Jonny was a 15 year old ponce from Stocksfield. He was five foot eleven, incredibly handsome, but tragically died on the 11.12.08, at a Slipknot gig, where he was pummeled to death, and smashed in the facial region with a large cuboid of kiln-hardened clay. A brick. He was rushed to hospital, but the paramedics were unable to save him on the way.
Jonny was a kind friend, who was a notorious lady-lover, known for his gentle intimacy and bruising kisses. He was a friend of all, and was the reliable friend you could ever ask for. Normally you don't have to ask for a friend, but Jonny could never resist a new "buddy". He would satisfy your needs, whether male or female, and he certainly satisfied those of both genders (haemaphrodites).
Jonny contributed much to the world of synthesised music, such as his chart topper "Yet Another Rave" and also the not so famous, but far better "Cheese". In his time Jonny made many blunders, like falling up the stairs frequently, and also he was extremely inept at controlling CD players. He never felt pain, unless you hit his abnormally large and swollen... jonny.
He loved Harvey so much. Harvey was his best friend. He also loved Rachael dearly because she loved musicals. HAHA OBV(:
He dressed like a little Techno Kid, but listened to all forms of music, including Metal, Rock, Bhangra, Techno, Drum n Bass and even Country and Western. He had an inimitable love of all things music - they were incredibly, easy to disrespect. Jonny was known throughout the world as the "Techno Kid", and while not as famous as the "Milky Bar Kid", he did much more for the community of Stocksfield. He wasn't afraid of anything - the only time he was ever afraid, was during the time when he was whacked by that brick. He didn't cry though - he was unconcious.
This is poor Jonny's story. We hope it moves your hearts to give generously to Wikipedia - it was worth a laugh.