Mlm957
Joined 29 September 2011
Latest comment: 12 years ago by Jonkerz in topic Caroline Earle White review
Caroline Earle White review
editHi Mlm957, I saw your message on User talk:B.chachere asking for a review of Caroline Earle White. I read your article article and must say that it is really good for a new contributor (or any contributor for that matter!) as it is well written, well referenced, follows style guidelines and contains wikilinks and photos. Great job!
I only made a few small nitpicking changes:
- Changed "Mrs. White" to "White" per WP:SURNAME which says "After the initial mention of any name, the person should be referred to by surname only, without an honorific prefix such as "Mr", "Mrs", "Miss", or "Ms"."
- Changed Category:Animal rights movement to Category:Animal rights advocates, because categories should be as precise as possible. I also added Category:American philanthropists.
- Added "American" to the lead as nationality is a defining characteristic of a person.
- Added a few wikilinks such as gander pulling.
- Changed "MA" to "Massachusetts" as American geographical locations may not be obvious to all of Wikipedia's readers. I also added wikilinks to some other places for the same reason.
- Changed to lower case in one section heading per WP:Section caps, which says "Use sentence-style capitalization, not title-style capitalization: Capitalize the first letter of the first word and any proper nouns in headings, but leave the rest lower case."
- Changed the order of 'External links' and 'References' per WP:FOOTERS.
- Changed "passed away" to "died" per WP:EUPHEMISM which says "The word died is neutral and accurate. Avoid euphemisms such as resting place."
Overall it is a great article and I hope we will see more contributions from you in the future! If you have any questions or thoughts on my changes, feel free to ask me anything on my talk page, cheers, jonkerz♠ 01:15, 8 December 2011 (UTC)