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Template:Did you know nominations/Mining in Sweden

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The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: rejected by Yoninah (talk) 21:54, 12 September 2018 (UTC)
Poor writing

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Mining in Sweden

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Created/expanded by Newroderick895 (talk). Self-nominated at 11:01, 10 June 2018 (UTC).

    • @Sam Sailor: I have cleaned up the mess, is it perfectly enough for you to review it right now? Newroderick895 18:08, 20 June 2018 (UTC)
    • The English needs basic help, and the distinction needs to be clear between where the metal was mined and where the products were made. Johnbod (talk) 21:53, 25 June 2018 (UTC)
    • I did a major rewrite of the problem English, so please re-review? This is an interesting article that many readers might like. I notice that the suggested hooks also need some English-improvement, so adding another suggestion:
  • ALT3 ... that the Swedish mining industry plans to demolish a small Arctic town and move it 2 miles away from a rich source of iron ore? Source:https://www.theguardian.com/cities/2015/jul/30/kiruna-the-arctic-city-being-knocked-down-and-relocated-two-miles-awayHouseOfChange (talk) 19:12, 14 July 2018 (UTC)
  • ALT4 :... that the paint falu red was made in Sweden's Falun Mine?
  • There is a problem with ALT0. The source says that Swedish axe was made, not with Swedish copper but with copper from Cyprus. Therefore the connection to Swedish mining is not strong. HouseOfChange (talk) 19:24, 16 July 2018 (UTC)
  • Maybe review it anway while i changed it, but too bad i cant put anymore alternatives because it time consuming and i have to go shopping. Maybe soon? Newroderick895 15:48, 20 July 2018 (UTC)

@Newroderick895, Sam Sailor, and Johnbod: This nomination has been sitting around for a while, and it's been over a month since the last review. The article looks fine to me now but the writing is still a bit clunky in places (like with excessive uses of the word "and" in some sentences). Once this is addressed I can do a full review. Narutolovehinata5 tccsdnew 07:01, 23 August 2018 (UTC)

  • In addition, the sentence "Income from the Falun mine funded almost all of Sweden's wars throughout its history" could work as a hook, but it doesn't appear to be verified in any of the sources in the article. Narutolovehinata5 tccsdnew 07:03, 23 August 2018 (UTC)
  • I'm not really reviewing this. The English seems adequate after a small change. To me the world's heaviest coins, the copper Swedish riksdaler, would be the best hook, but there's nothing in the article on them. Or the town relocation. Johnbod (talk) 17:31, 23 August 2018 (UTC)
  • @Sam Sailor and HouseOfChange: The nominator hasn't edited since August 18. Should we still proceed with the nomination? Narutolovehinata5 tccsdnew 23:15, 3 September 2018 (UTC)
  • As the nominator has not edited since August 18, added to the fact that the writing still feels clunky and some statements continue to lack sources, unless another editor decides to adopt this nomination, it is with regret that I am marking this for closure. Narutolovehinata5 tccsdnew 13:47, 6 September 2018 (UTC)
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