Talk:William of Blois (poet)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Amitchell125 (talk · contribs) 07:14, 1 March 2021 (UTC)

Happy to review this article.

I've amended the sources slightly to remove Harvard error messages (I get them but you may not). Amitchell125 (talk) 08:08, 1 March 2021 (UTC)

Review

Lead section / Infobox

• Link abbot, monastery.
  • Done. Ealdgyth (talk) 23:05, 8 March 2021 (UTC)
• The lead could include a little more information.
• The infobox needs the full version of the abbey’s name, as in the article.
  • Done. Ealdgyth (talk) 23:05, 8 March 2021 (UTC)
• The phrase in southern Italy seems vague, I would name the relevant kingdom, region or town.
  • Done. Ealdgyth (talk) 23:05, 8 March 2021 (UTC)
• I'm not sure why 'William' and not the name William of Blois is used in the infobox.
  • Fixed. Ealdgyth (talk) 23:05, 8 March 2021 (UTC)

Family and early life

• I would introduce Blois as a city.
  • Done. Ealdgyth (talk) 23:05, 8 March 2021 (UTC)
• Are the names of Peter’s sisters (or anything else about them) known?
• The phrase some nobility if not much wealth needs clarification.
  • Try this? Ealdgyth (talk) 23:05, 8 March 2021 (UTC)
• Could arriving shortly after be made more specific?
  • Clarified Ealdgyth (talk) 23:05, 8 March 2021 (UTC)
• William was from the Loire Valley - this is not what Cotts says on p20.
  • I have hunted on my shelves for a copy of Cotts. I cannot find it. If you would be so good as to amend whatever is incorrect and differs from Cotts, that'd be great. I'll keep looking - at this point, I'm so tired of unpacking that I'm about to burn all the unpacked boxes to spare myself the bother of trying to find space.... Ealdgyth (talk) 23:05, 8 March 2021 (UTC)

Cotts is available (see below). Amitchell125 (talk) 15:57, 20 March 2021 (UTC)

Unfortunately, I'm in the US and page 20 is not available on preview for me. I had a copy at some point - its gone missing in the move and I have no clue where it is. Ealdgyth (talk) 16:43, 20 March 2021 (UTC)

Writing career

• Link Latin, manuscripts, immured.
  • Done the first two - the last I changed to "imprisoned" Ealdgyth (talk) 23:05, 8 March 2021 (UTC)
• As no dates are mentioned before this section, could the previous section include any information about when he might have been born (the sources mention his brother's birth)?
  • Sharpe nor White mention even a possible birth date - Sharpe just says "12th century" and White neglects it totally. Does Cotts mention any guesses on birthdate? Ealdgyth (talk) 23:05, 8 March 2021 (UTC)

Nothing in Cotts either. Amitchell125 (talk) 15:57, 20 March 2021 (UTC)

• Did Peter only write in Latin? If true, you could mention this without then needing to mention the language each individual work was written in.
  • I do not have a source that says he only wrote in Latin. Yes, the surviving works and the works assigned to him are Latin, but I'm hesitant to say he only wrote in Latin. Ealdgyth (talk) 23:05, 8 March 2021 (UTC)

OK. Amitchell125 (talk) 15:59, 20 March 2021 (UTC)

• The phrase at least seems redundant.
• Do the themes refer to Peter’s dramas or to all his works? It's not clear to me why you refer to them as being major.
• Latin Elegaic comedies links to a genre,but in the text it's not clear if the phrase is a genre or the name of something WofB wrote.
• I would mention at this stage what kind of work Flaura et Marcus was.
• Introduce Matthew of Vendôme
• the device of pretending to be a woman – I would emphasise it was a young man pretending to be a sister, as the source states.
• Are the locations of the manuscripts known? the Iurgia muscae et pulicis, surviving in one manuscript - see here and here for information about where I think the document is located.
• White refers to six complete manuscripts for Alda
• Alda (comedy) is red linked on the disambiguation page Alda. I would also make it a red link in the article. The articles Guglielmo di Blois and Alda (Guglielmo di Blois) in the Italian Wikipedia may be of use.
• A url for Alda (and the preface for it) can be found here - worth including?

Clerical career

• Link Sicily (Kingdom of Sicily), bishopric, England (Kingdom of England)
• Is a candidate correct – he seems to have had a competitor.
• There is some confusion over the name of this abbey – the name was not what caused confusion, surely?
• In 1179/80 – could be misinterpreted by readers. Does it mean over the period of two years, or either one year or the other, or the end of 1179, etc.?
• The sentence containing ‘William received letters from his brother saying that William’ could be more eloquently phrased.
• This has since been disproven. Any information about when and by whom?
• William had not acquired his position in the best manner – seems euphemistically put. Cotts says William acquired his position illicitly.
• Margaret of Navarre – I would consider naming her as queen consort of the kingdom of Sicily, and not simply as the queen.
• but it is not known if he actually left – is this editorial speculation?

Notes

• Consider links for French and Latin.

References

• White’s article is from pp. 487–490; imo more information could be gleaned from the pages you haven’t cited.
• Link Urban T. Holmes Jr..
• Several urls are available for this section:

1. Sedgewick - https://www.jstor.org/stable/2848746?seq=1
2. Holmes & Weedon - https://www.jstor.org/stable/2849952?seq=1
3. Carver - https://www.jstor.org/stable/43447768
4. Cotts - https://www.google.co.uk/books/edition/The_Clerical_Dilemma/CaXAxbZPM6gC?hl=en&gbpv=1&printsec=frontcover
5. Elliott - https://books.google.co.uk/books?id=G55RAQAAIAAJ&source=gbs_navlinks_s
6. Bishop - https://www.jstor.org/stable/25096134

• Consider adding (subscription required) where appropriate.
• Elliott, not Elliot.

That's all I could find, please ping me to discuss anything arising from my comments. On hold for a week until 13 March to allow amendments to be made. Regards, Amitchell125 (talk) 13:35, 1 March 2021 (UTC)

• • Started work - will keep going for the next few days. Ealdgyth (talk) 23:05, 8 March 2021 (UTC)

@Amitchell125: Work has slammed me - it's going to be a few more days before I can finish this off. Sorry. Will that be okay? Ealdgyth (talk) 13:33, 13 March 2021 (UTC)

@Ealdgyth: Of course—I'm a little distracted myself with family, the growing season for my allotment, and work on Stanisław Egbert Koźmian. I'll check again in a week's time. Amitchell125 (talk) 13:40, 13 March 2021 (UTC)

I'm jealous - our growning season hasn't even started yet - we're going to be getting snow Monday .. heh. Ealdgyth (talk) 13:43, 13 March 2021 (UTC)

@Ealdgyth: not a lot seems to be happening here, I'm failing the article in the next couple of days unless the issues identified are addressed. Amitchell125 (talk) 16:47, 20 March 2021 (UTC)

I'm just completely swamped in real life and will not have the time to go digging through tons of bookboxes trying to find one book. When I nominated this, I was not aware I was going to have some big projects outside of WP dropped on my lap, so I had the thought I'd have more time for this. Sorry. Ealdgyth (talk) 16:54, 20 March 2021 (UTC)