- The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
The result was: promoted by Cwmhiraeth (talk) 06:33, 6 February 2020 (UTC)
Mastoureh Afshar
5x expanded by Droodkin (talk). Self-nominated at 10:25, 10 January 2020 (UTC).
| General: Article is new enough and long enough
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| Policy: Article is sourced, neutral, and free of copyright problems
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| Hook: Hook has been verified by provided inline citation
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Overall: 
Article expanded 5 times before nomination. Hook is sourced and reasonably considered to be interesting. No other problems are apparent. Looks GTG. Makeandtoss (talk) 02:12, 28 January 2020 (UTC)
I'm not so sure about this; in particular, I'm kind of worried about the use of the word "radicalist" in the hook. Perhaps a less-sensitive wording could be proposed here? Narutolovehinata5 tccsdnew 03:18, 28 January 2020 (UTC)
- Hello, thank you for your feedback. I proposed an alternative hook that omits the radicalist part.Droodkin (talk) 06:10, 30 January 2020 (UTC)
- Hi, I came by to promote this, but now it's not so hooky if you don't know what the Patriotic Womens League of Iran is. Better hook wording is needed here. Yoninah (talk) 18:45, 1 February 2020 (UTC)
- Hello, thank you for your suggestion. I have proposed ALT2 with regards to your point. Droodkin (talk) 20:50, 1 February 2020 (UTC)
- @Droodkin: Well, in the article lead you call it "radicalist", so ALT2 doesn't work. Generally, "Did you know ... that X=Y" is not an interesting hook. Perhaps you could say more about what the organization aimed to achieve, or work something around her role at the Tehran congress. Yoninah (talk) 00:56, 3 February 2020 (UTC)
- @Yoninah: Hello, I've proposed ALT3 as an alternative. I am on the fence of including 'Eastern Women's Congress' vs just 'Women's Congress', out of character length concerns. Hopefully third time's the charm. Droodkin (talk) 08:20, 3 February 2020 (UTC)
- Yes, thank you! ALT3 hook ref verified and cited inline. I agree that a little more detail about the congress should be added so it doesn't sound like it was the first. I would also remove the sea of blue next to the bolded subject. Here is my tweak
- ALT3a: ... that in 1932, Iranian women's rights activist Mastoureh Afshar organized the Second Eastern Women's Congress in Tehran, which drew delegates from Afghanistan to Zanzibar?
- ALT3a good to go. Yoninah (talk) 12:12, 3 February 2020 (UTC)
Article expanded 5 times before nomination. Hook is sourced and reasonably considered to be interesting. No other problems are apparent. Looks GTG. Makeandtoss (talk) 02:12, 28 January 2020 (UTC)
