Talk:Tue Rechnung! Donnerwort, BWV 168/GA1
Latest comment: 9 years ago by Gerda Arendt in topic GA Review
GA Review
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Reviewer: Jaguar (talk · contribs) 15:42, 16 September 2015 (UTC)
Will finish this soon... JAGUAR 15:42, 16 September 2015 (UTC)
Initial comments
edit- "Bach used a text by Salomo Franck which the librettist had published in Weimar already in 1715 but which Bach had not set to music then" - might sound better as Bach used a text by Salomo Franck which the librettist had already published in Weimar in 1715, however Bach had not set to music then. Also what does it mean when Bach had not set it to music? Was he born then?
- Bach had composed many cantatas by Franck in 1715 - when both worked in Weimar together - until a public mourning period interrupted. Compare BWV 165. --GA
- "It is the first new composition in his third year as Thomaskantor in Leipzig" - should this be in past tense?
- English is not not what I know best ;) --GA
- "Franck published the text of Tue Rechnung! Donnerwort in 1715 in Evangelisches Andachts-Opffer" - too many "in"s. Was the text in Evangelisches Andachts-Opffer? If so, it might sound better as part of
- done --GA
- "for the eleventh Sunday after Trinity" - should "eleventh" be capitalised? I'm going by the fact that Ninth Sunday after Trinity was capitalised earlier in the section
- done --GA
- thought again, adjusted the other way, as in the lead --Gerda Arendt (talk) 22:03, 16 September 2015 (UTC)
- done --GA
- "showing his "familiarity with the best contemporary operatic styles"" - I think this could be paraphrased slightly. It might read better as showing his familiarity with "the best contemporary operatic styles" (just moving the quotations around)
- thanks --GA
- "reflects "Herz, zerreiß des Mammons Kette".(Heart, rend..." - space after full stop
- good catch --GA
- "(Strengthen me with Your joyful Spirit,)" - comma after bracket
- yes --GA
References
edit- Ref 7 needs an access date
- as last one: no accessdate for a book, right? --GA
- Thank you for careful reading and suggestions, taken, --Gerda Arendt (talk) 21:32, 16 September 2015 (UTC)
On hold
editThis is another well written and informative article. Those were the only prose issues I could find, but other than that it looks good. Once all the above are clarified then this should be good to go. I am still learning! JAGUAR 19:03, 16 September 2015 (UTC)
- Thanks for addressing them! This should be good to go now. JAGUAR 21:17, 17 September 2015 (UTC)
- Thank you. Perfect timing for a word of thunder. --Gerda Arendt (talk) 21:30, 17 September 2015 (UTC)