User talk:Jarzofjam/sandbox

Draft Evaluation 192ac

Hey Jarzofjam's group, I'm going to evaluate your draft article for the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge. Firstly, I really liked the idea to add a hashtag and social media subsection or addition to the page. On the ALS Ice Bucket Page there is only one mention of the hashtag, which seems like way too little. You guys mentioned some of the data numbers of Facebook and Twitter to describe the movement, which I believe you can expand upon. Personally, the numbers of these movements and how much interactions they get is very interesting and shows how big of a reach the movement had digitally. I also found the drought section that you added to be very interesting and how various groups reacted to it using natural water, etc. to do the challenge. You mentioned individual cases like California & China, but perhaps you could expand it out a little bit. I do like how you kept all the information that you added was relevant to the challenge. The other two pages I evaluated had a tough time segregating relevant information to the page and just adding information to talk about the overall topic. Keep up the good work in that regard. You guys also did a great job of editing the article/writing the article in Wikipedia language. Everything is cited correctly and you guys wrote everything from a neutral point of view. A minor suggestion would be to add the full date that Gov. Brown announced a state of emergency as I see no reason for it not be cited as such.

-LonzoMVP2025