to include the sky and underground.

Replaced -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• due to the limitations of the hardware for that game, the developers were not able to achieve a seamless descent from the sky to the surface -> ...commenting that its hardware limitations hindered a seamless descent from the sky to the surface.

Replaced -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• With the capabilities of the Switch - Nintendo Switch could be linked again

 Done -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• could now provide the freedom of -> "gained the ability to"?

Replaced -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 02:25, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

Reworded again. TWOrantula^TM (enter the web) 04:04, 6 March 2024 (UTC)

• Aonuma said that the development team was trying to create something new but also something similar to the previous game and realised that some aspects "were already as they should be". -> "Aonuma said that the development team was trying to create something new while retaining the (another word for "concept" or "vibe" here) but realized that some aspects were "already as they should be".

Y -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• Fujibayashi also said

Y -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• there were occasions where they struggled to differentiate between the two games -> "they would occasionally struggle to differentiate between the games"

Y

• I'd suggest using a better word for "large"

Replaced Used "vast", would that work? -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

It works. TWOrantula^TM (enter the web) 21:40, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• Lot of MOS:SAID now that I'm reading it

 Fixed I went ahead and revised the prose to cut down the amount of "said" -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• to make them unique to their respective environments "just like traditional The Legend of Zelda games" - Readers (like my dad or sister) might not understand Zelda games as well as I do.

Reworded some. Does this work?

• The dungeons were primarily created to showcase the range of Link's powers and gadgets as a way to maximize the gameplay. -> "The dungeons were primarily created to maximize the gameplay by showcasing the range of Link's powers and gadgets."

Y -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• to be accessed seamlessly rather than being closed off - Three things here. One: first part ("to be accessed seemlessly") sounds kind of awkward. Two: Closed off how? Three: What's being accessed?
• "dive from the sky straight down into the dungeon" -> "descend from the sky into the dungeon"

Y -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• and step out again at any point -> "and conveniently enter and exit"?

Y -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• This gave the development team the confidence - Kind of sounds promotional

 Comment: Reworded that entire content to make it more objective -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• to create their own unique gameplay experience - Word "create" is repeated

 Comment: Ditto -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• What are Zonai devices again?

They are mentioned in gameplay, they are the things that can be used to make vehicles.

• greater experimentation -> "creativity"? "imagination"?

 Comment: Changed the overall diction -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• this also required

Y -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• I'd recommend dropping "to be set"

Y -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• allowing the player to be creative and maintaining limitations to ensure players were not able to break gameplay. -> "the player's creativity and limits to prevent the player from breaking (or cheating?) the game."

Y I used the word exploit -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• Why is hands quoted?

 Comment: Another scare quote, I think -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

Removed

• Dohta was already introduced in the second paragraph. The third paragraph uses his full name and reintroduces him as the technical director.

 Fixed -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• Not sure why "joining hands" is in quotes

 Comment: Probably another scare quote, not sure if it has an actual meaning in-game -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

Removed again

• "aspect" could be replaced in "is a major aspect"

Replaced I used element -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• to use his hands to create items -> "to create items by using his hands"

 Partly done Eliminating "by" for brevity -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• but it is

Y -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• but is also used symbolically to solve puzzles and open doors - ???

Not really clear, so removing

• "is also present within" -> "is in"

Y -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• agreed that

Y -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• "cheat" -> "quick way"

Y -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• Its implementation posed other challenges, such as ensuring that the player would not ascend into an empty space due to data loading problems. -> Its implementation posed other challenges, such as ensuring that a player would not land on an empty space due to loading issues.

Y -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• story elements, and a 2022 release window

Y -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• was essentially complete

Y And "completed" -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• Any information on sales? I'd recommend moving the sales section below the release paragraph.

 Comment: By release para, are you referring to the last para in Development? If so, I personally like where Sales is at, as that information does tend to be in the Reception section of articles. On this tangent, I also did some edits to better section the Reception section. -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 21:37, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

Plot

Note: It has been a while since I've played any Zelda games (or video games in general D:). Expect me to get nothing.

• Tears of the Kingdom takes place a number of years after...

 Removed -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:43, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• "from which gloom" sounds kind of awkward

 Fixed Changed the syntax so it's "a poisonous substance called gloom"

• "is raised upwards"

 Removed -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:43, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• Link is rescued by a disembodied arm, which had been restraining the mummy, - What arm? Was it just lying there?
• and on the Great Sky Island - He teleported???
• "the mummy" could be replaced with "it"

Replaced -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:43, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• "Zonai"?
• Could replace "meets" with "finds" in "He meets the spirit of Rauru"

Replaced -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:43, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• "wrought chaos upon" -> "wrecked havoc on" - IDK it just feels right

 Done I definitely agree, love that phrase haha -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:43, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• Remove comma between "Hyrule" and "and"

 Removed -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:43, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• and sets out to investigate

 Removed -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:43, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• and the president of YunoboCo, a mining company - Why's that important?
• a young Rito archer and the son of Teba - Same thing here
• "Gerudo, and alongside them..." -> "Gerudo. Alongside them..." (split sentence)

 Done -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:43, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• "ventures into" -> "explores"

 Done Good word choice imo -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:43, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• With the defeat of the monsters occupying the temples -> "After defeating occupying monsters..."

 Done -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:43, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• The spirits of sages from ancient times -> "Ancient spirits of sages..."

 Done -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:43, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• passing down the artifacts, secret stones, which they once wielded. - What

 Comment: I believed it's implying the sages once owned secret stones as a power artifacts in the past, and they are now giving it to Link. Leaving unchanged as I'm unsure and deferring it to OP. -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:43, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• Afterwards, after -> "After..." - After after after after aft-

 Fixed Tautologies, amirite haha -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:43, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• Dragon's Tears - Dragon what now?

Clarified that they are items

• transported through time to the distant past -> "sent backwards in time"

 Done I think the diction is a bit awkward but is acceptable for now, I also wikilinked to time travel in fiction.

• There, she meets Rauru, revealed to be Hyrule's first king, and Sonia, Hyrule's first queen. - He's... in the past now? Did he time travel or something?

 Comment: I believe that's what's implied in the prose, that Zelda time travelled into the past and met Rauru and Sonia,. not sure who's "he" referring to. I'll clean up the prose a bit here to further clarify these events occured in Zelda's timeframe. -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:43, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• In the past, Ganondorf kills Sonia, - Is Link flashbacking, or is he in the past? If it's the first one, change to past tense.

 Comment: Was Link who you were alluding to above? I'll leave my edits there but defer it to the OP to finish. -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:43, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

Yep. I thought it was Link. TWOrantula^TM (enter the web) 03:54, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• Sidon, Tulin, Yunobo, Riju, and Mineru, -> "his clan"

Replaced -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:43, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• and regains his original right arm - Wait, so this entire time, he fought with one hand only, and he's left handed? Awesome...
• "fade away" -> "vanish"

 Done -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:43, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

• "fall to the surface below, where they reunite" -> "fall and reunite at the surface below"

 Done A bit of altering diction for less "and". -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:43, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

I'll address these comments shortly. Been busy recently so it may take me some time to respond. The Night Watch (talk) 01:10, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

@The Night Watch I've went ahead and already addressed most of the simple prose stuff above, marked as above. Anything that is marked  Comment: or blank is what I deferred to you, as I'm not as familiar with the plot and trust you to clarify those things. I think the big issues is with the clarity regarding the time travel part and other plot elements. -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 03:43, 9 March 2024 (UTC)

Thanks again @Dcdiehardfan, I'll look at the comments again sometime tomorrow. The Night Watch (talk) 04:26, 12 March 2024 (UTC)

Reception

• The first paragraph should only contain aggregate scores.

 Comment: I tried to rearrange some stuff, OP should definitely take a look and revise as needed. -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 20:22, 12 March 2024 (UTC)

• "through its story and mechanics" -> "for its story and mechanics"

Y -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 20:22, 12 March 2024 (UTC)

• cut "to make a fresh experience"

Y -Dcdiehardfan (talk) 20:22, 12 March 2024 (UTC)

TrademarkedTWOrantula I believe that Dcdiehardfan and I have addressed your comments. Sorry for the long delay. The Night Watch (talk) 01:33, 21 March 2024 (UTC)

TrademarkedTWOrantula just a nudge :) The Night Watch (talk) 13:50, 26 March 2024 (UTC)

Sorry about that. I'll try to finish this review as soon as possible (I'll be going somewhere). @Dcdiehardfan: Hope you're ready for my barrage of comments. TWOrantula^TM (enter the web) 01:00, 29 March 2024 (UTC)

To save some time, I'm going to copyedit the rest of the article, do some spotchecking, and then I'll promote the article. TWOrantula^TM (enter the web) 18:43, 31 March 2024 (UTC)

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.