User:LycheeJelly1/Anderson Park (Redmond, Washington)/Jonathan Kvech Peer Review
Peer review
Complete your peer review exercise below, providing as much constructive criticism as possible. The more detailed suggestions you provide, the more useful it will be to your classmate. Make sure you consider each of the following aspects: LeadGuiding questions:
ContentGuiding questions:
Tone and BalanceGuiding questions:
Sources and ReferencesGuiding questions:
OrganizationGuiding questions:
Images and MediaGuiding questions: If your peer added images or media
For New Articles OnlyIf the draft you're reviewing is for a new article, consider the following in addition to the above.
Overall impressionsGuiding questions:
Examples of good feedbackA good article evaluation can take a number of forms. The most essential things are to clearly identify the biggest shortcomings, and provide specific guidance on how the article can be improved.
Additional Resources |
General info
edit- Whose work are you reviewing?
LycheeJelly1
- Link to draft you're reviewing
- User:LycheeJelly1/Anderson Park (Redmond, Washington)
- Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
- Anderson Park (Redmond, Washington)
Evaluate the drafted changes
editLead
The first sentence of the lead section is quite long. Maybe consider splitting it up into separate sentences, with “Anderson Park is a park located in Redmond, Washington listed on the National Register of Historic Places” as the first one. Content What you have added is a good start on the information about the park and its namesake. One thing I would suggest is expanding upon Albert Anderson. What exactly Anderson has to do with this park in particular and why they named this specific park after him, as opposed to other parks. Possibly expand upon its previous functions as the senior center as well as the specific city administrative offices that resided within the park prior to the development of city hall. Tone and Balance The content added does appear to come from a neutral lens towards the park. However, with the statements, such as “key to the modern redevelopment of the park”, be careful with opinion-based statements on what classifies as “key”. Possibly consider naming examples of Andersons “key” efforts regarding park projects and volunteer coordination. I would try to include more objective facts based upon the park’s functions and the public services it offers. Sources and References Sources used do seem to be up to date and relevant to the topic. I would suggest trying to find more sources, alternative to just the parks website and the national registry. If you cannot find any online news articles on the park, I would suggest maybe going to a local King county library and/or the library website if possible and seeing if there is any information on the subject there. Organization Again, I would re-arrange the first sentence and check the grammar used. In addition, attempt to expand upon things addressed in the lead area, for example add a section on elaborating on the parks namesake and exactly how he was so important to the park that it was named after him. As well as, adding a section about the park’s public functions past and present, describing exactly how and why it is used by the public. Images and Media N/A Overall impressions The work that you have added looks to have improved the quality of the article. Again, as I have stated, I would suggest expanding upon the namesake of the park and his specific contributions. In addition to expanding upon the park’s past/current public functions as well. Good start, I wish you luck in your search for more information to expand! |