Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/School Rumble/archive3

The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was not promoted by SandyGeorgia 02:48, 8 April 2010 [1].

School Rumble

Nominator(s): 陣内 _Jinnai 22:12, 15 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]

I am nominating this for featured article because it has been some time and I have done my best after a PR to clean up what little remained about the article. No major info on the subject has appeared since the last FAC either.陣内 _Jinnai 22:12, 15 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Comments. No dab links; external links fine; alt text sufficient. Ucucha 00:42, 16 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Comment. Alt text is not sufficient. The alt text for File:School Rumble- Episode 2 Clip.ogv, for instance says: "A male cyclist chases a female cyclist who chases another male cyclist as they speed past other fast-moving vehicles". I defy anyone to tell what sex those two dots in the middle and far distance are supposed to be, and I see no fast-moving vehicles in that image. The prose even in the caption needs work: "A bike chase where Harima is chasing Tenma who is chasing Karasuma at an impossible speeds eventually passing Initial D's Trueno". --Malleus Fatuorum 00:58, 16 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]
- Have you watched the video? All aspects of it are in fact supported. Ucucha 01:04, 16 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  - The alt text is describing the static image on the page, not the video. I'm quite sure that if alt text is ever introduced for video clips that will be done in a similarly half-assed way as it's been done for static images. --Malleus Fatuorum 01:08, 16 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]
    - WP:ALT#Videos and animations says otherwise. Ucucha 01:09, 16 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]
      - As I said, half-assed. --Malleus Fatuorum 01:11, 16 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]
      - Let's look at the other image, File:School Rumble Volume 13 Cover.jpg, which has this as its alt text offering: "A tough-looking young man and a cute young girl dominate the cover, in front of the text "School Rumble Vol. 13". The man wears sunglasses, goatee and short mustache with his black hair pulled back. The girl's face appears in front of and below that of the young man; she has large blue eyes and black cowlick-pigtailed hair, wears a Japanese sailor suit school uniform, and holds up one hand in a gesture of hello, with two fingers and thumb extended." Who's judging "cute" or "tough"? They both look ridiculous to me, neither cute nor tough, and the girl is not wearing one of those Japanese sailor suit school uniforms. And of course the whole thing is ludicrously far too long. --Malleus Fatuorum 01:19, 16 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]
        I edited the image's alt text to remove those "offending" words and change the description for the uniform.陣内 _Jinnai 08:12, 16 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]
        I cleaned up the Alt text some more. What remains, remains because it is necessary to describe the characters.陣内 _Jinnai 04:52, 24 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Comments

Yes, we really do need an easy how-to-do-it guide to writing alt texts. Eubulides? Are you there?
"enigmatic"—normal English word; do we really need a dictionary link? If so, I see lots of others that would need light-blue links: damsel, amnesia, protagonists. Let's not, unless it really is rather technical or unlikely to be known by educated English-speakers.
- ~~Eh, I'm not so sure it is as common as you think, but maybe I'm wrong. At least several people I've mentioned the word to either didn't know or confused the meaning.~~
  - Went ahead and removed it anyway, though i still believe it isn't as common as you believe.陣内 _Jinnai 01:17, 27 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]
No hyphen after -ly adverbs. Please see MoS.
- Done.陣内 _Jinnai 08:27, 16 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]
"thereafter" is a bit old-fashioned nowadays. Just "after"?
- After doesn't really work as it doesn't have the same meaning. I can use "after that" or "afterward", but this was one of those item i describe as being changed in by an independent copyedit before.陣内 _Jinnai 08:27, 16 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]
Who is writing "in order to"? Spot the two redundant words.
- Fixed both instances.陣内 _Jinnai 08:27, 16 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]
An awkward noun plus -ing: "Kobayashi never envisaged the series being adapted into an anime". Why not: "Kobayashi never envisaged that the series would be adapted into an anime."
- Done.陣内 _Jinnai 08:27, 16 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]

These are just a few points I picked out of the opening. I think it needs an independent copy-edit; but it's really not bad at all. Tony (talk) 07:00, 16 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]

I'll fix the issues you raise, but please, please find the perfect copy-editor. This article has been through 3 exhaustive independent FA-quality copy-editors and numerous lesser ones, each independent of the other. Every time I bring this here, someone finds something else they don't care for or other minor issues and suggests a full copy-edit is in order, which usually makes someone else the next time not like something that the copy-edit from last time changed. I feel for the most part that the copy-edits, unless they are specific are beginning to go into circles for this article.
I'll address the specific points raised though, especially those that are MoS problems.陣内 _Jinnai 08:12, 16 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]
Comment Yes it does seem a little too long, just improve it and eventually I will see one of my favorite anime grace the Main Page. Currently Neutral. Narutolovehinata5 ^tccsdnew 08:11, 17 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]

What do you mean by it? The article? If so, then some clearer ideas for how to condense it while keeping the information intact would be appreciated.陣内 _Jinnai 08:18, 17 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]

The plot section may or may not be too detailed. Anyway, at this rate, I don't feel like this article will pass (again) but should it, I will award my reward (see the reward board for more info) to those who helped. Narutolovehinata5 ^tccsdnew 08:28, 17 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]

It's 23 volumes involving a large cast of characters each with their own relationship. You can't really compress it much more without losing some key bits of understanding. Believe me, it used to be shorter and I had problems with the first FAC understanding what the series was about.陣内 _Jinnai 20:47, 17 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Comment According to tools:~dispenser/cgi-bin/rdcheck.py?page=School_Rumble 13 redirects point to non-existent section "Video games". This can be fixed by fixing these redirects or creating this section or by using {{anchor}}. — Dispenser 00:25, 18 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]
done Created the section to fix, if you want it to redirect to other media, merge the two sections again, then, redirect one by one. Thanks. Narutolovehinata5 ^tccsdnew 00:33, 18 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]
I forgot to put tl| in my comment (now fixed), the third way to do is ===Other related media {{anchor|Video games}}==. — Dispenser 00:52, 18 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]
Still neutral, will do whatever I can to improve it :) Narutolovehinata5 ^tccsdnew 03:40, 18 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]
The 2 sections are merged and anchored.陣内 _Jinnai 23:34, 18 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]
I actually merged them yesterday, just forgot how to anchor ;) Narutolovehinata5 ^tccsdnew 00:46, 19 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]
Comments
- What the heck does this mean: "Kobayashi and—for the"?
  - Fixed.陣内 _Jinnai 02:55, 5 April 2010 (UTC)[reply]
- "involving the series' two protagonists and a classmate"... do they have names?
  - Fixed.陣内 _Jinnai 02:55, 5 April 2010 (UTC)[reply]
- Later on in the article, some statements have too many refs. I counted six after one. Please limit these to one (the one that looks most reliable) unless the point is so controversial that the word of more experts etc. is needed.
  - In many cases, due to the nature of what is cited, FE CDs, the most i can do is combine those into 1 ref link. In other cases, I may have multiple statements using 1 ref. Per WP:CITE inline citations should go in most cases after punctuation. As such it is impossible to combine such references with the current widely used format into 1 link (as far as i know). I can look again and see if there are a few more i can combine, but I went through the article once already.陣内 _Jinnai 02:55, 5 April 2010 (UTC)[reply]
- I'm googling this stuff, and it's a rather complex little world in this school... how many characters? What's a guidebook? Why do we need guidebooks? The List of School Rumble characters is a great deal more informative than this article in this respect. Is that a good thing...?
  - We need to mention the guidebook in order for the article to be complete, but we don't need to go into detail. As for characters, there are a lot; there are a lot more that aren't even listed on the character article. This one mentions all the main and secondary characters. It was decided some time ago with discussions on Anime and Manga Wikiproject that a seperate character section would add little per WP:MOS-AM as the series focuses on character relationships and gags which can be summed up in a plot section.陣内 _Jinnai 02:55, 5 April 2010 (UTC)[reply]
- "it uses the cast to break every rule of reality, but does so playing it straight" This looks a heckuva lot like an unacknowledged direct quote – alse referred to as "copyvio". Are you folks watching your p's and q's here...?• Ling.Nut 18:26, 3 April 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  - It wasn't a quote, but poor paraphrasing. I just went ahead and quoted it because the statement seems quote worthy.
  - The "and-for" thing also sounds confusing to me, as well as the "two protagonists and a classmate" part. See if I can fix that. Narutolovehinata5 ^tccsdnew 03:30, 4 April 2010 (UTC)[reply]
    - I fixed everything but the quotes. I'll check again and see if there are any other refs i can combine into 1 ref statement later tomorrow.陣内 _Jinnai 02:55, 5 April 2010 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.