Template:Did you know nominations/Cecile Hoover Edwards
- The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
The result was: promoted by Allen3 talk 11:58, 30 October 2015 (UTC)
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Cecile Hoover Edwards
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that Cecile Hoover Edwards graduated high school at 15, and later focused her scientific career on the amino acid composition of foods to improve the health of African-American cuisine?
- Reviewed: Greenhouse Software
Moved to mainspace by Sisterchemist3 (talk), Antony-22 (talk), and Yoninah (talk). Nominated by Antony-22 (talk) at 00:39, 6 October 2015 (UTC).
- Ada Lovelace Day late nominee needs help to rush for Tuesday Victuallers (talk) 00:42, 11 October 2015 (UTC)
- Hi, I came by to review this but found the information rather scanty and only 2 refs. I added more reliable refs such as encyclopedia dictionaries, and also linked it to other Wikipedia pages so it wouldn't be an orphan. I guess I've recused myself from reviewing this, but I would appreciate a DYK creation co-credit. Thanks, Yoninah (talk) 18:27, 11 October 2015 (UTC)
Good length article with good sourcing. Its neutral and I can see no paraphrasing. There was no image but I've added one but its not free. The hook above is quite complex and I couldn't clearly see the causality. However I have suggested some hooks that someone might tick.Victuallers (talk) 21:46, 27 October 2015 (UTC)
..(alt1). that the nutritionist Cecile Hoover Edwards studied people who ate things with no nutritional value?...(alt2). that Cecile Hoover Edwards tried to work out how you could get the best nutrition for your money?
- ALT1 isn't in the article, and ALT2 is boring. Yes, the original hook contains two unrelated facts, but they are much more interesting. How about this shorter version?
- ALT3:
... that nutritionist Cecile Hoover Edwards studied the amino acid composition of foods to improve the health of African-American cuisine? - ALT4:
... that the State of Illinois has declared April 5 to be "Dr. Cecile Hoover Edwards Day"? Antony–22 (talk⁄contribs) 08:53, 28 October 2015 (UTC)
Alt 4 is fine although I would add "nutritionist". So "..Illinois honored a nutritionist and declared" so that the reader knows something about her. Alt3 still suffers from lack of causality. Nice article. Cheers Victuallers (talk) 08:03, 29 October 2015 (UTC)
@Victuallers: ALT4 is inaccurate; the date was only declared for April 5, 1984, not every year after that. You could say:
- ALT5: ... that the State of Illinois declared April 5, 1984 to be nutritionist "Dr. Cecile Hoover Edwards Day"? Yoninah (talk) 01:59, 30 October 2015 (UTC)
- The source says "In 1984 the State of Illinois declared April 5 to be 'Dr. Cecile Hoover Edwards Day.'"
I'll change the article wording to reflect this.Antony–22 (talk⁄contribs) 05:27, 30 October 2015 (UTC) - Upon perusing other sources, it seems you're right. What was the problem with ALT3 anyway? What does "lack of causality" mean? Antony–22 (talk⁄contribs) 05:31, 30 October 2015 (UTC)
- Thanks for catching that. It was written ambiguously but I assumed the hook was the correct interpretation. Antony - Lack of causality means can we prove that one thing causes another. In the case of the main hook it talks about investigating amino acids and improving diets. Both of these are discussed in the article. The hook says that she studied these things "to improve" <--- that's the causality I'm referring to. I cannot see that link in the article or the source I read. Its implied but not explicit. (The hook implies that she did this for the whole of her career which I didn't see written down.) If you change "to improve" to "and improve" then that would better match the article and remove the causality.... or put the causality into the article and source it. I hope that helps. Victuallers (talk) 08:08, 30 October 2015 (UTC)
- Okay, I see what you mean. Whenever I hear the word "causality" I think about that Star Trek episode where they're stuck in a time loop and Frasier is captain of the other ship. Does this new hook properly reflect the relationship between the two clauses? Antony–22 (talk⁄contribs) 10:33, 30 October 2015 (UTC)
- ALT6: ... that Cecile Hoover Edwards, an expert on African-American nutrition, sought to identify low-cost foods with an optimal amino acid composition?
- Thanks for catching that. It was written ambiguously but I assumed the hook was the correct interpretation. Antony - Lack of causality means can we prove that one thing causes another. In the case of the main hook it talks about investigating amino acids and improving diets. Both of these are discussed in the article. The hook says that she studied these things "to improve" <--- that's the causality I'm referring to. I cannot see that link in the article or the source I read. Its implied but not explicit. (The hook implies that she did this for the whole of her career which I didn't see written down.) If you change "to improve" to "and improve" then that would better match the article and remove the causality.... or put the causality into the article and source it. I hope that helps. Victuallers (talk) 08:08, 30 October 2015 (UTC)
- The source says "In 1984 the State of Illinois declared April 5 to be 'Dr. Cecile Hoover Edwards Day.'"
- ALT3:
Alt 5 or 6 are fine. see above for detail. Thanks for your patience Antony and the article. Victuallers (talk) 10:53, 30 October 2015 (UTC)