Talk:The Life and Death of 9413: a Hollywood Extra/GA1
GA Review
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Reviewer: MPJ-DK (talk · contribs) 04:27, 4 March 2016 (UTC)
I am about to start the review, full disclosure I am aWiki Cup and a GA Cup participant. If anyone would like to reciprocate I have my own GAN (Mexican National Trios Championship) needing a review and a Feature Article (CMLL World Heavyweight Championship) and Feature List (Mexican National Light Heavyweight Championship) candidates in need of input. Not that it's a factor in my GA review. I usually provide my feedback in portions over a day or so, so don't be surprised if I keep popping in with stuff for a while. MPJ-US 04:27, 4 March 2016 (UTC)
GA Toolbox
editThe GA tools provided usually provide a good place to start, so let's hit all those first.
- Peer Review
- Per Wikipedia:Manual of Style (numbers), there should be a non-breaking space - between a number and the unit of measurement. For example, instead of 35 mm, use 35 mm, which when you are editing the page, should look like: 35 mm.
- It is indicating that there may be weasel words in the article, as I review the article I will take a closer look at these.
- Copyright violations tool
- Reports as "Unlikely"
- Disambiguation Links
no problems
- External links
no problems
We're off to a promising start.
Sources
editAll look good, reliable and correctly formatted. I do have a question since I am not familiar with the movie article standards, is it normal and acceptable to not source the plot section ? MPJ-US 16:02, 4 March 2016 (UTC)
- Thanks for doing the review! Yes, per WP:FILMPLOT: "Since films are primary sources in their articles, basic descriptions of their plots are acceptable without reference to an outside source." — Hunter Kahn 02:31, 5 March 2016 (UTC)
- I thought that might be the case, thank you for confirming. I will be continuing the review now then.
Images
editAppears to all have the appropriate licenses and are all free due to age and copyright rules.
General Review
edit- "Finally he dies" - comma after "finally" I believe
- Done.
- Is camerawork one word?
- I believe it is, actually.
- "at failing to achieve theirs dreams" = "their dreams"
- Oops. LOL Fixed.
- "shot in 35 mm film" - not sure if this is a common way to phrase it but I would have thought it would be "on 35 mm film"?
- I think you're right. Changed.
- "45 sets were build in" - use the word "built"
- Oops again. LOL Changed.
- "into squares, while Vorkapić" - does not need the comma
- I've removed the comma.
- "dehuminazation" should be "dehumanization"
- Fixed it.
- "Specators" should be "Spectators"
- Changed it.
- "the expressionistic manner" = "an expressionistic manner"?
- Although your version is grammatically correct, the actual quote uses 'the expressionistic manner' so I think we have to stick with that.
- If the quote uses it then it's not a problem. MPJ-US 11:50, 8 March 2016 (UTC)
- Although your version is grammatically correct, the actual quote uses 'the expressionistic manner' so I think we have to stick with that.
- "eight musicians, and was" does not need the comma
- Removed it.
- That's all I got, which is the least amount of issues I've found during a GA review so far. Great job it's 99% there already. I am going to put this on hold for 7 days so you have time to fix it. MPJ-US 11:03, 5 March 2016 (UTC)
- Thanks very much for the review! — Hunter Kahn 03:02, 8 March 2016 (UTC)
- Looks like everything I pointed out has been improved upon, I will do one more read through to ensure nothing else needs to be addressed. Great work so far. MPJ-US 11:50, 8 March 2016 (UTC)
- Thanks very much for the review! — Hunter Kahn 03:02, 8 March 2016 (UTC)
@Hunter Kahn: - After another read through I am satisfied that this meets the GA criteria. passed really good work, congratuations. MPJ-US 12:19, 8 March 2016 (UTC)