User talk:Soerfm/sandbox

Latest comment: 11 years ago by Soerfm in topic Revision July 2013

Revision July 2013

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I have made a revision mostly based on

  • Alexander, C. C.; Grimwood, J. M.; Swenson, L. S. (1966). This New Ocean: a History of Project Mercury (PDF). USA: NASA. ISBN 1934941875.
  • Catchpole, John (2001). Project Mercury - NASA's First Manned Space Programme. Chichester, UK: Springer Praxis. ISBN 1-85233-406-1. {{cite book}}: Invalid |ref=harv (help)

I have deleted some information:

  • claim in lead about planet Mercury (original research and not verified in body)
  • claim about spacecraft being worn not ridden (no citation)
  • claim about minor participants (no citation)
  • claim that MJ-1 was proposed as a heat shield test (no citation)
  • claim that MJ-2 was deemed unnecessary (no citation, contradicts budget constraint claim)

I reduced the information about T.J. O'Malley pushing the button to a footnote. I found a citation for the volume of the spacecraft, on the other hand, but it was 100 cubic feet and not 60 cubic feet. As requested, I have expanded the spacecraft section. I have also maximized the use of pictures. Finaly, I have deleted dead links and links overlapping Bibliography from External links section.

By the way, have you noticed that the kindle version of This New Ocean on Amazon includes an old version of the Wikipedia article? Soerfm (talk) 14:07, 9 July 2013 (UTC)Reply

Revision Facebook

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Article reads like list of announcements which is bad style and tends to be OR.

Sections moved to subarticles. Som summaries kept others not: either impossible to summarize or outdated or both. Mark Zuckerberg Founder, Chairman and Chief Executive Officer

Co-founder: Andrew McCollum not mentioned in newsroom fb.com:

Mark Zuckerberg is the CEO of Facebook, which he founded in 2004. Mark is responsible for setting the overall direction and product strategy for the company. He leads the design of Facebook's service and development of its core technology and infrastructure. Mark attended Harvard University and studied computer science before moving the company to Palo Alto, California.

Dustin Moskovitz is a co-founder of Facebook and was a key leader within the technical staff. He most recently worked on the company’s internal tools strategy and development. Dustin attended Harvard University as an Economics major for two years before moving to Palo Alto, California to work full-time at Facebook. Chris Hughes Co-founder

Chris Hughes is a co-founder of Facebook. Chris first worked as the Facebook spokesperson from his dorm room with Mark Zuckerberg and Dustin Moskovitz, and later moved to Palo Alto to work on the product team. Most recently, Chris served as the Director of Online Organizing for Barack Obama's 2008 presidential campaign. He holds a bachelor's degree in history and literature from Harvard University, where he graduated magna cum laude. Eduardo Saverin Co-founder

Eduardo Saverin is a co-founder of Facebook. Eduardo managed the business development and sales aspects during Facebook's early years. Eduardo graduated magna cum laude from Harvard College with a degree in Economics.