Ajx01

September 2009

Welcome to Wikipedia, and thank you for your contributions. One of the core policies of Wikipedia is that articles should always be written from a neutral point of view. A contribution you made to Oakland University appears to carry a non-neutral point of view, and your edit may have been changed or reverted to correct the problem. Please remember to observe our core policies. Thank you. Kevin Forsyth (talk) 16:01, 3 September 2009 (UTC)

re: Oakland University

Your edit appears to come from a particular point of view because it is a synthesis: put simply, it "combine[s] material from multiple sources to reach a conclusion not explicitly stated by any of the sources." Yes, you have some reliable sources, but you have either misquoted them or extrapolated from them to support your contentions. To be specific:

• The slogan "you can afford this" does not appear in the cited reference. Perhaps it did before, but it does not now.
• Who sees the raise in tuition as hypocritical? You do, clearly, but do others? Given the lack of a source for this statement, and your continued replacement of the edit despite apparent growing consensus to remove it, perhaps you can see how it could be construed as POV.
• Nowhere in any of the cited articles is hypocrisy mentioned, nor controversy with regard to tuition rates.
• "The school board deemed it necessary" is more snarky than dispassionate in its tone.
• The AARP article does not support the statement "faculty salary and benefits rank among the lowest of the Michigan State colleges, and are uncompetitive on a nationwide basis". The article ranks OU 7th out of 15 in the state — in the middle of the pack, not "among the lowest" — and quotes a union officer as saying, "The problem is finding the money for reasonable raises to keep your university competitive", which is not the same as being presently uncompetitive.
• None of your sources mention a 10% raise for the athletic units.

Please read the policies and guidelines linked above, rewrite your edit to resolve the issues I've listed here, and find reliable sources to support it. I hope you do — as written it cannot stand, but the subject matter is interesting and probably deserves mention in this article in some form. Cheers, Kevin Forsyth (talk) 13:55, 6 September 2009 (UTC)