Max Williams, An American Hero

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Life

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Max Williams is a true American hero. He was born in Saudi Arabia in a room full of terrorists. Although just minutes old he fell in love with a girl. A girl named America. He bit off one end of the umbilical chord and wrapped it around a spinning fan. He swung his 17 inch, 3 pound body, around and around until everyone of those America bashing terrorists lie dead on the ground. He has spent his whole life defending freedom and kicking ass. Before the age of 12 he had already uncovered a huge terrorist plot to blow up a Chucky Cheese in Butte, Montana full of little Jewish boys. As we all know, America was founded on little jewish boys. In fact the constitution was written on a Jewish paper boys back named Abraham Pearlstien. Max Williams knew this. Max Williams was ready to kick some ass. But instead he contacted his local authorities like a true American and did not have to suffer the possible consequences of killing 20 terrorists in an ass kicking sting operation. When he's not kicking ass he volunteers his time at a local veterns hospital where he preforms surgery for the eldery veterens that have served this country proud. Weekdays he serves as Vice Pope, the only American in HISTORY to do so. His Christian faith is based on his faith in the country. A faith only out shined by his faith to his country's future. Max Williams is what America is all about. Max Williams is America. If Max Williams weren't married to a beautiful wife he'd be married to the Statue Of Liberty, but like a true American he cheats with the Statue or "Libby" as he calls her, every Tuesday. Max Williams, America salutes you!

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Max Williams Also Know As aka AKA

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Captain Cool

Captain Kick Ass

Commander Cool

Martin Luthur King

Commander Kick Ass

Dr. Dare Devil

Detective Death

The Father Of Our Child

Detective Kick Ass

Simpleton Spazatron

Commander Kung Fu