User talk:Koko413/sandbox

Latest comment: 5 years ago by Sydneycurrie5

Good usage of examples and statistics to back up your claim. Maybe try adding a few examples of McDonald's and KFC's revised Chinese menu as well. --Jasonkung22 (talk) 21:15, 31 March 2019 (UTC)Jasonkung22Reply


Great job, but you can also provide more examples of other brand such as KFC or McDonald's ChristalCao (talk) 23:54, 31 March 2019 (UTC)Reply


You did an excellent information, it will be perfect if you could expand a little more on how's it affect the relationship between fast food and people's daily diet.Samuelzhao000005 (talk) 15:40, 1 April 2019 (UTC)Samuelzhao000005Reply

This is great! For syntax, maybe you could combine the sentences "However, it has transformed into a medium priced restaurant in China" and "...has added wine lists and a three course menu with fine desserts..." Also, will you or somebody else in your group talk about other fast food places? I see you have an image of McDonalds already on your page... Isamouse79 (talk) 15:56, 3 April 2019 (UTC)Reply

This post is very interesting. I completely can relate to you on the fact fast food joints in the US are drastically different abroad. When living in Abu Dhabi, they started to have a sit-down Mcdonalds, where the waiter brings food to your table. For improvement, I would give some other fast food restaurant examples and go more in-depth with them Charlier118 (talk) 16:03, 3 April 2019 (UTC)Reply

I think that this content is very interesting and I think you do a great job of explaining it. You could expand a little bit more and go beyond talking about Pizza Hut but maybe mention another restaurant. You could also add some internal links to make the content stronger. However the sentence structure is strong and it is very fact driven. Isabelleshegog (talk) 16:06, 3 April 2019 (UTC)IsabelleReply

This is a really interesting topic! You should spend a little more time with sentence structure and wording. Also, don't forget to specify the US dollar. I think that there is a specific name we are supposed to use. Also you can definitely add a few hyperlinks to this article.SocksOfDeath (talk) 16:09, 3 April 2019 (UTC)Reply

I like the topic you chose and the structure of your writing but i think you need to add more citations and have more facts to back up your writing. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Wohlina (talkcontribs) 16:11, 3 April 2019 (UTC)Reply

Your page is very interesting and I like your unique topic! The image is also nice as it adds to your audience's experience when learning about your topic. One suggestion I have is maybe adding a few hyperlinks and subsection titles/headings to organize your passage more. Great job! Fariha34 (talk) 16:23, 3 April 2019 (UTC)Reply

Great job on choosing the topic and on organizing the ideas! You maybe forgot to add the section/subsection your article will go into, and you should work on that. You should expand more this introductory paragarph and some citation into it/. Besides that, I think your sandbox is very interesting and the example that you chose on Pizza Hut is very fact-driven. One thing that I didn't understand, and maybe you will work on it, is that you used an image of Mc Donalds when you don't even talk about this fast food. You should talk about Mac Donalds in the future or change the image.Rafamatalon1234 (talk) 16:30, 3 April 2019 (UTC)Reply

Good work! You have chosen a very interesting topic for your article. I would add a section to clarify what you are talking about. Also, an introduction may be useful. The image you have chosen is a little unrelated. keep working! Ashleydavidsongwu (talk) 16:33, 3 April 2019 (UTC)Reply

Good Job! I would add more sources and include different fast food restaurants as well to provide a broader summary of the fast food industry in China rather than just Pizza Hut. I would also add more information on the fast food market in China and why these changes have been made. Lorenaramirezl (talk) 22:33, 5 April 2019 (UTC)Reply

Good job! Maybe add a section heading and more sources! Sydneycurrie5 (talk) 20:34, 7 April 2019 (UTC)Reply