Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/The Wiggles/archive1
- The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.
The article was not promoted 04:25, 3 February 2008.
I'm nominating this article for featured article because I believe its quality deserves this designation. The Wiggles are important enough internationally to have a high-quality article on WP. This article has also successfully passed through the GA-nomination process, and as its primary editor, I believe it is now ready for FA-status. --Figureskatingfan (talk) 06:34, 26 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
- I think some work on the captions is due. The captions of the pictures in the Characters section should be redone; they were all taken at the Verizon Centre on November 8. For example, when using the this image the caption could state something about the big red car, rather than just "The Wiggles at the MCI Center". Spebi 08:14, 26 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Oppose—Not well-written. Please have someone else thoroughly copy-edit the whole thing. Here are random examples from the top.
- Are you working on the prose? The first para, for example, has: "According to Business Review Weekly, The Wiggles were Australia's "richest entertainers" for the year 2005, earning more than AC/DC and Nicole Kidman combined.[1] In 2006, it was reported that they earned AUS$50 million.[2]". Why is the source explicit for one but not the other? And was it the report about the $50M or their earning of it that occurred in 2006? Remove "the year". "AUS" never. "A" is fine, "AU" if you must.
- "A school project led to the recording of their first album and tour in 1991. Their basic act expanded to include other characters (Captain Feathersword, Dorothy the Dinosaur, Henry the Octopus, and Wags the Dog) and a troupe of dancers." So was that expansion on the tour? Need to say if so. It's vague.
- "By 2002, The Wiggles became the Australian Broadcasting Corporation's most successful pre-school property."—"Had become"; "property" is very colloquial in this sense.
- "In 2006, founding member Page was forced to retire from the group and was replaced by former dancer Sam Moran." "Founding member Page" doesn't read smoothly. "One of the founding members, Greg Page,"? If he was forced, that's unusual and requires a short explanatory phrase, even in the lead.
- Caption: tell us where the MCI Center is, and we won't be put off by the US spelling. Don't use a hyphen as an interrupter: "on 8 November 2007". It's fine without the auto-lemon blue date, but MOSNUM says to use the raw format prevalent in the country of origin.
- "Australian Broadcasting Corporation (ABC)"—Why is the acronym used on second appearance? Don't abbreviate at all unless you're going to use the abbreviation exclusively at least a few times through the text.
- I see redundant "also"s.
- "Early on"—rather informal.
- "In addition, the group has always had a strict code of conduct based on zero tolerance of drug use, drinking, smoking, or bad language by any employee or crew member." In addition is like "also"; rarely required and usually better killed off. "From the outset, the group has had a ...". And, not or, both times; "by employees and crew members" (but aren't crew members employees?). Tony (talk) 08:17, 26 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
- Oppose — Images in the "characters" section are cluttered. Article exhibits several writing problems per TONY's notes. (Ibaranoff24 (talk) 02:29, 27 January 2008 (UTC))[reply]
- I have made the changes as suggested. This article has been copy-edited, by LOCE, to get it to GA-status. Is there another resource to copy-edit more thoroughly? This article suffers from the same thing many WP articles experience: it truly has been written by lots of people, so the prose can tend to be choppy, uneven, and rough. Obviously, it needs lots of help, and as its main editor/contributor, my writing weaknesses really show. So we need lots of help. I changed the image captions and moved around the images in the Characters section to make it less cluttered. I'm not sure it was effective enough, so if someone with more experience with that kind of thing can help, that would be wonderful, as Henry the Octopus would say. Someone, please re-assess. --Figureskatingfan (talk) 21:26, 29 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
- Can we get a picture of a Wiggle doing the finger-wiggly thing that is mentioned as a mechanism so that they don't touch the children? That part is really awkwardly written - I spose it is an awkward topic, though. -Malkinann (talk) 01:55, 31 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
- There are all kinds of photos of the guys doing that move out there, but none of them are free. All the images that are currently in the article are the only free images available. Photos have been a problem for this article, as discussed on the talk page. It took some kind souls to donate what we have. I need to get to a Wiggles concert with a camera, but in the past few years they haven't come close to where I live to make it worth it. ("Hey, guys, stand all together and do that finger-wiggly thing!") Anyway, I wrote the finger-move stuff, and I haven't been able to make it less awkward. If someone wants to give it a try, feel free. --Figureskatingfan (talk) 03:53, 31 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
- Well, blow me down! (I need to stop saying that!) I found a picture of the finger-wagging move and placed it on in the article, as requested. It was donated by a lady who runs a scarily-obsessive fan page of Jeff Fatt on MySpace. Although what would be perfect is all four guys doing the move, I think this is adequate. --Figureskatingfan (talk) 23:46, 2 February 2008 (UTC)[reply]
- The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.