User talk:Kalpert94/sandbox

Main Points

Overall, the article looks good: well documented with plenty of hyperlinks and references. The author may consider changing some of the headers and some slight reorganization. If any more information can be found, education could probably be split off as it is hard to associate it with early life. I would also like to review again after the author has added in the additional material he is planning.

Minor Points

The author tended to start sentences with "In (year)" which could be changed to starting with the subject instead. Besides this, the author remained in the same verb tense and was largely free of grammatical errors.

Jsphjh (talk) 03:27, 11 November 2014 (UTC)

WM's Peer Review

Summary

The first article is about Harry Dornbrand, an engineer who was important in the field of satellite technology, including his biography, family, and career.

The second article is about American Satellite Corporation, a subsidiary of Fairchild Industries that Harry Dornbrand is president of.

Major points

The first article is well-sourced and very well-structured for the most part. Obviously, the TODO's still have to be done.

The second article could use a photo (perhaps the ASC's logo?).

Minor Points

In the first article, do you need to put"Fairchild Industries" or "ATS-6" in the "See Also" section when they're both mentioned and linked several times in the actual article?

Heyx3 (talk) 08:27, 11 November 2014 (UTC)