User talk:MaScott14/sandbox

Peer Review

You've done a great job adding the youth perspective to this article, you pinpointed two major causes of PTSD in children and included viewpoints from outside the global north. That being said what you need changed is merely grammatical, or a few minor fixes to change the flow or wording of the sentences. The first sentence under the Child Soldiers section could be removed, as it is a bit awkward. Instead of creating a short sentence to link to the child soldiers in Africa article, I thought you could put it here...

   ""One of the most complex and severely traumatized group of war-affected children are "child soldiers"", <-- link to article here 

The main problem with the sentence is this section here:

   A situation that exposes a youths to trauma is when they are forced to become Child soldiers in Africa.

I would write:

   Being forced to become a child soldier is a situation that can expose youth to trauma, particularly in Africa. <-- link to article 

You also did well on the section for natural disasters, especially mentioning Hurricane Katrina. You really found a lot of really good facts to include in the article and citations to back them up.

Congrats!

Zombiesatemyneighbors (talk) 05:36, 11 November 2014 (UTC)

Peer Review

Hello Mascott,

I think you are doing a great job so far adding a youth context to ptsd. I could only really think of a couple of suggestions. I was reading the section above listed as “foster care” and I was wondering if it could maybe be incorporated with your youth section. I also feel that the section on foster care is a little under-developed and could maybe help give context to the work on youth ptsd. Perhaps this could include the factors that push children into foster care to begin with. Also, maybe another section including poverty and unstable family arrangements could be beneficial to explain some of the causation for ptsd in young people.

I really like what you have done with the child soldiers and youth and natural disasters. I think the child soldiers section is particularly strong with lots of great evidence. I like the youth and natural disasters section a lot but I feel like maybe it could be a little more concise.

Thank you for your work on this important topic. Note- this is all constructive criticism and you can take any of this advice with a grain of salt. I think in the end you will know what is best for your project. Keep up the good work. Djansen15 (talk) 02:21, 10 November 2014 (UTC)