Talk:Virtual Self (EP)/GA2
GA Review
editThe following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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Reviewer: Averageuntitleduser (talk · contribs) 04:57, 17 March 2024 (UTC)
It's great to see some Porter Robinson noms; I couldn't help myself! Averageuntitleduser (talk) 04:57, 17 March 2024 (UTC)
Good Article review progress box
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Well-written
editI quite like the article's structure and balance. I especially like the short paragraphs and, specifically, the general "Concept and inspiration" info which then goes deeper into the production and visuals. I did a copyedit, and I'm left with only a few comments:
- "an alias with its visuals" and "sound inspired by early 2000s" could be construed as different ideas, perhaps: "an alias whose visuals and sound were inspired by the early 2000s".
- The above point might be moot because of this: Robinson's inspiration of early 2000s aesthetics is mentioned three times in the lead in similar ways. I think "an alias whose visuals and sound were inspired by the early 2000s" is redundant considering the sentence afterwards.
- Reworded
melodic-based
— remove "based" or say, perhaps: "his 2012 song 'Language' featured a more melodic sound".- Done
something for him to resist
— this feels too indirect, like someone else is making him resist his old sound, perhaps: "something he tried to resist".- Done
to release something similar to a follow-up album
— he described Virtual Self as a follow-up so I would reword this as: "to release a similar follow-up album".- Done
However, he still needed to gather dynamic graphics
— the "However" feels odd, is this really a contrasting phrase? It feels more constrictive.- Reworded
he still needed
— when put this way, it is unclear whether he did this or not.- Reworded
He then directly referenced
— to who, the video artists?- Reworded
A music video was released, containing cryptic messages.
— a music video of which song?- "Eon Break". Fixed.
- "Released" is used a lot in the "Promotion and release" section, you could do something like: "On January 11 that year, a music video for "Particle Arts" was released, alongside one for 'Ghost Voices' on February 28 and one for 'Key' on April 18."
- That is really nice. Done.
said the Virtual Self alias was a "high concept musical nerdiness"
— this is a descriptor rather than a noun. You could say something along the lines of: "described the Virtual Self project as 'high concept musical nerdiness'".- Done
Verifiable with no original research
editIn terms of the use of secondary sources for which TechnoSquirrel quickfailed the article, I'm gonna steal the words of voorts, I agree with you in part. Of course, if good secondary sources could be used for the "Concept and inspiration" section, then I would encourage that, as I did in my review of Corey Olsen, where we rewrote and referenced most of the "Academic career" section. However, this is a different case. The vast majority of material about the EP's production only exists in interviews. And I don't have many issues with reliability, as the article only uses these for his opinion. But still, I respect TechnoSquirrel's commitment to quality sourcing, and I think his suggestions have been very helpful to the "Background" section.
For copyvio, the quotes are sharp and paraphrasing is used well. Earwig shows a good score of 36% (the first URL was a copypaste of the article, no issues). And to go into detail about reliability, although iFlyer and Hypebeast are questionable, they're basically 10% interview questions and 90% answers. The Forbes piece is written by a contributer, but it's only cited once and for Robinson's statements. Dancing Astronaut is not the pinnacle of quality, but its use is uncontroversial, mainly for the date of the tweet. However:
- I would replace the DJ Mag Asia source with this EDM.com source, it's still not great, but it's a little better (and still, it's an uncontroversial claim).
- Cameron, John (January 22, 2020). "Porter Robinson Announces Virtual Self Artbook and Chloma Fashion Collab". EDM.com. Archived from the original on January 30, 2020. Retrieved March 19, 2024.
Yeah the Dancing Astronaut one is a source I wouldn't like to use; in fact, I've asked WP:RSP about electronic music sources, including EDM.com and Dancing Astronaut, and the result wasn't great. Indeed, its use was just for the date of the tweet, since the Billboard source was pubished much later, though I could add the Billboard one alongside the tweet itself. DJ Mag Asia is a branch of DJ Mag, so I assumed it would be reliable, but they aren't the same magazine, so possibly not. So honestly, I don't think DJ Mag Asia or EDM.com are good. For now I will add the EDM.com source alongside the DJ Mag Asia one; however, I plan to go to FAC in the future, so I might need to remove them if FAC reviewers don't find them reliable enough. Skyshiftertalk 20:23, 20 March 2024 (UTC)
- Good idea: I imagine the tweet would be fine as a primary source. And I'm not sure how I missed DJ Mag Asia being a branch, forgive me! (Admittedly, it seemed like a blog at a glance, and I haven't found a mention of the parent company.) I believe it's enough for GA, but yeah, it might need some consideration for FAC. Averageuntitleduser (talk) 21:03, 20 March 2024 (UTC)
- I've added the tweet, replacing Dancing Astronaut, and removed the EDM.com source, as I believe DJ Mag Asia is superior for being a branch of DJ Mag. Skyshiftertalk 21:37, 20 March 2024 (UTC)
Spot-check
edit- Lhooq, Michelle (2018-02-18). "Porter Robinson's ambitious, human Virtual Self". The Fader. Archived from the original on September 6, 2023. Retrieved 2023-11-24.
- Wow, looks good
- Ochoa, John (2018-02-15). "Porter Robinson: DJ Mag North America cover feature". DJ Mag. Archived from the original on March 15, 2018. Retrieved 2023-11-26.
- Looks good as well
- Miller, Isabella (2022-05-18). ""I Don't Take That Lightly" Porter Robinson Interviewed". Clash. Photography by Rachel Lipsitz. Archived from the original on September 6, 2023. Retrieved 2023-09-06.
- Looks good
- Bein, Kat (2018-03-07). "Six new songs you need to know this week (05/03/18)". BBC. Retrieved 2023-12-17.
- Just genre stuff, but looks good
- Sherburne, Philip (2018-01-03). "Virtual Self: Virtual Self EP Album Review". Pitchfork. Archived from the original on 2018-01-03. Retrieved 2018-02-03.
- Looks good
Broad in its coverage
editI've done a search for sources, and I'm quite confident that the article adresses all the major aspects.
Neutral
editNo issues on this front.
Stable
editNo recent content disputes or edit wars.
Illustrated
editAll images are relevant, the comparison of the Pathselector and Technic-Angel songs is clever. The first tour image is correctly labeled as Creative Commons, while the DDR and second tour image are own works. The album cover and sound samples have satisfactory fair use rationales (the samples are fine for the EP article, at least).
Summary
editA lovely article once again! Averageuntitleduser (talk) 01:46, 20 March 2024 (UTC)
- @Averageuntitleduser: Thank you for all the compliments throughout the review :) (and your copyedits!) Everything has been responded to! Skyshiftertalk 20:23, 20 March 2024 (UTC)
- Amid the sourcing comments, I am happy to pass this article! Averageuntitleduser (talk) 21:34, 20 March 2024 (UTC)
- Thank you! Skyshiftertalk 21:37, 20 March 2024 (UTC)
- Amid the sourcing comments, I am happy to pass this article! Averageuntitleduser (talk) 21:34, 20 March 2024 (UTC)