MollyMoxenFree
This user is a student editor in Middle_Georgia_State_University/Writing_for_Digital_Media_(Summer_2020) . |
Welcome to NMAC 3108
editGlad to have you aboard. I'm looking forward to working with you this summer. —Grlucas (talk) 16:57, 28 May 2020 (UTC)
Welcome!
editHello, MollyMoxenFree, and welcome to Wikipedia! My name is Shalor and I work with Wiki Education; I help support students who are editing as part of a class assignment.
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If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me on my talk page. Shalor (Wiki Ed) (talk) 16:12, 1 June 2020 (UTC)
A light review
editThe history portion is pretty cool. I think the first thing I personally would do is write the history chronologically. You start with 3000 B.C. then we move to the 1900s, early 2000s, 2005, back to early 2000s, Ta-hoe Nalu in 2007, to the 20th Century in Tel Aviv, then 1940s Waikiki surf instructors Duke Kahanamoku, the 1990s surf schools, 2003 Buffalo Big Board, Kai Lenny in 2012 and then jump back to the magazine in 2007. In my opinion(I’m not a professional) it feels like the jumps in time may be afterthoughts. Like the sentence about the magazine seems like an “oh yeah, by the way,” moment. Does that make sense? It’s still a great article, and that’s just something I would do.
DdwashjrDdwashjr (talk) 02:56, 1 July 2020 (UTC)
- Mahalo for the feedback. I hadn't paid much attention to the timeline presented, instead focusing on the organization of other sections. But I 100% agree. This will be added to my list of things to work on and improve. MollyMoxenFree (talk) 11:45, 1 July 2020 (UTC)