Template:Did you know nominations/Whampoa anchorage

The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by Hawkeye7 (talk) 20:26, 14 October 2014 (UTC)

Whampoa anchorage

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... that a supercargo on an East Indiaman could take a sloop from Whampoa anchorage (pictured) to Jack-ass Point at the Thirteen Factories?

Comment: I do not know how many linked words are acceptable in a hook, there were so many nice names and expressions in this article^^, but links can of course be removed if necessary.

5x expanded by W.carter (talk). Self nominated at 11:38, 5 October 2014 (UTC).

Date, size, refs, neutrality are fine. But hook fails: the one sentence that mentions the sloop is unreferenced and does mention the Jack-ass Point. --_{Piotr Konieczny aka Prokonsul Piotrus| reply here} 10:56, 6 October 2014 (UTC)

Thank you for the review. The sentence with the sloop is covered by the ref later on in the section, it had just "slid down" during editing, now replaced and fixed. As for the rest, I have only done two DYK's before and I did not realize that all of it had to be in the same sentence, this was more of a summery from the article. I will think about it and come back with an ALT later today when I have more time. Best, w.carter-Talk 11:33, 6 October 2014 (UTC)

Comment: DYKs should generally have the link to the new article first so I would suggest:

ALT1: ... that from the Whampoa anchorage (pictured) a supercargo on an East Indiaman could to take a sloop to Jack-ass point at the Thirteen Factories?

Note: "sloop" delinked. Philg88 ^♦talk 12:18, 6 October 2014 (UTC)

Comment: @Philg88:Thanks, Kemo Sabe, for the info and excellent suggestion. I'd go with that, if it's ok with the reviewer. w.carter-Talk 14:53, 6 October 2014 (UTC)

It's GTG now, but I do think that the prose of the first hook flows better. I have seen many hooks where the new article is not the first link. Let the closing admin chose, I guess. --_{Piotr Konieczny aka Prokonsul Piotrus| reply here} 07:55, 7 October 2014 (UTC)

Thanks! And "sloop" can of course be delinked in that version too if need be. Best, w.carter-Talk 08:32, 7 October 2014 (UTC)

ALT2: ... that the Whampoa anchorage (pictured) was sometimes the starting point for a supercargo on an East Indiaman going to Jack-ass point at the Thirteen Factories? - w.carter-Talk 10:19, 7 October 2014 (UTC)