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Talk:USS Helena (CL-50)/GA1

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Latest comment: 5 years ago by CPA-5 in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Latest comment: 5 years ago15 comments2 people in discussion
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Reviewer: CPA-5 (talk · contribs) 19:08, 18 August 2019 (UTC)Reply


Claim my seat here. I have to tell you I'm hungry for a new nomination. :p Cheers. CPA-5 (talk) 19:08, 18 August 2019 (UTC)Reply

Thanks CPA - this was a beast of an article to write, so take your time reviewing it. Parsecboy (talk) 11:58, 19 August 2019 (UTC)Reply
  • No thank you, every new B-, GA-, A- or FA-class makes Wikipedia a better place. I'd love to be polite to people who work hours and hours every day to make Wikipedia a better place. We probably won't finish all warships to at least GA-class in the coming ten years. I'd love to see an FA-MILHIST where almost all articles are FA-class. Let's hope we're still alive if that ever happens. :p

Part 1

  • limited to 10,000 long tons (10,000 t) Link both tonnes.
    • Done
  • resulting in the St. Louis sub-class Link St. Louis
    • There's no link for that
  • Helena was 607 feet 4.125 inches (185.11838 m) Both numbers are really specific.
    • I went with the figure provided in Friedman
  • in the mounts for the .50-cal guns Isn't .50 the same as in .5? Or is this really part of the gun?
    • Yeah, they're always called ".50" - see for instance .50 BMG, the name of the round the guns fired
  • was equipped with an anti-aircraft battery Add "(AA)" behind anti-aircraft.
    • Done
  • battery of eight 20 mm (0.79 in) Oerlikon cannon British plural form of cannon.
  • Link US Navy.
    • Done
  • She stopped in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba Guantanamo Bay isn't really part of Cuba.
    • Yeah it is, it's just leased to the US.
  • Hmm I know it is leased to the US, but do we really count it as leasing if the owner doesn't want the money and wants you to leave? That's exactly what the current Cuban government wants. it claims that the US "illegally occupied" the bay since the American–Spanish War. Of course, both countries say that the bay lies in Cuba but it's a de facto US territory. However, we're talking about the mid-1930s when a pro-US Cuban government was active, which means it's not really a problem here. But if we're talking the geographic region the bay itself then we better can use "in" instead of the comma after Bay. Cheers. CPA-5 (talk) 10:22, 21 August 2019 (UTC)Reply
  • True, it's no different from any other colonial acquisition (like Hong Kong 1841–1997). How about "She stopped in Guantanamo Bay, an American-leased naval base in Cuba..."?
  • Pipe Hawaii to the Territory of Hawaii.
    • Done
  • Link California.
    • My sense is, California would fall into the category of WP:OVERLINK geographical entities.
  • True, I understand your sense. But personally, outside the US it is not that popular or wide-known. I mean we Belgians (non-English natives) only know Holywood, LA and San Fransico at the West Coast. Before I was an editor I didn't know in which state those places were. I know they were at the West Coast but as a non-American, I can tell you we're not good in American states' geography. Nor Americans are about the EU. Cheers. CPA-5 (talk) 13:15, 21 August 2019 (UTC)Reply
  • ship received her 1.1-inch guns No metric units?
    • It's converted earlier
  • Is so weird that you and Sturm always use day/month/year instead of month/day/year style is there a good reason why?
    • The modern US military uses DMY so that's what we follow for modern American warships - this is long-established practice at WP:MILHIST (and everybody else on Earth uses DMY, so that's what we do for non-US ships too)
  • high-level bombers, and thirty-six fighters What kind of fighters?
    • Added the specific aircraft types
  • to block a Japanese squadron if it was detected by air Do we know which squadron?
    • It wasn't directed against a specific Japanese unit
  • lookouts aboard Helena and Boise Is there a link for lookouts?
    • Surprisingly, there is
  • attack from elements of the 164th Infantry Regiment Link the 164th Infantry Regiment.
    • It's linked earlier

I'll later continue. Stay tuned. Cheers. CPA-5 (talk) 13:25, 20 August 2019 (UTC)Reply

Sounds good. Parsecboy (talk) 19:17, 20 August 2019 (UTC)Reply
  • Helena thereafter went to Sydney, Australia Unlink Sydney because of common term.
    • Done
  • were then transferred to New Caledonia Add France here.
    • Changed to "transferred to the French colony of..." as saying "New Caledonia, France" suggests to the reader that New Caledonia is in Metropolitan France.
  • with many of the remainder from bomb You mean remainders?
    • No, it's the remainder of the casualties, those not killed or injured in the torpedo explosion
  • they were accidentally shooting at the leading You mean shot?
    • No, the gerund is right there
  • Scott missed a second group of warship Remove the "a" and replace it with "the".
    • In this case, because we haven't introduced the second Japanese unit, "a" is the right choice here
  • resupply their forces fighting on and around Guadalcanal You mean "in" instead of "on"?
    • To me, it sounds correct to say that one fights on an island, not in it.
  • supplies for the army already on Guadalacana Typo of Guadalcanal.
    • Fixed
  • despite the fact that he had not assigned Remove "despite the fact that" and replace it with "although".
    • Done
  • group of eleven float planes to scout Merge float planes.
    • Done
  • as a large Japanese air strike was detected Merge air strike.
    • Done
  • around the Kula Gulf on a number of occasions Remove "a number of" and replace it with "several".
    • Done
  • short skirmish at long range produced Long range needs an hyphen.
    • I don't think it does here - it's the same as "X class", in that it only needs a hyphen if the two words form a compound adjective. In this case, "range" is a noun and "long" is the adjective.
  • behind to help ferry men to American Merge ferry men.
    • No, "ferry" is the verb here.

That's it I will have a look in the sources, images and the infobox later. Cheers. CPA-5 (talk) 10:42, 21 August 2019 (UTC)Reply

Images

Sources

  • Why does have ref 74 no second-page number?
    • Fixed
  • Bonner's book should be linked with a Google Books' URL.
    • A bot has been going around and adding the archive.org URLs for some reason - I'm not particularly in favor of it, but I haven't bothered to fight the bot - and in any event, readers can click on the ISBN to find the book in any number of locations (including google books)
  • Domagalski's book is in the same situation as above.
    • As above
  • Damnit I cannot review Hanson's source due legal reasons!
  • Hammel's book need¨s "New York" as its location.
    • Good catch
  • Kilpatrick's book title needs a "the" article before Naval.
    • Added
  • Where are the publisher and location of Wright's source?
    • Added
  • Both the "Naval History and Heritage Command" and "USS Helena, Report of Pearl Harbor Attack dated 14 December 1941"'s external links are dead.
    • Cut them - the latter is cited in the article anyway, with a link that works.

Infobox

  • "Standard: 10,000 long tons (10,000 t)" Link both tonnes.
    • Done
  • "Full load: 13,327 long tons (13,541 t)" Link full load.
    • Done
  • "100,000 shp (75,000 kW)" Link both units.
    • Done
  • "12 × 20 mm (0.79 in) Oerlikon anti-aircraft cannons" In the infobox we use "cannons" as plural and in the body it is "cannon"?
    • Fixed the box

That's anything, I'll put it on hold. Cheers. CPA-5 (talk) 19:36, 26 August 2019 (UTC)Reply

Thanks again. Parsecboy (talk) 19:53, 26 August 2019 (UTC)Reply
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