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Talk:This is Not My Hat/GA1

< Talk:This is Not My Hat
Latest comment: 5 years ago by Barkeep49 in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Latest comment: 5 years ago10 comments3 people in discussion
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Reviewer: Ceranthor (talk · contribs) 18:52, 24 March 2019 (UTC)Reply


I will review this. I am participating in the WikiCup. ceranthor 18:52, 24 March 2019 (UTC)Reply

Prose

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Lead
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  • "The story is told through the unreliable narration of a little fish, who has stolen a hat from a big fish and what happens when the big fish wakes up." - Grammatically, this sentence doesn't work as is. I'd reword; the issue is that "and what happens when the big fish wakes up." doesn't fit what precedes it.
revised.Best, Barkeep49 (talk)
  • "until Klassen took a suggestion to change what animals were in the story. " - "which", not "what"
  Done
  • " In addition to several starred reviews" - What does this mean? That they received "several stars" or that they were well-received? Either way, I don't think it works; just say "in addition to positive reviews"
Changing it to positive in the lead makes sense so   Done. Best, Barkeep49 (talk)
  • "he book won the 2013 Caldecott Medal and the 2014 Kate Greenaway Medal becoming the first book to win both awards. The book was also a commercial success." - lots of repetition of "book" in close proximity
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Background and publication
  • "Klassen then switched to fish.[2]" - but you never clarify what he's switching from - a bear and a rabbit, it looks like? You should mention that. Might also want to mention the specific animals used in the original in the lead as well, but that's not as important as it is here.
Well according to Klassen the rabbit gets eaten at the end of the first book so presumably he'd not have been in any sequel. I tweaked the sentence to read "from mammals to fish" but I don't know that the sourcing tells us more specifically what character Klassen was originally experimenting with and so I don't think it would be correct to be more specific and even this feels like a bit of an inference. Best, Barkeep49 (talk)
  • "In 2014 an audiobook read by John Keating and accompanied by string instruments to represent the fish was released.[7]" - Wait, how would string instruments represent the fish? Isn't the fish the narrator? And which fish - the smaller or larger one? Can you clarify?
The source mentions how it's done like in Peter in the Wolf so I have added that context. I haven't listened to it so I can't say but the big fish never speaks so I'm presuming that the music cues represent the actions on wordless pages. Best, Barkeep49 (talk)
Plot
  • " The little fish remains convinced that the theft will not be found out, but at the end of the story the big fish is wearing the hat." - is there any explanation for how the big fish reacquires the hat?
It's intentionally left ambiguous in the text - this ambiguity is directly addressed in the first sentence of the next section. Most people (including me) seem to think the little fish was eaten but we have no textual evidence for that and unlike in I Want My Hat Back I didn't have a source with Klassen giving his authorial statement of what happened. Best, Barkeep49 (talk)
Writing and illustrations
  • "The book suggests both not to steal but that if you do steal not to get caught.[8]" - wordy
I could make it two sentences that would be the roughly the same number of total words if it helps? I'm kind of stumped because if it's unclear I can think of ways to add words to clarify but can't figure out a way to express that idea with fewer words. Best, Barkeep49 (talk)
  • "The reader is invited to both cheer for the little fish's escape and for the little fish to be punished for the theft.[12][13] " - not sure "invited" is the best word choice
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  • "Critics wondered if the book's success was a sign that even young children were able to pick-up on ironic humor[14][15] " - don't need "even"
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  • "The perspective of the illustrations also never change" - subject/verb don't agree
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Reception and awards
  • "This is Not My Hat received favorable reviews including starred reviews from Booklist" - same note as above about starred reviews
Starred reviews is a term in the field of book reviews denoting a book of particular distinction. It's on my list to write an article about someday but for now I could add a note as I did here. Best, Barkeep49 (talk)
  • " from Booklist which praised the books humor and notes its "suggestively dark conclusion"[16]," - switching verb tenses
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  • "This is Not My Hat received favorable reviews including starred reviews from Booklist which praised the books humor and notes its "suggestively dark conclusion"[16], The Bulletin of the Center for Children's Books which called the book "quite simply, an outstanding book, The Horn Book Magazine[12], Publishers Weekly writing "Klassen excels at using pictures to tell the parts of the story his unreliable narrators omit or evade"[18] and School Library Journal.[17]" - too many ideas for one sentence. Maybe split into two or even three sentences to allow you to provide the quotes without overextending the sentence length!
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  • "In a highly recommend review for Library Media Connection library Lisa Wright writes, " - "highly recommend review"? What does that mean?
It's their equivalent of starred. I put it in quotes to help clarify. Best, Barkeep49 (talk)
  • "" The narrative parallels the illustrations" - extra space
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  • "Library Media Connection library" - Is the second "library" a typo?
Should have been librarian denoting who Lisa Wright is. Best, Barkeep49 (talk)
  • You need to check which of the sources you mention here (newspapers, magazines, etc.) need to be italicized.
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  • "the combined sales of it and I Want My Hat Back was more than a 1.5 million copies.[6][19]" - subject/verb don't agree
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  • "It was the winner of the 2013 Caldecott Medal" - I'd remention the book title or say "The book" since this is a new paragraph.
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  • "was also awarded with a Caldecot Honor that same year for Extra Yarn, " - Is "Extra Yarn" a book? It should be italicized if so.
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  • "Caldecott Chair Sandra Imdieke said praised" - extra word?
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  • "Klassen is the first person to win both the Greenaway and Caldecott awards for the same work[26][Notes 1]" - Punctuation missing. Also, should be "note 1" rather than "notes 1"

  Done

Image
  • "Author Klassen notes that his favorite kind of hat is "A good old-fashioned baseball cap. I wear one all the time, and have since grade school".[1]" - Don't need to include this quote in the image caption. More crufty than encyclopedic.
I've removed it but the guy has written three books about hats and so I found it fun, if not essential, which is why I put it as a caption. Best, Barkeep49 (talk)

References

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  • What makes 100scopenotes.com a reliable source per WP:RS?
SLJ blogs have editorial controls. The author of this blog is a former member of the Caldecott committee suggesting an appropriate level of expertise to offer opinions. Best, Barkeep49 (talk)
  • What makes www.hbook.com a reliable source?
The Horn Book Magazine is a leading, and the oldest, journal dedicated to children's literature. Best, Barkeep49 (talk)

Images

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All in all, a solid article. Prose needs a bit of fine-tuning. ceranthor 15:53, 28 March 2019 (UTC)Reply

@Ceranthor: Thanks for your review. See my responses above. Best, Barkeep49 (talk) 16:57, 28 March 2019 (UTC)Reply
@Barkeep49: Going to pass, conditional on one request - can you add the footnote like you did for Crown:_An_Ode_to_the_Fresh_Cut? Otherwise, great work. ceranthor 17:37, 28 March 2019 (UTC)Reply
Ceranthor   Done. Thanks for your energy and efforts in this process. Best, Barkeep49 (talk) 17:51, 28 March 2019 (UTC)Reply
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