- Tianyi's Comment:
Hi, Regan!
Thank you for the comment! Your advises are valuable to me. Here is my idea after reading the page of Communication Privacy Management Theory.
Many expressions seem confusing to me on the current page. For example, the introduction part does not clearly provide the explanations of "self-disclosure".
I am not very familiar with this theory, and I can not find the necessarily logical relationship among those three concepts of "Dialectic of privacy versus disclosure", "Nature of information sharing", "System for privacy rule management". I don't think they look like three levels or three main contributory parts of this theory. Or are they just three core ideas? I can't find clear answers of this. Even if the answer is yes, this page should still devote certain space to describe their connections. Also, it looks unbalanced that the first two titles have no subtitles while the third one has three. Especially, the section of "Nature of information sharing" is too wordy. I believe it will be better if it is divided into several parts. In addition, The title of "Dialectic of privacy versus disclosure" does not match the forms of the latter two ones.
The last section, Strengths and weaknesses, might be a little superficial and rough. What's more, at the end of this section, the application fields are mentioned. In my opinion, they should be moved into a newly developed section about applications.
Finally, this page shares similar problems with the page that I am going to edit. Some parts have many syntax errors; Some parts lack logical consistence and need to be more re-organized. --Tc713 (talk) 04:13, 8 October 2013 (UTC)
Hi Regan!
Please feel free to send me a message on my talk page if you have any questions or concerns regarding Wikipedia. Have a great day! Fuerst.emily (talk) 16:13, 3 October 2013 (UTC)
Hey Regan! Thank you very much for your review of my theory! All your suggestions are great! I wanted to pay you back the favor, so I decided to review your Wikipedia page.
The fallowing are my observations: (I hope they are as useful as the ones you gave me)
1.- The introductory paragraph is a Little confusing. I think it will be better to develop the entire idea of what the theory is about and all the changes from boundary management to private management and then contrast it with SPT.
2.- I think that in the second stage: Dialectic of privacy versus disclosure requires a deeper explanation. Maybe justify the definition from Leslie Baxter and show the cognitive process or in which contexts people decide to conceal or reveal information.
3.- In the section of Nature of information sharing, the information should be more organized and broken up, the section is too long. This section mentions the disclosure of information through network. I don’t remember if you mentioned it in class but this would be something interesting to analyze.
4.- The last section about the System for privacy rule management is better structured, the information is presented with more order. However I would still like to see more examples.
I am sure you will create amazing improvements for this wikipedia page.
Gjd31 (talk) 21:42, 6 October 2013 (UTC) gjd31 Gjd31 (talk) 21:42, 6 October 2013 (UTC)