Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Charizard/archive1

  Us PCP members have put in 2 and a half days of work into getting this article to featured status. We have added at least 30 new references, improved all the sections, and added a couple of extra images. I think its time that this article gets nominated, if you object it, please provide a good reason, cheers Minun (マイナン) 13:56, 12 July 2006 (UTC)[reply]

Things still wrong -

  • In other media doesn't cover Charizard in the real world nearly enough, look at Torchic, or even Bulbasaur. You should have let editors have a chance to work on it.
  • Characteristics is in a "in-world" view point, as is In the video games.
  • The writing has weak areas, the prose in characterstics is poor.
  • Evolving, types and other Pokémon terms aren't explained.
  • There are unsourced statements in the anime.
  • The plurality of Charizard is muddled, they are sometimes referred to as singular, some times plural
  • Things are over linked, or linked multiple times.

This FAC was before it's time, Highway Batman! 10:34, 14 July 2006 (UTC)[reply]

I've fixed the mix of singular and plural words M inun (Spider-Man) 15:29, 14 July 2006 (UTC)[reply]
And now i've added the references for the anime M inun (Spiderman) 15:39, 14 July 2006 (UTC)[reply]
Do you support yet? —M inun Spiderman 16:00, 17 July 2006 (UTC)[reply]
  • Object, some of the above stuff is also true, but what really stands out is "In Other Media", which could (and should) be far longer, at least ten lines. Charizard is one of the more well-known Pokemon. —Cuiviénen 16:45, 12 July 2006 (UTC)[reply]
I know, I want to remove that section, but HighwayCello won't let me, and its my own work, so I don't see why I shouldn't be able to delete it, cheers Minun (マイナン) 18:35, 12 July 2006 (UTC)[reply]
You absolutely need that section, and I'm glad you've kept it. The article has been much improved, so I support. —Cuiviénen 17:01, 13 July 2006 (UTC)[reply]
Looking alright, with a vote of 3 supports and 4 objects, I just need to help fix the problems Celestianpower pointed out and then the FAC will be looking a lot better. Thanks for supporting, you've improved my wikimood. Minun (マイナン) 18:57, 13 July 2006 (UTC)[reply]
Thank you for your comments. A couple of things, the Bellyzard is perhaps the most well known strategy in the meta-game, so it definitely deserves a mention. And two, could you highlight the areas in-universe? Highway Return to Oz... 17:29, 21 July 2006 (UTC)[reply]
I am retracting my comments. I read through the article to quickly, so I am changing my opion to Support.--Ac1983fan(yell at me) 17:43, 21 July 2006 (UTC)[reply]
  • Object. First, 5 out of 5 citations checked in a citation spot check had problems (results here), and I see that this leans quite heavily on a site (serebii.net) that looks quite unprofessional (its articles are littered with spelling and grammatical errors). Other sources need to be found to replace serebii.net, and someone needs to go through the references one by one and fix all cases where the statement in the article is not directly supported by a statement in the source.
  • Second, this needs a copyedit. The first section provides some good examples of issues that crop up throughout:
    • "Through evolution, a metamorphic change within a Pokémon caused by gaining experience in battle,": Perhaps replace with "through evolution, a sort of metamorphosis that Pokemon undergo as a result of gaining experience in battle'? Within is not the right word here, and the current structure of the sentence fails to identify who is doing the gaining (not that it isn't clear from the context, but it's grammatically necessary to clarify it).
    • "Charizard grow a pair of powerful wings, which allow them to fly at altitudes approaching 4,600 ft (1400 m), supplementing the fiery breath they would inherit": This sentence changes voices halfway through; it needs to be either all indicative or all subjunctive. Supplementing is also an iffy wording here; replace it with "and supplement" and remove the comma after "(1400 m)", perhaps?
    • "...earlier forms of Charmander..."; Change to "...earlier forms, Charmander..."
    • "However, the flames they produce as Charizard are even hotter than those produced by Charmeleon; at full intensity they would have the power to melt solid rock or large glaciers.": Why "however"? This doesn't contradict any previous statements. Perhaps change to "furthermore"? This is another sentence that goes from indicative to subjunctive in midstream. And why "even hotter"? "Hotter" will suffice.
    • "are said to ": Drop altogether.
    • "noted to rely on claws...": Change to "and rely on their claws..."
    • "Nevertheless, the strength of their flame is said to be so volatile, that accidental or careless uses have been noted to cause forest fires and other disasters.": Perhaps "Their flame is so strong that it has caused forest fires and other disasters when used accidentally or carelessly." "Nevertheless" is unnecessary, as it "have been noted to", and what does it mean to say that the "strength is so volatile"?
  • Similar prose issues need to be fixed throughout; note that none of my above suggestions should be interpreted as endorsements of writing this section in an in-universe perspective; I was just going off of what I had to work with. --RobthTalk 20:38, 21 July 2006 (UTC)[reply]