Template:Did you know nominations/Multigrain bread
- The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
The result was: promoted by Yoninah (talk) 23:23, 21 May 2015 (UTC)
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Multigrain bread
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- ... that a recipe for brewing beer from loaves of multigrain bread (pictured) mixed with honey dates to approximately 4,000 years ago from ancient Mesopotamia, and is the oldest surviving beer recipe in the world?
- Reviewed: Colin Bloomfield
Created by Northamerica1000 (talk). Self-nominated at 03:50, 1 May 2015 (UTC).
New enough, long enough, meets core content policies. Hook cited to RS. Another nice food article. --Jakob (talk) aka Jakec 17:43, 1 May 2015 (UTC)
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- Yoninah: Actually, per WP:WIADYK the word (pictured) and the ellipsis (...) is not included in character counts. When calculated accordingly, the hook has 198 characters, which is below the 200-character limit. While it could be shortened, this would make the hook less interesting and less likely to create intrigue. North America1000 21:52, 3 May 2015 (UTC)
- Well, I found the hook hard to read, with some confusion in the juxtaposition of "honey dates" and also the repetition of "beer" and "recipe". Here's an alt:
- ALT1:
... that a 4,000-year-old formula for brewing beer from loaves of multigrain bread (pictured) mixed with honey is the oldest surviving beer recipe in the world?Yoninah (talk) 22:26, 3 May 2015 (UTC)
- This image is also sharper:
- Regarding ALT1, none of the sources refer to the recipe as a formula, so this aspect of ALT1 is inaccurate (sources used all state that it's a recipe). I'm okay with either image being used. Of note is that the second image provided is a sprouted multigrain bread, whereas the original is not sprouted. I still prefer the initial hook, due to the inaccuracy in ALT1 and feel that including the Mesopotamian origin is functional to further invoke intrigue regarding the hook. Also, I don't feel that users will confuse the phrase in the hook "honey dates", referring to the age of the recipe, with the date variety Honey date. North America1000 23:08, 3 May 2015 (UTC)
- OK. But would you consider at least tightening the hook?
- ALT2:
... that a recipe for brewing beer from loaves of multigrain bread (pictured) mixed with honey, dating back 4,000 years to ancient Mesopotamia, is the oldest surviving beer recipe in the world?Yoninah (talk) 23:16, 3 May 2015 (UTC) - I have struck ALT1 due to the aforementioned inaccuracy. A problem with ALT2 is that the recipe is quite likely not exactly 4,000 years old. For example, this source states that it "dates back about 4,000 years". As such, this aspect of ALT2 is less than entirely accurate. I also think it's functional to include the link to the Ancient history article, to provide more comprehensive context. I prefer the initial hook at this time. North America1000 23:35, 3 May 2015 (UTC)