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Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Project Emily/archive1

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was archived by Gog the Mild via FACBot (talk) 29 April 2021 [1].

Project Emily

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Nominator(s): Hawkeye7 (discuss) 21:00, 6 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

This article is about the deployment of American-built Thor intermediate-range ballistic missiles (IRBMs) in the United Kingdom between 1959 and 1963, which were operated by the Royal Air Force Bomber Command as part of the British nuclear deterrent. Hawkeye7 (discuss) 21:00, 6 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from HumanxAnthro

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References

On first impressions, cites are well-formatted, though I don't know why any of the publisher and work names aren't linked to their respective articles.

Lead
  • I find lead pretty lackluster given the several details and sections in the body; not even its preservation gets a sentence.
Background
  • I've noticed this sentence suffers from long sentences and a lack of varying lengths to keep it interesting, and the sentences are the same overly-long length.
  • Most of the jargon is linked and elaborated, but there's a couple that still needs elaboration or linked to introductory readers. What is a "manned bomber"? What is a "production model atomic bomb" and how does it differ from a regular atomic bomb? What are nautical miles?
  • Why is the first atomic bomb landing specified by an operation name and a full date, yet the first production model atomic bomb launch is present with only the location, month, and year without a day or operation name? Is it because of the reliable sources not revealing it? Just want to know, that's all.
  • "Britain's nuclear weapons armament was initially based on free-fall bombs delivered by the V bomber force, but the possibility of the manned bomber becoming obsolete by the late 1960s was foreseen"
    • (1) What does it mean for the nuclear weapons to be "based on" a type of bomb? Did their designs take influence from them?
    • (2) Like I asked, what is a manned bomber?
    • (3) What is the message of this sentence, and how do the two clauses connect to each other?
  • "In parallel to the ICBM programme, the United States developed three separate intermediate range ballistic missile (IRBM) systems." Even though they're named later in the paragraph, I would still follow this sentence with a list of the three names of the IRBMs for ease of navigability.
  • "The United States National Security Council gave the ICBM and IRBM projects the highest national priority.[16]" How?
Negotations
  • "Implicit in Wilson's decision to develop an IRBM was that it would be based overseas." It may be I'm not the biggest history expert, but I find the use of "based" confusing? The following sentences seem to indicate this sentence means that he want IRBMs to "launch" overseas, not that they were "based" (or as I read it, located) overseas.

I'll stop here for now. So far, the prose is generally well-done and understandable (though as an American I can't tell if it keeps true to British English) but could use the fixes I mentioned above. 👨x🐱 (talk) 01:20, 7 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

To address your points:

  • A "production model" of something is a mass-produced version as opposed to a prototype. Bombs used in nuclear tests were normally prototypes, although occasionally a production model was used.
  • Nuclear tests invariably have code names, but the delivery of production ordnance rarely does. Sources only give the month; my practice is to make dates as specific as possible, to make life easier for the people trying to paraphrase the Wikipedia.
    1. By "based on free-fall bombs delivered by the V bomber force" I meant as opposed to missiles
    2. The term "manned bomber" is a bit of a tautology, as bombers invariably have crews. Linked "bomber" and removed "manned" per MOS:GNL.
    3. The point is to emphasise the distinction been aircraft and missiles.
  • The NSC simply declared that the projects had the highest national priority. In practice this meant that they had priority for human, financial and materiel resources, over other uses.
  • The missiles had to be based overseas. Deploying them at the last minute was not an option.

Hawkeye7 (discuss) 04:28, 7 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Coordinator note

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This is coming up to the three week mark with no general supports. If it hits that mark without at least some indication beginning to form of a consensus to promote, I am afraid that it is liable to be archived. Gog the Mild (talk) 21:31, 25 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

I am afraid that there is no sign of a consensus to support forming, so I am regretfully going to archive this nomination. The nominator is exempted from the usual two-week wait under the minimal feedback provision. Gog the Mild (talk) 20:16, 29 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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