Abram 2020 For the People. We do it for america, for the people.
He was born in the blistering winds of the north in 1832. Abram came to lead us all into a new era of needlessly dangerous fun havery. He dreams of a nation with fireball in every freezer, a big block... in every garage. Legend has it, if you put your ear to the ground and listen closely after exactly eight beers, you can hear him howl at the sun as a 460 ford bellows the song of our people. What office does he run for you might ask. Don't worry about it. He doesn't run for office, it runs from him. In the fall of 2020 he brokered a historic peace treaty with The King of the Idiots insuring the maximizing of all fun for future generations of degenerates. They also worked to establish a groundbreaking dental health program involving vodka that is credited with curing 100% of diseases nearly 70% of the time.