Skaterbab

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Hello, Skaterbab, and welcome to Wikipedia! My name is Shalor and I work with the Wiki Education Foundation; I help support students who are editing as part of a class assignment.

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Peer Review

Hi Brent! It's Jade. Your Wikipedia article is complicated for sure. The guy who added all that political stuff may have a point, but since you have to be unbiased, it's going to be tricky. He doesn't connect the facts or at least doesn't give enough facts on all ends for the reader to come to that conclusion. I think the idea that politics has an effect on poverty in Tanzania, is acceptable, but you need to find research reviews and organize that better.

I think the "Political Context" part could be put into the history of Tanzania, or maybe the "Political History of Tanzania."

Poverty in Tanzania

This section is good! It states facts and is unbiased. I think it was also good to point out the difference in poverty in urban areas versus rural areas because then that leads to the question on what's being counted as Tanzania for the World Bank reports, and why.

Political Commitment to Poverty Alleviation

This was also a great section. I would make a link to the Millennium Development Goals, Sustainability Development Goals, National Strategy for Growth and Reduction in Poverty, and the Zanzibar Strategy for Growth and Reduction of Poverty. I would also make sure that you've cited everything you need to.

How you organize this article will rely on your decision on how to frame it. Will you continue this frame of political context? You could make subsections titled "Energy Sector" or "Agriculture" and talk about how that is contributing to poverty. There's a lot of ways to go about this. I think what's throwing you off is the skeleton that's already in place. Maybe you could try to gather your information, write it all down, and see where that takes you. Instead of having this guy's vision in mind, start fresh. Don't let anything influence you. Then you also wouldn't focus on your research through a political context. Right now, the article gives policy solutions to the issue of poverty, but nothing about what poverty is now.

He talks about how implementing agricultural technology will induce unemployment and malnutrition. Delete that. Biased af.

Sorry, I'm getting confused as to which is your section and which parts he wrote. I'd say to get the facts on what exactly is poverty in Tanzania. You briefly talk about food poverty. Maybe you can look into what Tanzania grew before, and what created food insecurity.

Write in my talk box when you have more you want me to look at! I'm happy to help. Happy midterms season! Jjgotshwifty (talk) 06:48, 17 March 2018 (UTC)

Comments

Awesome username! Kuyachris (talk) 06:14, 24 January 2018 (UTC)

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Additional Resources
You can find answers to many student questions on our Q&A site, ask.wikiedu.org

If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me on my talk page. Shalor (Wiki Ed) (talk) 19:12, 19 January 2018 (UTC)

Peer Review

Hey! It was great collaborating in class yesterday.

First off, I think you are doing a great job at breaking down the current information that is on the Wikipedia article you are working on. After reading it, I can see why you wanted to edit most of the sections. It is a very important topic to consider for your PE and I can see that you are off to a great start. As I mentioned in class, your edits are clear and straight forward, which is good for the purpose of this assignment. Each section also follows the lead clearly and is relevant. Other than minor grammar errors and wording, the facts you want to focus on are clear. There were sections that felt argumentative, so I would suggest reading the sections out loud to see if you hear the same thing in your tone. Some sections, like the one on Political commitment to poverty alleviation, did not have many citations. I have never heard of or distinguished between medium and long term policies, so it may be helpful for the audience of this article to have further information regarding such policies. Perhaps hyperlink them if there is a Wikipedia page for the topic. Another thing I mentioned to you in class and wanted to comment on deals with the section on Food Poverty.For instance, you mention briefly that there is an extreme difference between food access in rural and urban areas. Consider hyperlinking Food Insecurity/Security to that section in order to provide further insight on how that is defined. Researching about food systems and any historical changes in food access in Tanzania may give you more information on the current rates and more to add to that section. Lastly, from the parts I read in the original article, there are a lot of sections that can use improvement and some sections don't seem relevant, but I can see improvements in the sections you are editing. I would advise to take a step back and analyze what is most relevant to your PE and the work you will be doing. Don't stress yourself out more than you need to by trying to fix the entire thing. Other than that, great start!124 srgarciaa (talk) 04:40, 16 March 2018 (UTC)