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Denmark (Danish: Danmark, IPA: [ˈd̥ænmɑɡ̊], (archaic:) IPA: [ˈd̥anmɑːɡ̊]) is a tiny country which should not be confused with the gigantic Kingdom of Denmark. Its administrative system is known for being dysfunctional.[1] This analysis has been corroborated by numerous sources. Repeated claims have almost always drawn huge audiences at prestigious institutions, indicating exceptional notability.
More recently, secessionist tendencies have significantly increased in Denmark, culminating in the recent proclamation of Sólrun Løkke Rasmussen as First Lady of Denmark[2], and have been seen as a clear and present danger to the precedence of Hendes Majestæt Dronning Margrethe II., the Monarch of the Kingdom of Denmark and Queen Regnant of Denmark.
These events are generally considered to constitute serious setbacks to the North Atlantic peace process, which was initiated by the Written Agreement between the Kingdom of Denmark and the renegade province of Iceland in 1997.[3] Iceland had unilaterally declared itself independent from Danish rule in 1940, and had been occupied subsequently by British and US military forces.[citation needed]
In addition to the aforementioned grave concerns about Denmark as a hotbed of regional instability, Denmark has continued to raise suspicion about its reliability on the international stage. The Kingdom of Denmark has branded a large section of its territory as "Greenland", although the territory has, according to multiple eyewitness accounts, not been green to any significant extent since AD 1300.[4] The successions of the Danish Prime Minister Rasmussen by Prime Minister Rasmussen in 2001 and, subsequently, by Prime Minister Rasmussen in 2009, have alerted the international community to the possibility of recurring meatpuppetry and sysop impersonation.
According to unproven and potentially unreliable sourcesrumours, it has been alleged that former Danish Prime Minister Rasmussen, in his capacity as General Secretary of a large transcontinental military organization, has been secretly conspiring with the High Representative of the Fourth Branch of Power of the United States of America to prevent Denmark from becoming a failed state, potentially harboring researchers who have recently threatened to destroy the Amalienborg Palace and other low-rise buildings in the Kingdom of Denmark with explosive residues collected from the dust of the World Trade Center if they would not be granted interviews by a government-owned TV station.
Hendes Majestæt Dronning Margrethe II., Monarch of the Kingdom of Denmark and Queen Regnant of Denmark, was overheard saying: "Personally, I don't like Cheney too much, but we really desperately need his help on this matter."[citation needed]
- ^ see Marcellus, personal statement, in: Hamlet 1.4, ca. 1600.
- ^ 129.240.0.83 vs. CardinalDan, April 10, 2009.
- ^ AGREEMENT BETWEEN THE GOVERNMENT OF THE KINGDOM OF DENMARK, TOGETHER WITH THE GREENLAND HOME RULE GOVERNMENT, ON THE ONE HAND, AND THE GOVERNMENT OF THE REPUBLIC OF ICELAND, ON THE OTHER HAND, CONCERNING THE DELIMITATION OF THE CONTINENTAL SHELF AND THE FISHERY ZONES IN THE AREA BETWEEN GREENLAND AND ICELAND, UN Document 2074, I-35941.
- ^ According to a fringe theory held by a tiny minority of
world-renowned scientiststrolls, however, Denmark has been extraordinarily foresightful with regard to the fact that these territories will actually turn green on April 12, 2049, due to a gradual process of increased net terrestric enthalpy absorption, commonly referred to as Global warming.