Davitg13
| This user is a student editor in University_of_California,_Berkeley/African_Politics_(Spring_2020) . |
Welcome!
editHello, Davitg13, and welcome to Wikipedia! My name is Shalor and I work with Wiki Education; I help support students who are editing as part of a class assignment.
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If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me on my talk page. Shalor (Wiki Ed) (talk) 17:45, 25 February 2020 (UTC)
Selina's Peer Review
editLead Section
So far, the lead section is concise and short enough to summarize your article. In this section, I don't believe you have to compare it to Rwanda's ethnic population during the lead section. I don't think it adds much context to the article or doesn't pertain to the goal of the lead section. I think you did a good job summarizing the information in a way that tells the reader what will be covered in the rest of the article; 1) background behind ethnic group composition, 2) tension between these ethnic groups and 3) democracy efforts.
Content
The content of your article is relevant to your topic. You did a good job of categorizing the population shifts from the pre-colonial era to the present. I think for the last two sections, you could add more clarity as to how ethnic conflict and democratization efforts have shaped each ethnic group. For example, which groups are being favored? Is there a group that doesn't get to vote as a result of these conflicts? Does this affect citizenship for a certain group? I only add these questions because my paper focuses on similar aspects of ethnic group conflict and I think it adds some perspective to clearly identified and separate each ethnic group according to its role and level of legitimacy during these movements.
Tone and Balance
You also do a good job of maintaining an impartial tone throughout the article. You stick to the facts and your personal viewpoints do not get in the way of the article's neutral tone.
Sources and References
It seems like you have used reliable sources for your article. I checked some of the links and they did work! You draw heavily from author Peter Uvin's (1999) article so I would recommend adding other reliable sources/authors in order to make your article stronger and more diverse in sources.
Organization
So far, your article is well-organized. Especially categorizing the population shifts. In the categories regarding ethnic tensions and violence and democracy, maybe you can add subsections with major events. Maybe add some examples of the ethnic tensions incidents in Burindi that shaped social or political dynamics.
Images and Media
Not applicable given that you don't utilize media in your article so far.
Overall impressions
Overall, I think you have a strong draft. The "Indigenous Population" section is the strongest as its structure is clear and easy to follow. The last two sections seem to need more context or more examples to draw on their significance. Gonzalez.selinav (talk) 02:00, 7 April 2020 (UTC)