User talk:Jenrosales12/sandbox

Latest comment: 8 years ago by Jenrosales12

Hi Jen! Awesome job on your first draft. The information you included was straightforward and informative to the reader, and I felt like I was reading right from an encyclopedia which is the purpose of what this website is for. Also, I think it's great that you had so many sources of information to contribute to the Article - This alone will let readers know that this is a reliable source. The organization of the information made it easy for me to follow along and made it easy for me to read, too.

One suggestion I have for you is just to organize the information you have into a few subsections such as "Overview," "Companies of the European Broadcasting Union," etc. I used this suggestion from one of our training courses and I think it makes the information easier for readers to look at because it's more broken up. Another suggestion would be to possibly check it over once more to add commas where necessary, italicize European Broadcasting Union, and italicize names of companies from the countries you mentioned. (For my article I copied and pasted the work into a Word Doc to do a Grammar Check just incase I missed anything so this might be helpful!)

Otherwise, this is very well-written and with just a few more edits I think this is definitely ready to be published. Mpaganelli (talk) 03:41, 24 October 2016 (UTC)Reply

Thank you for your positive and constructive feedback! Your feedback was very helpful. I took into consideration adding in subsections and you are right it does make it easier to read. Also, I italicized and hyperlinked the European Broadcasting Union so hopefully that makes it better. Jenrosales12 (talk) 22:24, 30 October 2016 (UTC)Reply

Hi Jenny: This is really well done and I agree with Marissa that you could break up the information into distinct sections, such as “Overview” and “Companies”. You could also remove the last sentence that reads ”Above are only a couple of countries and the companies that deliver information and entertainment to their viewers in the European Broadcasting Area,” since you, or anyone else working on this page in the future, can always add additional research on companies within countries in the EBA. I also agree that you can italicize European Broadcasting Union. Additionally, you should also link to the European Broadcasting Union article in your first sentence that reads “The members of the European Broadcasting Union are able to provide…” Lastly, as you’re polishing up your work, you may want to look over the article on Wikipedia called “Writing Better Articles” to make sure that you are hitting all of the facets that make up effective articles. Also, I’m not sure if you’ve considered this, but any images would also help to enliven the page. If you decide that you’d like to incorporate image, make sure to take a look at using images in Wikipedia here and also Wikipedia’s picture tutorial.

Overall, excellent work! Keep making revisions so that you publish this on the live EBA page soon.

Best, Prof.bgreg (talk) 01:01, 25 October 2016 (UTC)Reply